That’s a Black-Eyed Peas tune, isn’t it? Well, at least I didn’t reference I Gotta A Feeling like I just did. Damnit!

TO THE GAMES!

‘Hawks/Falcons:

Man, I’m glad I didn’t chase after The Big Three (or Four) tight ends in fantasy this year. I decided on a middling dude and am glad that Austin Hopper paid off after a slow-ish start. There were enough balls to go around and now with Sanu gone there will be 6 more targets to spread around.

Eagles/Bills:

Philly can be exposed by long throws on either sideline and Josh has a big arm. That arm is also wildly inaccurate. Once again the Buffalo D will lock down its opposition and say a prayer that goes something like this, “Oh mighty Football Goddess, please don’t let Allen attempt any dumbass high school throws”. Much like every other god, this one doesn’t exist and their qb will eventually do something stupid.

Chargers/Bears:

Does rb Ekeler have Spidey gloves or somesuch? He’s caught 49 of 52 balls sent his way and has broken 15 tackles along the way. He looks to be the guy that will relieve the immense pressure that the Bears D-line is able to bring. The Titans have moved past Mariota, the Bengals are looking beyond Dalton and Chicago should do the same with Truth Biscuit.

Giants/Lions:

Is it Ty Johnson’s time to shred the Giants porous D a la Chase Edmonds? You can run on them, you can pass on them-all to your heart’s content. By way of response they’ll bend over and ask for more. Like Josh above, Danny Tencent can be an entertaining watch-if you like the long ball, tight-window throws that are as likely to be intercepted as caught and devil-may-care rushes down the field.

Bucs/Titans:

Tannehill did it all last week. Well, yes, he was efficient but he did not throw a single ball over 20 yards all day. Expect Todd Bowles D to creep closer to the line of scrimmage and bring that pressure. So if that happens maybe rb Henry is in line for one of those 20 rushes for 67 yards stat lines. The mitigating factor is Taylor Lewan’s exceptional run blocking talent.

Broncos/Colts:

It’s The Battle of The Equuses! Watch Your Eyes! Against every expectation Indy is the lead pony in their division and Brissett (and Reich’s game planning) is to blame. Er, you know what I mean. It must be added that Quenton Nelson has aided the process by giving up just one penalty, just 8 pressures and nary a sack.

Bengals/Rams:

Stay away from Tyler Boyd, fantasy dudes. His catch rate the last two weeks has been 43% and 38.5%. If you must start a Cincy wideout (and I’ve no clue how you fell into that well of depravity) go with Tate or Erickson.

Cards/Saints:

Brees is back behind center so look for the Saints to throw the long-ish ball that Bridgewater refused to. DJ is out so shall we Chase Edmonds last week’s points? I’m going to give it a go despite New Orleans’ D tightening up significantly over the last 4 weeks. If Fitz drops a pass this week you’ll witness history because he hasn’t yet this season.

Jets/Jags:

Unfrozen Caveman QB saw the spirits of his forefathers on the playing field last week and they told him tales of other tribes stealing his MILFs, his food and his will to win. Rattled by this vision, UCQB’s ball did not fly true to its a target. So now a sacrifice must be made. Will it be a Cave Lion? Maybe a Gazelleasaurus? Perhaps just a small token can be offered, say, a toenail?

Enjoy what’s on offer.