Silly NFL-related News:

-The Bears are looking for kicker options other than the fella currently on their roster. Take one step forward, Redford Jones-you just might be hoofing footballs for the least amount of money Chicago is willing to pay for a guy that might win them a few close games.

Asked to comment, fellow free agent kicker Bluechevy Smith said, “I knew I shouldn’t have gone to that car show!” (apparently the Bears’ search parameters were very specific…)

-The Raiders are taking a hard look at the pass-rusher offerings in this draft. HC Gruden is being criticized because he’s given highly-regarded South Brooklyn University’s Hind Sight a 6 out of 20 score.

TO THE GAME!

AFC/NFC:

I’m curious as to whether Hippo dropped some cash on the “8 minutes before I change the channel” over/under. Man, that is a real tough one.

Pour one out for the defenders in this game. Imagine if you will, that NHL defensemen had to play with Rhythmic Gymnastics ribbons instead of hockey sticks-that’s the sorta spot that they’re in.

I googled ‘great moments in Pro Bowl games’ and Marc Bulger’s legendary performance in 2004 popped up. Obviously I needn’t go into the details because I’d just be yakking about crap that we as football fans are already aware of.

Also, did you know that each one of Brandon Marshall’s personalities (4) caught a TD in the 2011 game?* Little-known factoid-fellow Pro Bowler Roddy White caught an STD while celebrating after the game.**

*I’m invoking the rarely-used “It Was Sorta Okay To Joke About Mental Health Issues Back Then” rule.

**Almost no hobos were harmed during the crafting of this post.

Raw, unsalted almonds as a snack? There’s gotta be a better way to deal with your dad beating the hell out of you when you were young.