![[DOOR FLIES OPEN]](https://doorfliesopen.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/DFO-MC-Patch.png)
"This site goes down so often we oughta change the name to “Dating Nancy Reagan”" – Horatio
Hey guys, we’re starting to get some new faces (that are really old faces but WHATEVER) and I thought it was a good time to open up the old suggestion box. If you have any ideas on site changes or things that we can do to improve things, on the front or the backend, let me know. No idea is too stupid.
So now that DFO has been up and running on its own and is about to spend its second night in the world on its own two legs, I have a suggestion and a question:
Question: Rivebrogs? Here or KSK? If here, how? Is there a super sexy format that you wizards of WordPress will reveal once we have earned it or should we return to the den of the hungry Post Eater? We could do some weird grape-like clustering of Balls GoTo meeting and see the sad truth of what I really look like watching a game but I think that ends poorly mutually for all parties involved.
Suggestion: As we get our legs under us and get a sense of how we use it, is there a way to set up an ongoing “suggestions” page that seems more active rather than potentially relegated due to the age of this post? I literally have no idea how paged work for WP so it may be moot.
*But if there are pages and they may work in the magical way I think they could, my years of wet dreams for a KSK-hockey clone could finally come to fruition!
We’ll experiment with a lot of this stuff as we get closer to the season – I’d like to get the commenting system a little bit more streamlined. I like the permanent “Suggestions Box” idea – I’ll implement that when I get some time this weekend.
Also, if you want to get the domain, I’ll make you a site like this one for Hockey, or you can post all of your hockey musings here – I gave you editor privilege. I’m thinking about making a tutorial video to show you guys how to post – some folks have it down, some could use a tutorial I believe.
You should definitely do a regular hockey column! We have enough fans here to support it.
Couple suggestions. I would like it if the author’s name appeared with the title. You know, just in case Sugar shows up over here.
Also, maybe we should have WordPress Sports cross-post their articles to this site. That sounds like an idea that could only have positive outcomes, right?
Maybe we could do a roster list of the contributors and a quick bio.
Example: yeah right, lives in LA on the beach, favorite NFL team Vikings, Hobbies/interests include cooking, music, fucktardery, drinking, guitar, walking for fitness, reading and travel.
Likes smokin’ hot naked Asian girls and alcohol.
Dislikes: trolls and disfunctional insecure actresses.
A fine idea; I’ve added a second sheet to the voting spreadsheet for those kinds of details.
Voting Time?
I put together a spreadsheet so we can winnow down our future name choices into voteable options. Here’s how I’m proposing it work:
Once everyone has had a chance to fill it out I’ll tally up the votes and pick our top 5 to vote on, which we’ll do probably by an instant runoff process.
ALSO: As suggested by Yeah Right, there’s a second page for personal details.
I think I got it.
This is like algebra.
Yep, looks good! I probably could have made my instructions a lot more concise.
We could try another poll once we get to the top 5 but it didn’t quite work for everyone. FYI, I already bought footballtothegroin.com so I’ll at least redirect that here.
I think I did it right. I also added a row for Football TO the Groin since Darkest Timeline Zach Morris bought it.
Finished! I can only figure out how to Komment using my Google+ account, which only works intermittently. But I enjoy being a hit or miss part of this insurrectionist venture.
yarp voted
This was your weirdest puzzle yet, but I think I solved it. Turns out make it snow is actually Patton Oswalt!
man you spoiled it for me
I voted. YYAAAYYYYYYYY!
Twice, it looks like.
Done and done. How is We All Float Down Here not already owned by Philip Rivers?
Voted!
Made my choices.
Let me write about beer. I’ll change my name to DaBeerDad or TheTruthAboutBeer. Review format will be:
Where I bought the beer (Vons or Bevmo)
Is it memorable?
How bad are my allergies (bad)
Is this RODGER Rodger?
Oh how I miss BevMo.
I may try a regular feature here if one of you gentlemen would be goodly enough to tell me how to post. I’m thinking about resurrecting one of the regular features on my dearly departed blog that I miss but don’t have time for.
By all means. I need a late night interlocutor.
Yes! That would be great!
nomoreottobutwestillgetblotto.edu
I’ve been thinking of doing a feature, tentative name “Bottle Share”.
Anyway I was originally thinking of doing a transcript of myself drinking a bottle of wine, or another time drinking a couple of bombers of craft beef, or a bottle of bourbon…
Can we set up a time and date where several or all of us can do a live blog with the beverages of our choice?
Say Saturdays at 4:00 PM PST. 7:00 to you East coasters.
I like the concept of documenting the drunken festivities glass by glass.
If we can combine this with Women’s World Cup soccer, even better!
We are all watching and just cheering lecherously for the hotter teams, right?
@King Hippo – Go Norway!
This sounds like alot of fun.
Suggestion: my wireless router had its firmware corrupted and refused to work for me for the past two days. This is primarily due to the fact that my Apple laptop does not have a built-in ethernet port–yeah, fuck you, dicks. Since I have Prime and needed something else anyway, I got a usb ethernet dongle. It shipped UPS and arrived in Portland sometime Tuesday afternoon. It was in Portland for 24 hours before… UPS handed it off to the Post Office. Not me. Yeah. So then the dongle finally got in my hands today (I should have just sucked it up and went to a damn store, yeah, yeah, yeah), and after wrangling with some tech bullshit, I FINALLY re-entered the modern world and have home internet again so I can get back to the plans I had here.
Anyway, my suggestion is that we need a better stocked bar. 1/3rd of a bottle of Old Grand Dad and an open packet of saltines is just not enough.
Good show! 
Listen, I’m tired of you and New School Zero drinking up all the booze. You tell that shiftless asswipe to get a job and get out of my basement.
I recommend fumigating. That tends to keep him away for a good while. That or just put a large dog crate near the couch. That tends to give him flashbacks to the breeding pens, and he’ll start to avoid those areas.
I, however, refuse to stop drinking the booze. I’ve written the cocktail bits so far! IT’S FOR THE SITE!
Life rule #1.
Never let go of your dongle.
The Uproxx Monster is eating komments today. Intrepid Spaniel Stigg had a nice one on the Depressing Banners post, then SOS just lost a couple good ones on the pizza delivery post. Don’t know if it’s glitches or editorial decisions.
My guess is glitches, because it actually ate a +1 that I gave.
ALSO MONTY THIS SEEMS STRANGE TO ME IS THE GREATEST KOMMENTER EVER
HOLY SHIT I CAN EDIT OTHER PEOPLE’S COMMENTS. I’M MOAR GOD THAN DTZM but I’m just not quite as smart or handsome
Yeah, we can all do that, actually. I made all of you jackasses administrators, because I’m too lazy to go through and approve all of your crap. Please don’t make me regret it, I’m going to bust you all down to private if we make a real site out of this nonsense.
This was happening on FilmDrunk last week too. Specifically the post *where Kevin Smith showed up.
*where
It’s been a long day.
We can edit posts here, Sep.
Or, at least, I can. Maybe I’m GOD
If you are then please disregard whatever it was you think you saw me doing last night.
Oh, and a couple of choice phrases you thought you heard earlier today.
I always forget the edit button is there because it blends in with the timestamp.
Can someone tell me how to edit please? I can’t find the button.
Yeah, I’m pretty sure the issue is with Uproxx’s comment system backend – I’ve been getting emails for komment replies that are over a day behind real-time.
Stupid piece of shit ate my Nate Burleson pizza joke.
Btw, if the need ever arises for us all to have a conference call or something like that, I have a GoToMeeting account from work that we can use. It allows up to 6 webcams (may or may not be a good idea) and you can view others’ computer screens. We may never end up using it, but I thought I’d throw it out there, just in case.
That’s Great Hustle
Ass Slaps All Around
Disgruntled Kommenters
KastAways
Oh, let’s get some kind of email list set up.
This is a good one because when you guys originally included me in the email thread, I could not match up the KSK names with the email addresses.
I wish make it snow would write more.
Don’t we all?
Seconded.
Concur.
I wish make it snow would write something funny once.
how do i unapprove this
I wish there was some way to incentivize him being funny. Like, give him certificates of participation or something. Stickers? Grape Job? Gold Stars?
I have a couple suggestions
1. To the people who have joined recently, I repeat my request for your Twitter user names, if you’re willing to share. Mine is @MontyStrange
2. If your name/avatar here doesn’t match your name/avatar on KSK, let us know who you are. I like to put the pieces together. Like a puzzle. I like puzzles. I like turtles.
My Twitter username is, creatively, my actual name: @frankspring. I just followed a handful of you and look forward to the retweeted dick jokes.
Not to disparage the current name, but with some talk of actually going to our own URL, maybe having our own name would be worth discussing. Something of our own design that still pays homage to our KSK roots, like “We All Float Down Here” except, you know, clever and good.
Big Dumb Football Idiots (we’d need to get Roger on board, though, since I think he came up with that one)
Going Deep
Door Flies Open
Sexbag.com (what do you mean that one’s taken? [ed. note–I haven’t checked])
The Starter Life
Falco Punch
flubby.com [ed. note–I’m not gonna search for that one, either]
La Homo Nostra
I’d like to cast my vote for Door Flies Open, a literary* subtype that I think captures the spirit of sophomoric absurdity, adolescent wish-fulfillment, and gratuitous gaucherie that animates both this ludicrous enterprise and the Founding Dick Jokers.
*Only in the most technical sense, and probably not even that.
Door Flies Open works.
I was thinking this as well. Maybe:
Football Dick Jokes
No Nats Allowed
Amateur Football Talk
Anton Lubchenko’s Leg
Football In the Groin
If we like Fooball In the Groin at all, may I suggest a logo?
OK, footballinthegroin.com was taken. We do now own footballtothegroin.com though.
Honestly, we just have to wait for Gronk to do something. The name will reveal itself.
YoSoyFiesta.com?
RFDs Birthday Party
Worse Than Hitler
Jeff Baca Is A Christmas Ham
Whatever Happened To Otto
Janay Rice Apologizes For This Site
Trent Green Purple Monkey Dishwasher
Trent Green Purple Monkey Dishwasher made me laugh uncontrollably.
We should seriously name and recognize an Otto Day. I don’t propose this entire site become a series of inside jokes about KSK – actually, I’d say it’s doing very well generating its own voice and style – but proper recognition and celebration of the people who made KSK what it was strikes me as both appropriate and the sort of thing that will give us the sexy, irresistible sheen of obsessiveness and veneration so common in celebrated enterprises like death cults and Politburos.
March 18th was Otto’s last post. That would be my vote for the Otto Man/MIA kommenter day.
And I’m all for this becoming a death cult. That would just be one more item off my bucket list.
Does anyone have any contact info for Otto? We’re not exactly putting up a beacon here, and I’d love to see him.
You can try DM’ing him via Uproxx.
I’m still kind of expecting him to show up during preseason like nothing ever happened.
You mean like Tiki Barber tried to do with the Giants?
I dropped Otto a line at Uproxx.
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