/Fox pre-game intro
Joe: “The good folks at DFW Ice Creamery were kind enough to provide us with samples of their very delicious products. I chose vanilla. [licks cone lovingly] Mmm, that’s so good! Troy, what flavour did you choose?
Troy: “You know me, Joe. I’ll always choose chocolate when I’m in Dallas. It always tastes so good! [his tongue dances on the tip of the ice cream cone]
Joe: “Gosh darn it-I can not get enough of this delicious ice cream!” [makes slurping noises]
Troy: “Can’t help but notice I got a larger cone than you did.” [slurps happily away]
Joe: “You know what they say-it’s not how much you can swallow, it’s more important that you’re satisfied at the end. [makes small moaning sound]
Troy: “You got that right mister. I’ve no doubt that we’ll both end up with a bellyful.” [eyes roll back into head]
Producer: [begins to realize what is happening] “CUT TO COMMERCIAL! CUT TO COMMERCIAL!”
GB/Dal– Them Cowpokes get a boner, bonus with the return of cb Claiborne after an absence of nine weeks. He’s back just in time to blanket wr Cobb because ace Jordy Nelson isn’t the gritty guy that everyone thought he was. Unlike Joe and Troy he was not able to suck it up. Another Pack wr is going to have to step up and my not-money is on Geronimooooo! (Allison) to jump into the fray and make a difference. I also think that Green Bay needs a half-decent day from te Cook. If he can grab 6-8 for 70-80 yards that will take some of the pressure off the outside guys and create a wee bit of hesitation on the part of the Dallas D.
The Cowboys just need to keep doing what they’re doing and they’ll be okay. There’s no reason to think that Eezy-Zeke will be thwarted in his efforts and that will limit the number of possessions that the white/lava/scorching/witheringly [runs out of breath] hot Rodgers will have to put points on the board. In addition, qb Prescott doesn’t seem to be the ‘rattleable’ type and the Pack’s D-Line isn’t a scary bunch with a lot of “Oomph!”. (says the old white guy from his couch) All in all, more things have to go right for Green Bay than Dallas-I think it should be close for most of the game but them Cowboys might pull away in the fourth. This is not my desired result, by the way.
Done. LET’S GO GET IT, POTLICKERS!!!
Does not bode well.
Dammit.
Damn. Fucked up my first comment.
This does bode well.
Been reading and laughing at this site since back when it was a totally different site. Never thought my first comment would bring me so much joy. Team meeting and locker cleanout in JJ’s Palace of Pain at 11am tomorrow. Heh heh
update: I still hate everythingDa fuck? I got booted by my computer machine and had to use my telephone device. Well, at least it was a game.
https://youtu.be/0iqLhdInGrk?t=2
Whoops, did not see that this had already been posted.
Now we get to see Alex Smith unleash the dragon.
http://www.beardeddragonguide.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/05/bearded-dragon-5.jpg
Indeed.
Now am hate drinking
http://img.memecdn.com/a-message-from-the-heavens_c_4462399.jpg
Fuck! Now I have to cheer for the Falcons and maybe the Chiefs. Fuck Andy Reid!
#TonyWouldHaveWon
Dak Prescott – GLOREEEE BOOOOOOOOY
Piece of shit sodomite pig fucker. Fuck you Rodgers. Eat a diseased asshole.
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Oh God my neck hurts from all the whiplash
You could say that Aaron went to Jareds…. hands!
You guys, you have no idea how good it feels to know Pats-Cowboys can’t happen now. It gives me hope.
PACKERS PATRIOTS IS FAR WORSE
*exhales for the first time in 45 minutes*
I know, right? This can’t be good for my heart
http://gifsec.com/wp-content/uploads/GIF/2014/08/the-finger-fuck-you-gif.gif
Someone keep Horatio away from spittable drinks and also krokodil
Cock sucking Rodgers.
So…a regular Sunday?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…
GIVE US SMUG ROMO FACE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0iqLhdInGrk
Sha’nkor almost says no.
SHE PUSHED IT BACK IN!!!
That was a fucking tease of a SHANK’LOR.
Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn.
What a fucking 4th quarter.
Hot fucking damn!
Bloody brilliant.
Fuck that.
HOLY HELL
*injects that shit directly into his veins*
Thats the kind of icing form I expect from a Yale man
Oh shit I love it when icing the kicker backfires so please please please please make this.
YEESSSSSSSSSSSSS
OH FUCK YOU
ICED ICED BABY
Is this where SHANK’LOR makes her appearance?
I think she gave it just a little kiss, to pucker some assholes as it flew.
Freeze the kicker?
Ahh fuck.
Shoot the fucker
MIss you fuck.
Wow. Makes up for that drop
Wow.
Thank god there are no infants in this house, because i can’t guarantee I wouldn’t kick one.
WHY DOES THE NFL TEASE US WITH ONLY ONE FUCKING GOOD GAME?!
Don’t worry, Chiefs-Steelers will likely be so full of enjoyable stupidity it’ll more than make up for being a shitty football game.
I like your attitude.
Winner winner, SMARF’n Dinner!!
That’s a god damn ridiculous catch
Wow
TOO MANY COOKS
BEAT DALLAS
get the fuck out of here