Your “PAWWWWL, I THINK BAMA COULD BEAT THESE GUYS” Monday Night Open Thread

The Maestro
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The Maestro

The Maestro is a mystical Canadian internet user and New England Patriots fan; when the weather is cooperative and the TV signal at his igloo is strong enough, he enjoys watching the NFL, the Ottawa Senators & REDBLACKS, and yelling into the abyss on Twitter. He is somehow allowed to teach music to high school students when he isn’t in a blind rage about sports, and is also a known connoisseur of cheap beers across the Great White North.
The Maestro
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We got ourselves a presidential debate tonight! In teeny tiny little Hofstra University, a liberal arts college on Long Island, we have some of the greatest minds of our generation Donald Trump and Hillary Rodham Clinton duking it out tonight for millions of Americans to watch and converse lively about, but mostly to laugh at both and to drink until they fall asleep. In all seriousness though, folks, if you haven’t made up your mind yet on who you’re going to be voting for, you’re probably a fucking moron. Just whatever you do, please don’t vote for the sociopathic cheeto casing with a hairtrigger temper and his finger ready and waiting for the LAUNCH NUKES button from the discount bin at Staples. However, if I have to tell you this at this point in the campaign, it’s probably too far gone for you.

For those of us who want to see brain cells destroyed in a more civilized manner, we got ourselves a good ol’ southern rivalry tonight!

Atlanta (1-1) vs. New Orleans (0-2), 8:30 PM EST: GOOD’ OL ESS-EE-CEE MATCHUP WITH THE GEORGIA DAWGS HEADIN’ ON DOWN TO DEATH VALLEY TO TAKE ON THE… wait, shit, sorry, this is the NFL, which is to say that the guys playing tonight are only making a slight bit more money than their student-athlete counterparts here. We got a dogshit defence for the Saints, which got owned by the Raiders going for two in Week 1, and Drew Brees is also missing Willie Snead, out with a toe injury, which means he’ll have to lean on Brandin Cooks a lot more. For the Falcons, things aren’t that much brighter, with the D conceding around about 450 yards a game through two, though Julio Jones is healthy and ready to go despite some ongoing ankle issues, so that’ll help in a big manner against a terrible pass defence, if Matt Ryan can stop throwing fucking picks.

Expect all the points. Expect all the lies (from a certain candidate at the debate). Expect all the drinking. Expect the usual crushing disappointment in almost all aspects of our society, as per usual. LET’S GET TO IT.

The Maestro
The Maestro
The Maestro is a mystical Canadian internet user and New England Patriots fan; when the weather is cooperative and the TV signal at his igloo is strong enough, he enjoys watching the NFL, the Ottawa Senators & REDBLACKS, and yelling into the abyss on Twitter. He is somehow allowed to teach music to high school students when he isn't in a blind rage about sports, and is also a known connoisseur of cheap beers across the Great White North.
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadlier

Good morning!

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No

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America is too stupid to continue existing. Bring forth the revolution, the Chinese, the fucking meteor. I don’t care. I just don’t want anyone from this stupid country allowed to fuck up everything we touch even one second longer.

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Whoa. Shit just got real.

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

The best self flagellation sessions involve some crying. Get it all out at once.

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https://gfycat.com/ThreadbareEveryAiredale – gratuitous nudity NSFW

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Also from True Detective season 1. https://gfycat.com/HotDemandingFrilledlizard

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BallsOfSteel

Aww, hell yeah!

It’s too fucking hot to sleep…

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Worth the Herp

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Somehow I have a clip of Kate Beckinsale kissing Borat’s wife. https://gfycat.com/VerifiableFamousFruitfly

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

O… M… G…
/faints
/heartattack
/rigormortisjoke

BallsOfSteel

Guaranteed the sexiest anyone will every look in a Browns jersey:

http://images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/29100000/Christa-Miller-christa-miller-29106960-500-375.jpg

BallsOfSteel

And with that, I bid you bonne nuit!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
BallsOfSteel
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
BallsOfSteel

Definitely her best role!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

nsfw

h
ttp://67.media.tumblr.com/30a966e969f8d9677c777a0565bc3079/tumblr_nri85yjRqb1qf9csoo1_500.gif

BallsOfSteel

Oh yeah!

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

NSFW

h
ttp://67.media.tumblr.com/fdcf8defb368df5718d30d8f82c78ffe/tumblr_npeixjMtV01tezjkso7_250.gif

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It’s just that Paul Walker died after watching the video. https://gfycat.com/MiserableEnragedGoa

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Yeah, she was definitely worth pausing 2 and a half men on mute for. https://gfycat.com/PreciousDearestCommabutterfly

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

sorry for cheating as this is not from a movie or TV roll but just about anything she is in captivates me

BallsOfSteel
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
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I don’t know about sexiest role, but what a shot. https://gfycat.com/BigDearFreshwatereel

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BallsOfSteel

I would definitely say sexiest role!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

h

ttp://www.hollywoodnudescenes.com/pics/emily-blunt.jpg

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

OK, it keeps rejecting my posts. I’ll try for one more.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
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The only worthwhile part of an otherwise unwatchable movie. https://gfycat.com/SimplisticAccomplishedAvians

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Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo
BallsOfSteel

Excellent choice!

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