Instant Hippo Thoughts – Divisional Sabado, #NuAIDS Season

I hope all y’all are well, and staying sane-ish. [Why give up on madness now, when it’s brought me this far?]

Saturday gave us the two fixtures that I cared most to watch.  As usual, the NFL playoffs did a great job of confounding pre-kickoff expectations.  I had zero faith in Baby Buster [Jared Goff] who overall threw pretty well, especially given the conditions and his broke-ass THROWING hand thumb.  But I had absolute faith in Aaron Donald and the RRRRRRRRRRAM IT!! defensing unit, especially with starting LT David Bakhtiari out.

A.A. Ron [Rodgers] and Bay of Green tore them a new asshole, except when Lazard was dropping easy TD catches.

In fact, it was the PACKERS’ front seven that turned the tide, pressuring Buster into his shell on both key Q4 possessions (first, down 7 and with momentum, then down 14 and needing an immediate reaction).

OMG Arrested Development! — G.O.B., there's no need for violence. There never...

Sometimes, a picture says it all.  After a meek 4th and 14 capitulation, GB churned out first down after first down, bleeding the clock completely dry.  As they say in Lesser Footy commentary – a professional job, done.  32-18, and the NFC title runs through Lambeau fo sho. [Troof. Legitimately afraid of them in the Super Bowl]

Which leaves us with a Ratbirds invasion of WNY.  Pray for Rev. Mayhem’s liver. [Joke’s on you. I went with wings and ether- aka the North Tonawanda Twister]

First half…again, played against expectations.  By being a mutual derp-fest. [Yeah, a bit]  The placement kickers went a combined 2-for-5 (including back-to-back doinks – Hail Sha(‘)nk(‘)hor – by DFO’s second-favoUrite serial kicker, Justin Tucker), and that’s all the scoring we got.  3-3, but with Lamar! looking like maybe he had his mojo back on the final Q2 drive.

But BUF started Q3 with a 7-minute TD drive, and BAL countered with the same…except that Lamar!’s 3rd and goal TD pass…went the other way.  [WOOOOOOOOOOOO! 101 YARDS!] Give the Bills Mafia defense credit – they shut down the Ratbirds run game cold, and turned Lamar! into a pocket passer.  Then knocked him out of the game.  And it was Brokeback [Josh Fuckin’ Allen] who had the 2nd half mojo.  Stefon Diggs was pretty much unstoppable, too.  [DIGGSTOWN, BITCHES!] One expects a massive test in KC next weekend, but #ThePauls have defied expectations plenty this season. [I am…cautiously optimistic either way] Anyway, this fucker ended 17-3.  Tyler Huntley did look better than he had any plausible reason to, so there’s a BAL positive. [Troof II: Cruise Contol]

Enjoy this morning’s fine sampler of Lesser Footy (Knifey v Spurs, 9a on NBCSN, followed by Peacock doubleheader that I will have access to, but likely not watch), but nap strategically.  We starts like 90 minutes earlier on Divisional Sunday.

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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bk109

Btw, isn’t it time for one of you fine deep cover Illuminati Ancient Alien Lizards to kickstart the first game thread?

scotchnaut

It’s called “the refresh button”.

bk109

Good attempt at deflection there, but it wasn’t there when I asked… And I have all the proof I can fake to prove it! 😀
Edit: So, now tell us – as a confirmed Deep State operative, can you tell us why… WHY is there fuck all good on telly of late?! HMMMM!?!??

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
BrettFavresColonoscopy

If I’d known the game was starting so late I would have kept hibernating

TheRevanchist

I’m wrapping things up and trying not to miss my team taking the Browns, putting them in a brown paper bag, lighting said paper bag on fire on someone’s porch, ringing the doorbell, and running away before the person answers said doorbell.

The person that doorbell belongs to: Baker Mayfield.

Dunstan

I didn’t know the stadium he lives in had a doorbell and a porch!

bk109

Funny, this kinda reminds me of a couple of things the Yinzers were saying last week…

bk109

Btw, any suggestions for naming the two puppies (in case someone’s wondering they’re a Tevuren/Groenendael mix) ? One is almost certainly gonna be called Wal (for Wallonia), but the other’s still TBA

bk109

Why would one want a cat, let alone more than one? :p

bk109

Only good use for a cat is as a silencer

bk109

You shouldn’t worry about the tanks – they’re totally demilitirized (plus, 125mm ammo isn’t exactly easy to buy) … the .40S&W on my hip, the other stuff in the cabinet OR my

Gumbygirl

My boy has a middle initial. Meet Henry J.

Resized_20210116_154231.jpeg
Dunstan

If you’re going to call one “Wal,” why not go with Waldorf and Statler?

bk109

Don’t get the reference and I do kinda want something Belgium-related to reflect their breed 😀

Game Time Decision

Its a “Muppets” reference. They are the grumpy old men in the balcony

bk109

Ah, that’d explain it – I’ve never watched the muppets as a kid, nor did my kids ever get interested in them

Doktor Zymm

The obvious would be Flanders

bk109

Yeah, that’s my standby – that or “Dale” for Passchendaele (both the song and the battle)

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Duchesse?

Doktor Zymm

Wasn’t Hercule Poirot Belgian? Is either of the puppies a fictional detective?

bk109

And we have a winner, Hercule fits well! (Especially given that I’m currently watching the pup sniffing around my desk looking for clues where I hid the beef jerky 😀

Brick Meathook

Fido

Viva La Tabula Raza

Fideaux

TheRevanchist

It’s a dog so you can have fun with the name.

Beaker
Tank
Coach
Bailey Jay

Whatever name gives you comfort.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

And all those names work whether the dog is a boy or a girl

Game Time Decision

Doggy McDogFace

Obvs

Viva La Tabula Raza

If they’re siblings, maybe Wallachia? Of course, their shortened nicknames would be the same so it might generate confusion. Also, wrong end of Europe. Never mind.

Last edited 3 years ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
litre_cola

Kremlin critic Alexei Navalny has been detained by Russian police at passport control after flying back to Russia from Germany for the first time since being poisoned last summer, Reuters reports.

Vladdy does not fuck around.

bk109

And nothing of value was lost, because Navalny’s a literal non-entity (in the grand scheme of things) in Russia, despite his valiantly retarded antics. Seriously, the biggest proof one can see that it wasn’t Ole Vlad trying to kill that joker is that he’s still breathing, lol unlike… Litvinenko (lead coffin) or Nemtsov (gunned down in front of the Kremlin). In fact, the only person with something to gain with this alleged poisoning was Navalny himself (aka basically pulling a slightly less bitchboi version of the Jussie Smollett maneuver)

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
litre_cola

All very true. Like you said if Vlad wanted him dead, he would be dead.

bk109

Yep, I’m not saying Vlad and the Flunky Bunch aren’t capable of killing someone, quite the opposite in fact. I’m just saying that it doesn’t fit, because Russians are a bit more pragmatic than what people assume and don’t kill just for the evulz.
ie – Litvinenko (and the way he was killed) fit rather well, because it wasn’t just the fact that they removed a threat, they did it in a way to send a message that you don’t fuck with Russia/Putin unless you want to risk dying in a world of hurt and in a way that can’t be stopped by even world-class doctors
Nemtsov – quite the same – threat gone AND in a way to warn that “nowhere is safe and not even billions can save your arse”
Also, both are done in a way that’s attributable to the Kremlin, but afaik nothing’s been actually concretely proven (because of the methods used)
Otoh – Skripal and Navalny? Doesn’t fit, ’cause the utility of killing either isn’t there, it’s done in a method that’s inconsistent (and traceable as fuck) back to Russia and especially the former is literally pointless as you gained fuck all by a successful hit, but risked significant blowback if you fucked up

Ironically, one the most effective ways to off Navalny (who was flying at the time) ironically would’ve been a syringe full of air, which’d have thrown a bloodclot (an actual know problem when flying) and given that Shirtless Vlad’s tight control of the country, a coroner would’ve conveniently missed the injection mark and … voillez “natural causes” that don’t show up on a toxicology screen 😀

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
Gumbygirl

Significant blowback from Trump?

bk109

Trump has other problems… like finding a non-extradition country’s embassy willing to take his calls 😀
In fact, I’m pretty sure that the West in general will whinge for a bit (to save face), but do fuckall else, ’cause Navalny was causing them more headaches in Germany than in lockup in Russia (if anything, he’s actually worth more as a very much ded martyr than as a opposition leader)

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
Gumbygirl

I read that New York is going to lay 67 felony charges on his dumb ass on Thursday. Let it be so!

bk109

That’s why I’ve got a bet going with the wife that he’s actually gonna bolt early and actually no-show the inauguration 😀 We’ve also got a side bet on where he’d land (I’ve taken the Phillipines and North Korea), she assumes Saudis or UAE (basically the “Idi Amin” package) 😀

Gumbygirl

Kingdom of Saud. They like flashy tacky gold stuff, just like him.

bk109

More trouble than it’s worth for them, plus unlike Idi Amin, he can’t actually pay cash for the service 😀

rockingdog

found a funny:

billionaire: we’re all in this together

everyone: you lost money too?

billionaire: haha no i am somehow richer

Brick Meathook
Viva La Tabula Raza

Head coach Jets, Robert Saleh. First Muslim HC ever.

Dunstan

I dunno, there’s a questionable history of Muslims with Jets in New York.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Banner-worthy?

bk109

Too soon for that, tbh

Btw, speaking of Jets and New York, I was talking to an architect buddy of mine about the twin towers’s design … and when I send him this pick \/ , he almost shat a brick
comment image

In case someone is wondering, a building shouldn’t be nearly as see-through as this

Doktor Zymm

That’s not from construction??

bk109

After construction, before the lightweight partitioning for the floorspace got installed from what I’ve heard. These lads (and scottish-muslim, transsexual engineer-o-lawyer… not being sarcastic, she self-identifies as such) made for a better explanation:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f7Qop_64qqk

I’ll copy a rather apt description from reddit about the tower’s construction and from the vid I linked to, they pointed out how little margin for error (or extra loads) those lightweight floors had so much so, that when the building started falling – the outer walls remained intact for a bit, all the while floors were pancaking

And there lies the flaw that brought the towers down – their huge, sprawling floor spaces. The towers were made with a central strong core reinforced only by the concrete exterior. Breaking that exterior weakened the building immensely, and once one part failed there was not enough redundant support and the whole thing failed catastrophically.

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
Brick Meathook

There was no concrete exterior anywhere. It was all steel, and (relatively) lightweight.

bk109

Yup and given the questionable quality of the fire-retardant coating on the steel frame (also covered in that YT clip I linked to), it’s a bloody miracle the buildings lasted that long. What I don’t get is why no one ever considered outfitting the buildings with helipads for evacuating people post ’93, where the risks of having one (imho) were vastly outweighed by the potential utility (just imagine what good even a couple of CH-53’s outta McGuire-Dix-Lakehurst could’ve done

Don T

And fury
comment image

bk109

lol, only thing Navalny shows is how retarded the West is when it comes to picking its “partners” in Russia and also how little critical thinking happens in the Western mind, when the classic “OHNO, it’s the Russkies” mindset gets into play 😀
Edit: Here are a couple of questions no one seems to’ve asked nor answered with regards to this alleged poisoning

  1. If it happened at all, why would the Russians allow this guy safe passage to Germany, where his bloodwork would show shit be wrong?
  2. If they wanted to kill him with poison, why would they pick basically the only one that spells with big neon-lit letters “WE DID IT” ?
  3. If they wanted to kill such a non-entity, why would they risk something as ineffective as the Schroedinger’s poison that’s Novichok (It’s amusing as fuck how one poison can be both one of the worst things since Jedward! and yet conveniently doesn’t kill its actual targets) and not just whack him? After all, “crime” is bad enough in Russia, that that Putin critic got killed in full view of the Kremlin…
Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
bk109

Heh, I actually missed this in the BBC article which illustrates one of my points:

In December, Mr Putin argued that Alexei Navalny was a nobody and anyway, he actually laughed, if Russian security forces had wanted him dead, they’d have finished the job.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Needs more fury.

Doktor Zymm

Man, I walked a lot and drank a lot yesterday (nawt simultaneously). That was the first time this year I’ve been properly drunk, so very considerate of Ballsitchmore to play like poop while I was sleepies after walking back to the hotel. Now have coffee and french toast, but not drinking during today’s bouts as I’m headed up Mauna Kea tonight

Doktor Zymm

Mmm, coconut syrup is very coconutty

ballsofsteelandfury

You are up very early on vacation!

Doktor Zymm

I’m trying to roughly stay on west coast time, plus the morning is a good time to do outdoors stuff!

rockingdog

Wut
comment image

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I’m more concerned about the nipple placement

Viva La Tabula Raza

Squint your eyes and he looks like a fat Hitler.comment image?width=1200&height=645

Gumbygirl

He has crazy eyes. They should probably dig up his basement.

Gumbygirl

Stryper, that’s a good one!

Brick Meathook

If you enjoyed the video from last night of the BMW engine being assembled by robots with rarely a human in sight, Mercedes AMG takes the complete opposite approach:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vx0UHvkR_qY

bk109

Looks impressive, clean and efficient, doesn’t it? … Too bad that they neglect to show how dirty and unhealthy the inital casting process actually is (unfortunately I’ve seen behind the curtain at a couple of Linamar factories and it’s about as ugly as a wonky Kebab places’ kitchen)

Luckily (for VAG), that doesn’t stop me from buying their stuff… Then again, if me doing my own maintenance on the 4.2 V8’s engine hasn’t stopped me, nothing bloodywill 😀comment image

Viva La Tabula Raza

I’ve rebuilt a number of small block and big block Chevy V-8s, as well as a number of VW flat fours, but not in over 20 years. I just can’t comprehend the complexity of these newer engines.

bk109

I can help with that – basically imagine your worst mechanical nightmare (lots of moving parts and with zilch in terms of margin for error) …and add enough electronics everywhere to make even the smallest tasks a real :bleep:er 😀

Still better than the W12, which is basically 2 V6 only slightly less complex than ^ glued together and driving a single shaft 😀

Viva La Tabula Raza

When I look at that stuff, I imagine it’s like what Otto Lilienthal would think when presented with a Pratt & Whitney J75 or a Saturn booster.

bk109

Given that both are actually closer to his time than to ours, I bet that he’d go with “Nice, and what did you do the next 70 years?” 😀
Btw, it’s amusing how it took humanity less time to go fromcomment image

to
comment image

than it took for the latter to finally leave active service (it got retired in 2020 by the JASDF, but it’s still flying strong with the Greek, Turks, ROK and Iran)

ballsofsteelandfury

It only has a winglet on one side in the rear??

bk109

… uh, no, it has symmetrical tailplanes if that’s what yer asking, it’s just the perspective. But as this is the F-4 Phantom II, aerodynamics would probably be unaffected in the slightest (as this plane’s jokingly referred as the proof that big enough engines make anything fly well :D)
comment image

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s one hell of a perspective. I can’t see the other one and the angle looks extremely weird. It makes sense it should have two, though.

bk109

It helps that they’re relatively small and canted, so what it can be way easier to obscure by a small perspective shift 😉

bk109

Unrelated – the neighbours down the road were giving away some puppies, so … when do you mad lads reckon I should tell my wife that we have 2 more dogs?

BrettFavresColonoscopy

After flowers and breakfast in bed?

bk109

It should be fine, especially as we already have 4 already… Well, “we” only when it comes to playing with them, but when it comes time to walking them or other less than pleasant activities – wifey and the kiddos disappear faster than flight logs to Epstein island 😀 Oh well, for the time being – I’m gonna bank on no one noticing the 2 belgian shepherd mix puppies, while working on plan b 😀

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
bk109

Six, with the smallest being a black lab, everything else be bigger 🙂 All are great with children (and up to and including tolerating the kiddos riding them like ponies at one point), but are quite protective when there are strangers (to them in the house) – no growling or barring of teeth, but I’ve noticed that they always stay nearby and somewhat tense (but lighten up after awhile, when they “confirm” that there’s no threat) … Basically the ultimate babysitters 😀

scotchnaut

You Have Been Forewarned: There will be a lovely “Sleeping with Bieniemy” pun in the first game intro.

litre_cola

Droppin Deci off at my folks who sadly move back to the cabin in 3 weeks, anywhoo let’s gooooooo!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jW8UlrtcEac

bk109

… Let’s goo, yet you post a White Stripes song, so talk about mixed signals :p

litre_cola

The only tune of theirs I enjoy. Although I would have a go at Meg!

bk109

Well, you’re certainly entitled to yer (questionable) tastes :p

litre_cola

Mormon Hill nawt playin today. I believe makes New Orleans better. He just fucks up everything. I do not understand why Payton continues to soak with this guy.

litre_cola

BRING OUT CRAB LEGS TO BEAT BRADY. Brees out for the season and we get a Baker Mayfield Jameis SUperb Owl. Make it so 2021!

Don T

My brain rejects a State Farm Superb Owl. Or maybe would kill my last actuarial science horcrux.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Maybe they can get Jake from State Farm to do the coin toss.

scotchnaut
bk109

And yet Ottawa Ottawa’d as usual…

Also

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fi6oMbIylL0

bk109

… no true Quebecois would ever call herself an Ottawan 😀

litre_cola

Fact.

bk109

By the way, the only thing less likely one may hear from yer Frenchies (or all Canuckistani for that matter) is probably

I am so fucking glad the Nordiques fucked off to Denver!

litre_cola

I am an Alouettes fan is a rarity as well….

bk109

Please tell me you mean the Hornet squadron and not CFL team…

Speaking of the Nordiques:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_POD5IbT9vQ

bk109

On a completely separate subject – fuck the French language… It’s not hard, damn it – just spell shit phonetically (or at least close enough) like real fucking language groups.
Translation:All my life, I thought Arsene Lupin’s name is pronounced similarly to “Le Pen”

bk109

German or the Slavic languages, actually, if going by pronounciation, but no – I don’t mind the French language (or the French for that matter… Even, or rather ESPECIALLY the Quebecois), but the spelling is migraine inducing

bk109

You sure she wasn’t just arrogant as shit? After all, Quebecois can’t be a tad less humble than most 😀
Edit: Btw, you can at least give other languages a try, especially if you’re attaching it to another hobby that drives yer interest (aka basically how I taught myself Russian and conversational Swedish)

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
bk109

Yeah, that’s definitely racist as shit. Now, if she’d just said the poors or “the bad part”, that’d okay (well,as okay as class-ism and arrogance can be, but we’re grading on a curve here), but not when dropping the hard N-word

litre_cola

The pronouns and masculine feminine issue has always triggered me in French, I am completely fluent but a far better speaker and reader than writer which is 100% due to lack of practice.I will not bitch as I hear from Mrs. Cola that Germany has 3 gender markers!
Das ist nicht gut!

Last edited 3 years ago by litre_cola
bk109

3 gender markers, that can and will change (both themselves AND the noun/adj. they refer to) when Dativ, Genitiv and the gang come into play :p

Doktor Zymm

There’s actually a correlation between the use of genders in a language and sexism. Languages like English, where gender exists but is not interwoven into the entire language, do better than both languages where it’s an integral part of every word, which do the worst, and languages where it doesn’t exist at all!

Gumbygirl

No kidding. My pencil is a girl, but my pen is a boy?
Wrong. I don’t have a penis!

bk109

HOW DARE YOU PRESUME A PEN’S PREFFERED PRONOUNCED?! By the powers vested in me by noone in particular, you’re hereby cancelled for 2 consecutive nanoseconds!

Gumbygirl

I’m back!

Don T

Only the best languages spell phonetically.
-Colonel Obvious

bk109

Shouldn’t that be Coronel Obvio?

bk109

…who ded? Also, don’t worry – Everton will too grow up to be a real football team hated across the world… eventually? :p

bk109

Ah, definitely just performed/covered it for the mouthbreathers. The song itself (especially in its original variant) is from Rodgers and Hammerstein’s Carousel (yes, the same lads that did the |King and I” and “The Sound of Music”)

bk109

… right, burn in hell because a song from a rather decent show* was co-opted by the fanbase of the one true Liverpool team:D When Sheffield can field two good teams bearing its name, you start asking yourself why only one team is deemed fit to carry the (allegedly) proud name o’ Liverpool, whereas the other has to carry the name of a borough where it never actually played (that just came up on a football trivia show, lol – apparently Everton was only based in Anfield and Walton 😀
*edit: I realized that I know a bit more about musical theatre than the norm, which means that wifey’s attempts to bludgeon some culture in me is working

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
bk109

Oh, cry me a bloody river.. at least you didn’t see one of the best romantic comedies of all time (that also featured rather prominently Arsenal) get remade with such a fucking unlikeable turn by Jimmy Fallon, that it almost made me hate the Sox!
Also, pointing out that Liverpool are the younger,hip-er of the teams doesn’t help yer case, especially when they beat you lot by every metric – including the amount (and severity) of stadium disasters 😛

litre_cola

It is far better to support a nothing club that is a great day out to go to the stadium and in a fun neighboUrhood. Right? Right?

/gets relegated again.

bk109

Ah, but it’s even moar’n’BETTAR fun (especially when you’re sitting 10th-ish in the league table) to prod supporters of a club with a serious “little brother” complex, while waiting for your roast to marinade 😀

bk109

So what? This just means that we can’t be bounced/underperform in Europe if we’re not IN Europe!
Check’n’ma…I’m gonna go cry under the shower for a bit, brb

litre_cola

Legit best day of my sporting life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8yaqH4MLT80

bk109

I WAS THERE! (well, for the first leg in Torino) Twas great, especially the part where I spent half the evening in a police station after the game (fixing a computer snafu and drinking wine) 😀

litre_cola

Amazing!!!! I have been an FFC supporter since my 1st match there in 2003. Hooked for life.

bk109

For me it was love at first FIFA98 – one look at the crest with a cannon and it’s been lovely misery ever after 😀

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
Don T

I fell asleep during the 2nd QRT of BAL @ BUF. Man, my whole day turned out opposite than intended.

-had to field a ? PHONE CALL

-my “No human contact” weekend expectation shot, I left the house to buy beer

-beer + enchiladas > Ambien

Just watched the rest of the game. Won’t say anything about Lamar! ‘cause it will sound either meaner than intended or waaaay condescending. Anyway, Harbaugh is out of the dance. Happy, happy days ahead.

Fronkenshteen

With apologies to Rev, they’re a feel good team for now, but Buffalo being great again is going to become annoying really quickly.

bk109

Well, it’s gonna be a riot one way or another, only difference is whether it’ll be angry drunk’n’ slurrin’ or happy slurrin’ when people get arrested 😀