Formally Week One FOAR JV NFL (Thursday Night Open Thread)

Is everybody ready for some NIL-fueled FITBAW??  I fuckin’ thought so.

West By God Virginia (+7.5) at Pittsburgh (7:00, ESPN)

A great (read: hate-filled) rivalry gets re-ignited.  Suffer along with WCS, not sure anyone in the Clubhouse has positive fee-fees for JV Yinzers?  Anyway, this is way too many points.  Fuckers du Cousins has a quartered back this year, and that will make all the difference.

Central Michigan (+21.5) at BDSM State (7:00, FS1)

The orange paddles will be out for our MACtion heroes, and I have a weird notion that we could see a competitive matchup here.  Or maybe I am just rationalizing again.  FUCK YOU, I support NC State AND Everton, defense mechanisms are all that keep me alive.

Paedo State (-3.5) at Purdue (8:00, Fox)

Man, an opening week road favoUrite in West Lafayette?  Homey don’t play that.  Purdue Pete brings back quite a bit, at least on offense, and they’ll be jacked up as fuck.  You have to imagine that every B1G coach hates James Franklin with a white-hot passion.  Much like Josh McDaniels, he just oozes “that guy” vibes.

Louisiana Tech (+20) at Missouri (8:00, ESPNU)

Just in case you need a 4th fixture, Louisiana Tech can be a meddlesome foe, even against much stronger programs than Mizzourah.  I’d be sad to see Eli Drinkwitz catch the express train to Sackville, but that’s life in the SEC for ya.  It just means MOAR, rite??