Answer: On fresh meat. It survived losing Tebow, and he was God’s Chosen Representative on this earth.
NFL News:
- It might be time to talk about JJ Watt not being around for much longer. He’s been placed on IR, which means at least out for 8-games.
- Nice to see Bill O’Brien facing his probable firing like a man.
- Watt put this out for the world to see, because he wants the world to know his pain. THIS IS WHAT TWITTER IS FOR, ZACH METTENBERGER!
Adversity sucks.
Your attitude towards it doesn't have to.
I will be back. pic.twitter.com/56lhtHYs7r— JJ Watt (@JJWatt) September 28, 2016
- Dez Bryant haz a hairline fracture in his knee. It’s described as “day to day”, although for the money he usually pays, JERRAL expects knees to hold up until he’s finished.
- Proving jet fuel can’t melt knee braces, Pete Carroll says Russell Wilson should be good to go for Sunday against the Jets.
- Putting the “NO FUN” in the NFL, the rumours are true that Antonio Brown was told to change his custom cleats by the refs before the start of the second half in Philly last Sunday. The shoes had his kids’ pictures on them, but he changed them so he’d be able to continue playing. He caught 12 for 140 yards, so he wasn’t a problem for anyone except the fashion police.
According to league rules, wearing “foreign substances on body/uniform” earns a $9,115 fine for a first offense and $18,231 for a second offense. Or the league could categorize the fines under “personal messages,” which results in a $6,076 fine for first-time offenses and $12,154 for a second.
- Jesus Tapdancing Christ!
https://twitter.com/Katie_Johnson_/status/781165247918960640
Finally, proving it’s never too early to have the important discussions, SB*Nation seems to be the first site willing to speculate on whether the Browns might go 0-16. They seemed afraid to double down on the use of sixteen quarterbacks as well. GO BIG OR GO HOME!
It’s a couple of days old, but Patton Oswalt talking about the passing of his wife is comedy gold only he could spin.
Man, I’d still be wrecked 4 months after my wife passed.
In addition, being married into an eastern European family proved to me there are some people who let no one feel joy, like the Polish lady he mentions. I know not everyone likes his stuff, but the bit about trying to shield his daughter is (to me) timeless.
Tonight’s sports:
- MLB Baseball:
- Indians at Tigers – 7:00 PM | ESPN/TSN
- Orioles at Blue Jays – 7:00 PM | Sportsnet
- Rockies at Giants – 10:00 PM | ESPN/TSN
- MLS Soccer: Toronto FC vs. Orlando City SC – 7:30 PM | FS1/TSN3
- WNBA Playoff: Game 1:
- Phoenix at Minnesota – 8:00 PM | ESPN2
- Chicago at Los Angeles – 10:00 PM | ESPN2
- NHL preseason: Oilers at Canucks – 10:00 | Sportsnet West/Pacific
Bad gambler & frequent victim of Kane, Pete Rose has appealed to the National Baseball Hall of Fame for eligibility reconsideration. NOT BEFORE SHOELESS JOE!
http://67.media.tumblr.com/1f389446c5140a119fea59f472083cac/tumblr_ocmwp9qTQG1ref0zlo5_500.gif
That would make me feel SOOOOOOO much better right now too.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/b00ca9961587743e7d096621fd2b745d/tumblr_ocmwp9qTQG1ref0zlo4_500.gif
http://68.media.tumblr.com/93620a364c683d2f13c8513d6b4b1b1f/tumblr_ocmwp9qTQG1ref0zlo2_500.gif
That Patton Oswalt segment was Richard Pryor level shit.
I must go now. My planet needs me.
Late Night Dance Party
I wasn’t trying to be depressive about when I was younger. I mean, some of that shit still lingers (mostly that I will always obsess over money). I have plenty of things to be sad about now, like how I realized how much of life and how many things people take for granted I’ve just forced myself not to want to either focus on some goals like the bar or just inertia from growing up telling myself that the next thing will be important so don’t bother with the present until I was in my twenties and realized how stupid that was.
Now I sound like an asshole again. Anyway, I’m trying to be better at this. It’s just work I’ve never done before.
I really need to go back to bed, instead I think I will watch Avengers: Civil War (I know I got the name wrong, he is the worst Avenger just like Leonardo is the worst Ninja Turtle)
Yeah, but CW is still better than Age of Ultron. That movie blew.
I am excited and nervous for this afternoon. I honest to God don’t even know what to do next. I know what I should do, but honestly it feels at this point like I’d have a better chance swimming across the Pacific than getting a lawyer job, and it’s just poison.
I will need you as a lawyer eventually. and you keep the same garbage hours as me so that will be helpful and I can’t be trusted. Get the job, inject the poison
/ Good luck sir
I need to get licensed in a real state.
You know what I never had before windows 10. A loading bar on my explorer window (checking on files window). This is the worst fucking OS ever. I might reinstalll windows xp
The American Western has ruined peoples logic part of their brain, letting thousands of people die then showing mercy to gold digger Hitler is a theme in a ton of movies across genres. Just kill him in the first scene and if you die you die, but you don’t get a ton of more people dead because of it later
I mean it politically too, a man murders thousands of his country men. Just fucking shoot him.
Movies are fucking dumb
I forget what my post was originally gonna be. Watching the Magnificent Seven again so assume I was thinking of something witty.
Can I do one thing without having to log in again? My fucking website to turn stuff in requires thee log ins. How about you go fuck yourselves.
What a Gal. https://gfycat.com/IncompatibleDeliriousIndianabat
http://vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/scream-queens/images/f/f0/Emmakiss.gif
I’M ONLY GONNA SAY THIS ONCE. JUST ONCE. DON’T MAKE ME SAY IT AGAIN.
ARE WE CLEAR ABOUT THIS? ARE WE CLEAR? OKAY THEN.
/i guess i said it twice, but that’s only because i meant it strongly
http://66.media.tumblr.com/e02337e46aad423cf403b8bdfba8bedc/tumblr_nhggx9tHPc1rznt2to9_250.gif
http://66.media.tumblr.com/f5285e8a77334881b4433ecb2ac1c7d0/tumblr_odarueZp8H1qdxhroo1_500.gif
One of my FB friends make this horrific mask his avatar and now I want to skin him alive.
You know what can suck a bag of dicks? Working.
Agreed totally. It’s funny, I’m on a bit of a professional sabbatical currently. People always ask me don’t I get bored? Fuck no, I don’t get bored hardly ever.
And when I rarely do, I have plenty of vodka and beers to help fight thru that shit. Like now for instance, it’s time to go watch some important television and such.
Nite folks.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/9cb7acf933f9041771269cf73d929bf0/tumblr_oe7shlBGW11qjqmkdo1_1280.jpg
Because of the drugs?
I thought he failed Gigolo school.
Well, maybe you shouldn’t have went to school for, and become a gigolo.
There’s a school for that?
/googles gigolo school
//dammit
If that had been my major, I’d be bitching a lot less. Because my mouth would be full.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/6f76897de909d83a4f705885781cf52b/tumblr_n7uf84fT811r652d1o1_400.gif
https://youtu.be/lmuKsI5kcKw
http://66.media.tumblr.com/4861fceeb440b165dfbf02cdbce38957/tumblr_n7s7gvNz7K1rznt2to2_250.gif
Mackenzie Vogt @mackenzievogt
@drewmagary the NFL is better off without irony-free John Cena in it
When I was a child I had 24 teeth pulled because my adult teeth weren’t strong enough to push out my baby teeth. Some of those teeth had to be drilled in half, and the halves pulled separately because the dentist wasn’t strong enough to pull the tooth whole. I remember the smell. I was novocained up, but totally conscious. My adult teeth, meanwhile, had turned back up into my head, and I had to have oral surgery where they cut into my gums and put brackets on my adult teeth so I could have braces for 5 years, again just novocaine. I couldn’t eat solid food for about a week after any of these, but because I was a kid I got FUCK ALL as far as after meds or post pain management.
I do now have lovely teeth, according to every dentist I’ve been to since then, but goddamn.
On the plus side, I only have one wisdom tooth, which is floating around painlessly somewhere in my head. I assume one of two things will happen. Either I will have a sudden seizure and die when said wisdom tooth migrates upwards in my head and spears an important bit of brain, or I’ll assume I have an ingrown toenail and it’ll fall out of my foot one day, really freaking my out as to how it got there, but leaving me essentially unharmed.
http://gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/Bubbles-trailer-park-boys-eyes.gif
Holy shit, Dok. No wonder you ended up at Miskatonic.
The only question is how is she not MORE of a mad scientist?
Well, she said she has nice teeth now.
Shit Dok. Looks like you win tonight’s “Dentistry Sucked for me” competition. Hell, I’m even considering giving you one of my pain pills for your retroactive suffering. Sheesh.
Open Letter to Lindsay Vonn,
STOP MAKING EXCUSES AND START MAKING THINGS HAPPEN!
JJ Watt
Open Letter to Lindsay Vonn,
It will seem less weird a few days after we’re finished.
-Moose
Hello!
http://25.media.tumblr.com/4c8ae954cf54aff55644f23d7da3551f/tumblr_mfxa8z4vvE1rqlmkso1_400.gif
I could do this all day bro
http://www.frenchtoastsunday.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/936full-diane-kruger-1.jpg
/Also what I’d say to Diane Kruger if I met her
//would be talking about getting maced