Thank you, scheduling dicks of the CFL, for spreading out games over four days this week instead of giving me the doubleheaders I so desperately crave. When a game ends at like 9 or 9:30 EST, what the fuck are you supposed to do? Get drunk to SportsCentre? Absolutely not. That’s just fucking sad. At least have poker or darts or NASCAR on or something – I don’t want to drink myself to the same canned bullshit that loops on repeat for four hours nonstop. Enough digression for now!

WEEK 3 RECAPS

Winnipeg 28 vs. Hamilton 24: The Tiger-Cats couldn’t get much going on offence in the first half, and it came back to bite them. Despite a Brandon Banks 121-yard kick return for a touchdown in the first quarter, Winnipeg was controlling play for much of the game, and Drew Willy had a solid outing once again, going 32-42 for 279 yards and a touchdown. Hamilton’s current starter Jeremiah Masoli had yet another mixed bag of a night, throwing two TDs in the 2nd half to Andy Fantuz and Chad Owens to make it a close game, but Tiquan Underwood dropped what would’ve been the winning TD and Masoli threw his second pick of the night on the very next play (the first was a touchdown returned by CB Maurice Leggett). You can bet Hamilton fans are anxious as hell for the return of Zach Collaros under centre, and fortunately for them, he was just removed this week from the 6-game DL and has recently started practising again, but no return date is scheduled as of yet.

Also, this game gave us a total Madden glitch of a touchdown pass from Drew Willy to Ryan Smith, which is one of the most bonkers football highlights I think I’ve ever seen.

PICK: Hamilton

RESULT: Winnipeg

Toronto 25 vs. BC 14: The Lions lost their first game this season due in part to a great night from Argos K Lirim Hajrullahu, who nailed six field goals to cement the win for Toronto. BC was forced to start Anthony Allen at RB in place of an injured Jeremiah Johnson, but he had a good night filling in with 107 yards on 16 carries. At the end of the day, the Argos played a very strong defensive game, which stifled much of BC’s rhythm and recorded four turnovers and four sacks on the night. Brandon Whitaker had a strong night moving the chains for the Argos, with 13 rushes for 97 yards, and Toronto’s Tori Gurley led all receivers in the game with 5 catches for 97 yards and the game’s only touchdown.

PICK: BC

RESULT: Toronto

Calgary 26 vs. Ottawa 26: the first tie since 2009 in the CFL, and fuck me, I think I’m madder about this than I would be a loss. Both Ottawa and Calgary had multiple chances to win this game – a Trevor Harris red zone pick, a couple missed field goals from Chris Milo, a fumble on the 1-yard line for new RB Nic Grigsby, and a dropped interception from DB Jermaine Robinson all could’ve won it for Ottawa, while Calgary had a chance with a deflected pass in OT as well as a few stalled drives earlier in the game. All the same, the Trevor Harris to Chris Williams dynamic is unstoppable right now – Williams had 3 TDs on the night and continues to race ahead of the field in league leaders in reception yards and touchdowns too.

PICK: Ottawa

RESULT: Tie

Saskatchewan 36 vs. Edmonton 39 (OT): Adarius Bowman and Mike Reilly led the way in yet another overtime thriller for the Eskimos. QB Reilly threw for 336 yards and 4 TDs, 3 of which landed in the hands of Bowman, who finished with 141 yards on 6 catches. While Stampeders fans are probably miffed at the result of the game, there’s no denying that the team still looked very good, and despite starting the season 0-2, have plenty of time to turn their fortunes around. The game was back and forth all night – Saskatchewan had an early 13-0 lead, which was cut to 19-14 at halftime; by the 3rd, Edmonton had taken the lead instead. Saskatchewan regained the lead with 19 seconds left in the game on a touchdown from Darian Durant to Shamawd Chambers, going up 36-33. Edmonton scored a field goal as time expired to send it to OT, where Sean Whyte added another field goal and the defence stood tall to win it for Edmonton. Score aside, Saskatchewan’s D looked very good for some stretches, and the magic for the Roughriders to turn their season around will just be a little more consistency as this team continues to gel.

PICK: Edmonton

RESULT: Edmonton

WEEK 4 PREVIEWS

Ottawa (2-0-1) vs. Toronto (2-1), Wednesday, July 13th, 7:30 PM EST: Winner gets first place in the East Division! Ottawa’s biggest job is going to be protecting the ball – Toronto’s D forced 4 turnovers and 4 sacks against BC and DE Shawn Lemon, an integral part of the REDBLACKS’ march to the Grey Cup final last year, is a force to be reckoned with for the Argos. Toronto went 3-0 last year against Ottawa, and despite the REDBLACKS being favoured in this game, Scott Milanovich has so far had Rick Campbell’s number in their head-to-head matchups. All that said, Ottawa’s offence remains the most potent in the league – even if the Argos end double-teaming Chris Williams everywhere he goes, all of Trevor Harris’ other weapons are healthy and effective right now – Brad Sinopoli, Ernest Jackson and Greg Ellingson all play like #1 receivers on a team chock-full of offensive talent. Some more added incentive for the REDBLACKS: it’s Trevor Harris’ first game back in Toronto since he left the team in free agency to sign in Ottawa.

PICK: Ottawa

Edmonton (1-1) vs. Winnipeg (1-2), Thursday, July 14th, 8:30 PM EST: While it’s true that Edmonton’s defense isn’t what it was in seasons previous, their offense is potent enough that it should hopefully take care of any shortcomings the D may have. Winnipeg and Edmonton are similar teams, in that regard, as Drew Willy is the lynchpin for the Bombers, but Edmonton has far more threats on the offensive side than what Willy has to work with, and the Bombers’ D is pretty atrocious. Edmonton should likely take this one, especially if Reilly and Bowman click like they did against Saskatchewan.

PICK: Edmonton

Hamilton (1-2) vs. Montreal (1-1), Friday, July 15th, 7:30 PM EST: Hamilton is in free-fall, while Montreal is coming off a bye week. The Alouettes will be without receivers SJ Green (torn ACL, MCL, PCL and meniscus, done for the year) and Duron Carter (suspension) for this game, but still have some weapons available in Nik Lewis, Sam Giguere and Kenny Stafford, as well as RB Tyrell Sutton. For Hamilton, Jeremiah Masoli just needs to stop throwing picks – and throwing such aggressively back-breaking ones at that. The Ti-Cats OL also needs to step up their game and buy Masoli some more time in the pocket as well. While Hamilton’s defense remains pretty solid, expect an experienced QB like Kevin Glenn to inflict some damage all the same, even with a reduced receiving corps.

PICK: Montreal

BC (2-1) vs. Saskatchewan (0-2), Saturday, July 16th, 7:00 PM EST: The Roughriders are the league’s only winless team so far in the season, but it’s not like they’ve been far off – a few close calls against both Toronto and Edmonton could have meant much different outcomes in the end. BC got their first L of the year against the Argonauts, with a ground & pound offense and ferocious D causing major problems for Jon Jennings & co. The Riders will be hungry for a win, and of the offenses Chris Jones and his players have seen so far, BC is the weakest by a considerable margin. Darian Durant looked really sharp against the Argos despite the loss, and another game like that will probably set up Riderville to go home happy when the night is over.

PICK: Saskatchewan

BYE: Calgary (1-1-1)

STANDINGS AND STATS

East Division Standings

West Division Standings

Passing Yards

1. Harris, OTT – 1083
2. Willy, WPG – 940
3. Masoli, HAM – 933

Passing TDs

1. Harris, OTT – 9
2. Masoli, HAM – 5
3. Reilly, EDM – 5

Rushing Yards

1. Messam, CGY – 185
2. Harris, WPG – 156
3. Whitaker, TOR – 139

Receiving Yards

1. Williams, OTT – 493
2. Bowman, EDM – 247
3. Fantuz, HAM – 245

Game picks this week: 1-3

Game picks this season: 3-9