Your “3 Games But Only 1 Really Counts” NFL Football Open Thread

Is everything going to plan? I hope you and yours (if you’ve got a ‘yours’-I didn’t for the longest time and it was a mixed blessing) have got your shit together and are in the home stretch as far as getting organmazized. I only just now figured out that there’s no nighter tonight due to the double-header on tap tomorrow. I’ll not likely be able to catch the first one-I’ll be chained to a stove cooking my buttocks off or chained to a boring conversation having my ear chewed off. (“Do you know Fred Sassafrass? No? Let me tell you some juicy gossip about him anyway.”) I DON’T CARE! Guh. It’s the same damn thing every time. Are  the in-laws happy for someone when they do well for themselves? That would balance things out a bit. But no, that never happens. Forget about this silly tangent of mine. TO THE GAMES!

Jacksonville/San Fran:

Both have won 4 of their last 5 so it’s a bit interesting but not all that much. It’s good to see that there is life in the Niners after the acquisition of The World According to Janine Garoppolo. He’s been hitting at a 69% rate and will likely end up being the team leader in throwing yards having started a measely five whole games! He might end up being what Jerry Richardson calls “one of the good ones” but for now he’s simply hopped over a very low bar.

Seattle/Dallas: 

YAY! The “FEED ME” gesture is back and ready to make this cranky old fart toss something towards the TV tube. (not that close-she’s a beauty) With Atlanta crapping all over the field as of 3:48 EST, this game looks like a “separating the wheat from the chaff” type game. That excellent Seahawks run D you’ve heard about over the years gave up almost 250 yards vs. the Rammers last week. Oof.

New York Giants/Arizona:

Many have said that… Blech! Why bother? You’re not watching this travesty unfold.

Game on, Frenchy!

 

 

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Gratliff

Watching the Jim and Andy thing and Jim and Courtney Love are dancing while getting naked. That’s a whole lot of insanity in one place at one time.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ok peeps, I need LeVeon, Agholor, and Marshawn to combine for 24 points more than JuJu tomorrow. On a scale from Thernovich in the basement to a 15 year old in an Alabama mall, how fucked am I?

King Hippo

PPR, I think you’re favoured

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Yahoo says I’m favoUred by 1% but they don’t know shit

King Hippo

I’mma put up a night thread for the Hawaii Bowl and WCS’ masterpiece theatre.

ballsofsteelandfury

I just did.

King Hippo

then I just type up Hippo Thoughts. We jellen

Petronel

WOO!

Ya know, if we can keep Janeane healthy and give her some support in the offseason, maybe next season might not be too bad at all.

rockingdog

gotta figure 49ers win 9 games next season, rite?

Petronel

I’m not a projecting type (at least, not until training camp at the earliest), but there is more joy in Mudville these days, and .500 isn’t totally out of the question. I’m happy with that for now. 🙂

Doktor Zymm

Where does the Niners management fall in the hierarchy of teams that are capable of fucking up any vaugely positive thing?

Petronel

We still are stuck with Jed York.

King Hippo

Pretty good GAMBLOR, 3-fer-3 ATS, only 1-fer-3 moneyline, but the Bucs kinda screwed me and those are always long shots anyhow. Maybe the Raiders will pay of big tomorrow.

Romonobyl

I was out cutting the grass in my front yard (some shovel snow on X-Mas eve, we still mow down here), when I saw my neighbor across the street come outside and angrily yank the cords for all his Dallas Cowboys Christmas inflatables. Watching them slowly, sadly sink to the ground told me everything I need to know about the game.

Doktor Zymm

That is a lovely image, thank you for sharing

Unsurprised

LOL

Gratliff

I didn’t watch the second half. Sounds like I missed a lot of fun

hippofant

So Jimmy GQ’s soul belongs to Satan, right? That’s the only explanation.

rockingdog

you know it!!! whooo!

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