Your “That’s Why The Sun is Shining Brighter-The Pats are on a Bye!” Sunday Afternoon NFL Football Open Thread

It really does have a pronounced effect when one doesn’t have to hear about the goat-ness of Tom and the greatness of Bill. Food tastes better. My kids seem smarter. My mistress is open to new ideas. Clothes fit better. The hobo population seems to be thriving. (Well, not for much longer) Expense reports aren’t questioned. Life is good!

TO THE GAMES!

Fins/Colts:

Are you thin at wr? You might want to give a streaming opportunity to Zach “He’s Whack!” Pascal because he’s in line for all kinds of touches, what with Hilton out. The downside is his tosser will be the adequate Bobby Hoyer. But it’s Miami-whether it’s blow or TD’s, everyone scores! I’ll let you decide. The Fins give up a half first down (4.8 yds.) every time you run on them so Mack all day, right? Not so fast-although he has plenty of redzone touches (21) he only has 3 (!) inside the five yard line. Just weird. If you need a six spot from him he’s gonna have to run it in from outside the 10.

Panthers/Packers:

Both qb Rodgers and rb Jones were big disappointments last week after busting out two weeks ago but both should get back on track at home. McCaffrey has been everyone’s bread and butter and it likely will keep on going here because the Packers run D are 5th in missed tackles and 3rd in yards gained after contact.

Rams/Steelers:

Here’s yet another wr you could stream but why the hell are you looking for one at 4pm? Sometimes I just don’t ‘get’ you. Where was I-hey, the guy’s name is Josh Reynolds and he’ll carve out a spot for himself now that Cooks has had a second concussion on the year. He’ll likely take some time coming back just like Shepherd. Rb Conner is ruled out and Edmunds is banged up so unleash your handcuff of Samuels and have no worries. You did handcuff him, didn’t you?

Preach to the choir down below.