Take a bow, 2017. Please! That way it’s easier for us to kick you in the ass. First the kicking and then a good stompin’. Expect some spitting too, you goddamn bastard. In short: this thread is open to all gripes and rants about the bountiful cornucopia of awful shit that was 2017.
Know who had a great year? Catastrophic weather; the use of public office for private gain; the P*ts; and, empty words. To all of them, I extend my most heartfelt ??.
Remember when 2016 was winding down and we thought that was the worst year in memory? No reminiscing is necessary; we have your selfie (via @Tribe_XX)
In retrospect, what an innocent time 2016 turned out to be. Just imagine: Colin Kaepernick was actual trade bait and a Twitter beef could NOT spark nuclear war. This is another reality altogether. We also lost some righteous folks on the way via @77MASH):
But we gotta look forward. For starters, 52 SBE (Super Bowl Era) is still ongoing. All playoff bye teams finished at 13-3. PIT and NE will most likely play each other. The NFC playoff field looks much more interesting, and Mike Zimmer gets a good chance to shred it. Minnesota is playing for a home Super Bowl game. I dunno if this causes enthusiasm or trepidation for Vikes fans. I do know that Case Keenum and Teddy Bridgewater have NFL careers ahead of them, and that a Saints @ Vikes might wreck the Right’s Compound.
Oh Philly: you were having THE dream season, until the Wentz injury. But Iggles fans love misery so much, I guess they owe the Universe a “Thank You”. OK that was a bit, uh… Tell you what, Philly fans; let’s get behind stuff we can all celebrate: the Cowboys suck
Aside from Wentz, there were other major casualties this year: David Johnson, OBJ, JJ Watt, Dez Bryant’s fantasy career, Aaron Rodgers, the C-Hox secondary, “Baby Buster Sucks!”, Jerry Richardson… Huh. Turns out, perspective makes it a mixed bag. Except for QB evaluations that are not merit-based. Fucking cowards.
Another thing to look forward to: fired coaches! The Colts already did Chuck Pagano in. Helluva a start for 2018: having nothing to do with Jim Irsay, except getting his checks. Very Happy New Year, Chuck; they couldn’t eat ya.
As to the rest, Oddshark set at 6 the line of coaches fired by tomorrow, Black Monday:
I can hear Oddshark’s public relations people: “It’s not shamelessness. It’s transparency—integrity light!”
Titans fans were rooting for a loss, so Mularkey could get fired. WHY YA WANNA KILL THE JOY ABOUT EVERYTHING!!! All I know is I’m riding this delusional high up until next week.
Keeping it in the hopeful department, I found remarkable 2017’s taking down of sexual harassers and the push back on racist bullshit and aggression. Hey, sometimes one’s gotta go down there. I’m sure no hateful or oppressing mob has ever thought “We better not mess with these stoic and courteous folks.” To summarize my wishes for 2018,
On the local front, it’s Day 102 of unrestored power here at home in Puerto Rico. Ggkh! Sorry. It seems like I pulled my S2.
Tension Muscles: Aggravation (A), Shrug (S), Whatever (W).
Meh. What are ya gonna do. We’re fortunate in other ways. One’s gotta leave shit behind and look ahead—which takes us to a special Request Line.
So OK: 2017 blew, so let’s look forward to 2018. In the absence of equity and justice, let’s go with a killer playlist. The theme is easy: songs that are GOOD. You know,
- tracks that YOU would never, ever, EVER skip; and,
- that you would not feel ashamed recommending to others.
That’s it. Preference is subjective, of course; but since we’re getting the playlist later—kudos to RTD—can’t go wrong sticking to “1”. A personal favor, if ya could: no “Hotel California”. Doing otherwise may result in a subscription to High Times to your name—with the mags addressed to your mom, employer, church, licensing board and/or main client. Hey #JustSayin A People Magazine may be thrown in too, smartass.
That’s it for me; the real action’s in the comments, anyway. Lotta fun on this side of the Webz, after all, in this 2017. A very Happy New Year to all of you brilliant degenerates, and let’s start this with a thumper: a song about persistence and resilience, El Aguante by Calle 13.
Girl and heifer pics via @Flantasma1
Happy New Years mountain states!
i should get a boat
Jenny McCarthy is more botox than human. Plus, she has polio.
And a child-death toll.
She’s so fucking awful that it’s made me retroactively hate myself for thinking she was so hot in the Singled Out days.
But she was. Don’t hate yourself, bate yourself.
She caused enough DNA to be spilled on our basement couch to start a new civilization that would already be overpopulated.
I miss Dick Clark’s stroke countdown (my grandma had a stroke so I can make that joke; her stroke was famous throughout the Midwest and helped put me through college)
College?!? She told me that money was for booze and blow!
Either way, thanks.
The absence of a pencil bothers me far less than the erroneous apostrophe
I can’t tell if that is form-fitting or just an incredibly well-placed fold. I mean, the latter seems more likely because these photoshoots are highly choreographed, but the former is more titillating.
OK, copy /pastes seem to be slightly affected by beers.
The Browns bandwagon.
Nice Friends.
Kinda of a theme in 2017.
And I’m already tired of 2018
HEY SOME OF US AREN’T THERE YET NO SPOLIERS
Little Michigan fuckers thinking they’re all Led Zeppelin and shit.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zXdM1rqSlSQ
They’re pretty fucking awesome
we need more Ben Gribbard in our lives in 2018
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LGivmFgR3_w
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JUqcy_ptaEI
Question for Don T – Is it New Years Day there yet, or did all of that get cancelled and you’re stuck in 2017 for the next 6 months?
The clocks will update when power is restored in June.
2019 of course.
Well, look who is all optimistic.
Happy New Year, DFO! May this year be better than the last.
Happy New Years Central. that means you Texas. I don’t care what people say about you. Just kick Cruz out for Beto PLEASE.
Legal weed is the best, Love the West Coast.
I know that quite a few of you work as pretzel twisters at various snack factories across the U.S. and Canada, and I’m sorry to say that this machine that I designed and built will be taking over all of your pretzel twisting jobs. I’m truly sorry for your predicament that you’ll be finding out about tomorrow morning but you have to admire the genius of my machine. I came up with the idea while sitting on a public toilet.
*buys Cinnabon stock*
HEY DFO HOMELAND, WELCOME TO 2018
about time you morons caught up….
Happy New Years flyover states!
“What-over states?” – Hillary Clinton
Happy 1974 the Midwest!
Whoa, whoa! ’74 is way too progressive.
Eh, they get Foghat (maybe, not gonna look it up, Slow Ride MFers)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Cxry9cLFQI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgCIYkHBTIw&sns=fb
Happy New Year all you mad bastards. You will never truly know how much I enjoy reading your screeds and hiccups, even on the odd occasion that I am coordinated enough to comment. It is enough to know that you are out there… gives me hope. All the best in 2018!
comment more,
Don Lemon and Brooke Baldwin are gonna fuck on that counter.
I’d rather get be kicked in the crotch than suffer BRO-COUNTRY, but, Keith Urban’s tribute was pretty damn good.
Oh, so, Roy Moore is a Colbert fan?
No, I think Roy likes the target wearer audience.
Maybe it was, but it definitely wasn’t. I didn’t see it. But it wasn’t.
NO lil Peep tho
Good decision, since the wounds are too fresh for all of us.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jaJST4R9eog
who does Keith Urban think he is???? Trying to cover Black Hole Sun????
Don Lemon is wasted.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gY8iy8S0S4w
Happy New Year, lizard people. Found a post-concert party and a sixer of Sweet Baby Jesus to bring!
Would you take a one way trip to Mars? Your safety is guaranteed and you can communicate with Earth but it’s just you and 20 odd people on Mars + whoever comes after you settle. Could be 10 people or 1,000 people you don’t know.
You can never come back to Earth.
Is there internet?
yep
Is this a trap?
You’d be 1 of 20 on Mars. How much shit would you discover and get to name?
Yeah, I’m in.
I did just finish reading Beacon 23 though.
Cable TV? Can I communicate with family and friends on Earth in real time or is it like email?
think email
Hmm. That’s a tough one. With real time, I wouldn’t be completely gone; just not physically there. With email, I may go mad from isolation from my family and friends.
A new world Redshirt. you could send your family a memoir of your first year. That would make them rich. As i said above you would be the 1st to view and name things on Mars. The Collinsworth Hills, the Ickey Woods Rim, all you.
You’re a good seller.
Does Trump have any power over Mars? If so, no. If not, still no.
So, no.
Can we sent Trump to Mars?
Don’t wanna do that to Mars. Maybe into the sun, just to be sure.
I feel like the question being overlooked is M-F ratio?
50/50 all breeding age 25-35. assuming you are.
I’m a couple years past that but I don’t do breeding. Got that shit taken care of a long time ago. Also don’t tend to be into younger women, so unless my g/f is coming along, gonna probably pass. Priorities and all.
Happy New Year’s to all you East Coast Frozen Balls people!
Here’s a band I like, and you will too:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89Oc1UE7SS4
That CNN anchor in Denver is lit!
Skewer spots in death match wrestling is the only thing I can never feel okay watching
Oh look it’s Kelly Cartman.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vv7v7lQ3Gas
Hue Jackson will return to Browns next season? Apparently he has pictures of the Browns owner and a goat.
It’s funny because they think they’re a real NFL team.
Well it’s not like he’s 1 & 31 or anyth… wait, what?
i hope the Texans fire O’Brien and get the KC OC Matt Nagy
I have no idea what the difference between ariana grande and iggy azela
One’s aussie with a yuuuuuge booty. The other looks underage.
Makers Mark time. tWBS has posted in a bit. Is he drunk, driving or has the main act come on?
He’s getting processed. His sexy mug shot will be posted here shortly.
My first memory of 2018 was watching a wrestler smack another wrestler with a dildo covered in barbed wire.
CZW?
Beyond. David Starr vs. Joey Janela in a fans bring the weapons match.
Don’t know why you’re celebrating. New year’s doesn’t count until central time.
Yeah? We’ll I’m from one hour into the future.
DFO time or GTFO
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11KAK3XmD9U