Your “Weather Report? Sloppy With a Chance of Turnovers, of Course!” Sunday Afternoon Football Thread

Can we beat a micro-meme to death inside of 12 hours? I betcha we can and I’ll certainly do my part. I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention what some people call The Battle of The Canada, The Politest Civil War Ever, The Bleeergh By The Iceberg, The Red and Black and Blue Game, The Only Closers Get Cocoa Bowl, The Bury My Heart at Red Deer Cup, The EH, Be Nice! Game, The Atrocity By The Rockies, yes it’s the one and only Grey Cup. As a respectful gesture, not a single Canadian NHL team is playing today aside from Calgary and Edmonton. Well, now that that’s out the way… TO THE GAMES!

Cards/Chargers:

Tip of the helmet goes to Patrick Peterson for feeding 221 families in need this past Thanksgiving. My mind boggles at the size of his kitchen and living room though. The logistics of getting the mashed potatoes together while the turkey was resting-that alone must have been a logistical nightmare. And it was just one guy! I hope he didn’t use a food mixer to whip the potatoes-they always end up so gloopy. One single mother did complain that the dressing was a bit dry. So ungrateful. Why didn’t she just take the shuttle from the table back to the kitchen, throw some gravy into the microwave and then take the shuttle back to her spot? It’s that lack of initiative that will pretty much guarantee that she’ll continue to struggle. Ummm… Chargers win to get to 8-3.

Steelers/Broncs:

Pitt is undefeated on the road but it all comes crashing down like a mudslide in an eastern European country you couldn’t identify on a map. Forget about their league-leading 37 sacks. Forget about their 6 game win streak. Forget about their one-two-three punch of Brown, Smith-Schuster and Connor. “Top 10 Defence?” I say, “Top 10 Schmeefence!” And I mean it. Besides, Denver whipped out a special play last week and I’ve no doubt they’ll do it again today. Oh yeah, Phillip Lindsay, HE GON WILDCAT!

Fins/Colts:

I thought about slyly picking up Mr. Andrew “Hasn’t thrown less than 3 TD’s since September 23rd” Luck and stashing him but I chose to just go on living my life. No, the one has nothing to do with the other, I’m just sharing. If you don’t count most of the season, and who does, really-the Colts are 4-0. But just wait a second-good old Randy Dandy, Fanny Hill is back behind center for the Fins. So head over to your armoire and dig out your favourite play-action overalls and put those puppies on.

[looks round] Puppies? Who said “puppies”?

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Viva La Tabula Raza

And beloved Pats slide effortlessly into first-round-bye land.
After watching their performance today, though, not sure if they’ll get any further than that.

Redshirt

Ah, a Steelers loss is like a ice cold glass of lemonade to wash out the taste of a Bengals asswumpin’.

Spur

The Donks truly are Steelers kryptonite

King Hippo

just keep winning, you glorious fuckers!!

Viva La Tabula Raza

I’ve been loving watching Steelers lose since the mid-1970s, and still enjoy it immensely.

Brocky

that interception never would have happened if todd haley was calling plays instead of tomlin

-yinzers who voted for Trump

Petronel

FATGUYCEPTION

King Hippo

the most beautiful

King Hippo

HAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

outclevered yourselves, precious one

Redshirt

When will people learn to cover that JuJu guy?

King Hippo

motherfuck

King Hippo

way to hang in, Ike!

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Kenyon Drake sounds like a conspiracy theory.

King Hippo

Just perfect. 6 minute drive, cash in the TD

/fighting urge to go ML PIT

rockingdog

kenyon drake got an ouch

litre_cola

Hippo’s commentary on this game has been quite the roller coaster ride.

King Hippo

/was a lot worse yesterday

BC Dick

As a Canadian you should be ashamed to be watching anything but the grey cup. All of not cLgary, aka Cleveland/Houston of the north, should be pushing bad juju at the stamps to make them the bills of the CFL. three in a row. Come on!

Gratliff

I hope Fitzy burns Shitty Jingle Stadium née Fake Degree Online Stadium to the ground as he’s walking out the door. His ring of honor should be the fire pit he burns the team photo in.

King Hippo

need to keep the D off the field for awhile

hippofant

I eagerly await all the pundits telling us that Leveon Bell wouldn’t have fumbled there.

King Hippo

another bailout flag

King Hippo

GREAT, our only WR is hurt now

Redshirt
King Hippo

just fucking of course, lucky shits get it back

King Hippo

PeyPey jingle time!

Bob-Mc-Nair-Can-Rot-In-Hell

King Hippo

any Yinzer play that isn’t a post or fly route is idiocy

Redshirt

They have to keep the defense honest. If not, the defense would be in Cover 2 Deep every play.

King Hippo

I just know that they’ve run 4 or 5 such plays, not a Horse within 10 yards anytime

rockingdog

come on luck throw it to Doyle!!!!!!
Please???

Gatoraids

Adam Old man River vinaterei

Redshirt

After the bombs drop, there will be cockroaches, Keith Richards, and Adam Vinatieri kicking footballs of a tee.

Redshirt

Well Ben took a piss in the Locker Room and then he took a dump on the field.

Game Time Decision

Great shot of Elway, with the bar in the way

Sharkbait

It hides his bit quite nicely though

King Hippo

HARF!!

Sharkbait

HARFCEPTION

blaxabbath

ARI should just adopt the wildcat offense.

blaxabbath

This will be a solid post game radio show on the Cardinals flagship.

Sharkbait

Fire everyone?

blaxabbath

Shoot everyone.

King Hippo

tough, but fair

King Hippo

I’mma need 40 out of Hopkins tomorry. Minimum.

King Hippo

Donks’ secondary standing around holding their bollocks, per usual

Redshirt

Commentators to Big Ben running to the Locker Room:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CCi4zMJbMQQ