INT. THE MAX DINER – DAY

ANDY REID is in the midst of calling a time out.

ANDY REID pauses, confused.  He looks around and realizes that his surroundings have changed, and instead of being on the set of what he once thought was “Barbecue Tonight”, he’s at a diner called The Max.  ANDY REID looks at the play sheet in his hand and realizes it has become a menu.  He begins studying it assiduously. 

— [door flies open] —

KYLE “STYLES” SHANAHAN: [derisively] Oh, hey, what’s happening, meatball.

ANDY REID: [looks up from the menu]

KYLE: I heard you asked Lesley to the winter formal this weekend.

ANDY REID: [grunts, nods]

KYLE: Well, just so you know…it doesn’t matter who gives her a ride there.  What really matters is who takes her home.  And she’ll be coming home in STYLE. [touches his chin pensively] Or maybe that’ll be the other way around.

ANDY REID: She has thoughts and feelings, you know, Styles.  She’s not just some kind of thing that you put on a shelf for your friends to admire.

— [door flies open] —

LESLEY LOMBARDI: [is literally a trophy]

— [door flies open] —

ANDY: Mr. Goodelding!

MR. GOODELDING: Huh? Oh, hi Andy.

ANDY: Listen, Mr. Goodelding, you’re here about the 20 lbs of mystery meat that went missing from the school cafeteria, I can explain…

MR. GOODELDING: Mystery meat…? Oh, I don’t give a shit about that. I’m off the clock. I’m just here for a chili dog. You want one? I’m buying.

ANDY: [puts his arm around MR. GOODELDING] Mr. Goodelding, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship….

— [door flies open] —

PATRICK “CROAK” MAHOMES: [in a distinctive, froglike voice] Andy, Andy, you gotta come quick!

ANDY: Oh, geez, did Lisa finally press charges? Well, we knew this day would come eventually. The first thing we’ve gotta do is get you a lawyer…

PATRICK: No, it’s not about that. It’s Tyreek. He’s acting real weird. First he cut off all his dreadlocks and thein he punched a caseworker from Child Protective Services! Now he refuses to come out of his room and has been running in place for the last half hour. You gotta do something!

—

INT. TYREEK’S BEDROOM – DAY

ANDY REID stands angrily in front of TYREEK HILL, examining a bottle of pills.

ANDY: [reading the label] Dextroamphetamine? But these are…[eyes widen with rage]…DIET PILLS!

TYREEK HILL: No, coach, it ain’t like that…

ANDY: Tyreek, where did you get these?

TYREEK: They just help me run faster, coach. That’s all.

ANDY: You can’t be messing around with this stuff! I’m flushing these down the toilet.

TYREEK: No, coach, I need them!

The two tussle over the bottle of pills. Eventually ANDY is able to wrest them away from TYREEK, who then turns and tries to run up the wall like Sonic the Hedgehog. He makes it about two steps up and then crashes down to land on his backside. He then hops up and starts running in place. 

TYREEK: It’s just to help me run fast coach! I’m gonna run all the way to Miami! I’m so excited…I’m so excited…

ANDY REID grabs TYREEK HILL in an emotional bear hug.

TYREEK: I’m so…scared!