Your “At Least It’s, You Know, Football” Thursday Night Open Thread

Well, they can’t all be winners can they? (I feel that I’ve typed this more than a couple of times over the years)

Newsy Notes:

-Will Hernandez got himself the Covid and was sent home as were two coaches. You know Will, he’s the once promising 2nd round pick of the Giants whose play has gone steadily downhill because everyone on the O-line is struggling like a bugger. Things are so bad that at some point later in the year we’ll be seeing three rookies and a soph on the line ‘protecting’ Jones. Good Lord.

-Dontario Poe is nevermore sayeth Jerry Jones. Despite getting a lion’s share of snaps as an interior d-lineman he had all of one qb pressure so far this year. Not one to call anyone a fatty fat fuck, JJ noted that Poe wasn’t in shape. This despite the fact that his contract had weekly “Don’t Be Fat” incentives that could have dropped a hefty $500,000 into his back pocket by year’s end. Would you give up pizza, wings and beer for 17 weeks so that you could go on a half million dollar hooker, scotch, cocaine and fried food binge afterwards?

TO THE GAME!

FALCONS/PANTHERS-

-McCaffrey is a no go show tonight but rb duties have been covered quite nicely by 6th year wonder Mike Davis who is headed for his best year ever.

-Carolina’s improving D was set back a bit last week in the loss to the Saints but still surrenders a mere 6.3 yards per passing attempt which is the best the league has to offer.

-Your sneaky play on the daily fantasy front is Curtis Samuel-the Falcons don’t defend anything well but their slot cb Isaiah Oliver gives up 9.3 yards per attempt and PFF ranks him 123 out of 126.

-Teddy Ballgame Manager has thrown for 300 only twice this year and of course he did so the last time these teams played. (he got Dan Quinn fired as well, such is his power)

-Here’s hoping Rasul Douglas isn’t ready to roll so that my mancrush Cal Ridley can go bananas on Troy Pride Jr. The Riddler leads the NFL in air yards and end zone targets.

-The Falcons have lost three games this year whilst having a 98% win probability late in the fourth quarter.

-One stat that indicates that Atlanta has an unusually conservative gameplan week in and week out is that they have 100 third down attempts which leads the the NFL. That’s a lot of talent being wasted.

The floor is yours.

 

 

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Gumbygirl

Is Teddy out of the bouncy castle yet?

Doktor Zymm

Well damn, I hope this isn’t another Takoma Narrows

Viva La Tabula Raza

My dad went to Bridgewater State in SE Mass, but he probably doesn’t know who Teddy Bridgewater is, and if I asked, I would probably get a racist response. Regular old people just get more racist as they age. Couple of my nephews went to the same school, and they are not racist.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Fuck Joe, the dude was 10 yards from where the deflection of the pass hit the ground, that is not “nearly picked off.” Please die.

Gumbygirl

I was hoping Justin Turner would find Joe after the game and plant a long sloppy smooch on his smug kisser. Asshole!

Gratliff

Even trickeration seemed subdued and uninteresting

litre_cola

TRICKERATION!!!!

Viva La Tabula Raza

Watching ATL PK kick FG, I am reminded of something that now makes me feel kind of ashamed.
I spent 3 years in the Far East in 1982-85 on a Navy ship based in Japan and subsequently in Guam.
Me and the white guys and the black guys and even the Filipino guys in my division used to sing this song but with the word “gooks” substituted for “girls.”
I’m very liberal now but still feel guilty when these memories come bubbling up after almost 4 decades.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RWYA9BvxMso

Gratliff

One of my favorite podcasts is What a Hell of a Way to Die, which is hosted by two ex-military-turned-leftists. Both spent time in the Middle East during the wars and there’s not a small amount of self-loathing over some of the shit they participated in. There’s a lot of military jargon than I can really keep up with, but there’s even more righteous fury which I’m always here for.

https://soundcloud.com/hellofawaytodie

litre_cola

Sooo Atl D line good? Or Carolina O line really bad?

litre_cola

CBD Helps my wife big time!

I also know that THC makes me less murdery!

TheRevanchist

For my wife’s back. I used it once or twice. It worked much better than I thought it would. Expensive though. 35 dollars at CVS. But worth what it does.

Gratliff

Vet had me give the boy dog trazodone before bringing him in this time and he is still high as fuck. I put a treat in his mouth and he couldn’t close his mouth fast enough to grab it. Pretty sure I just watched him fall down the last couple stairs by trying to walk like he was already on the ground.

litre_cola

Ok Jah Rhule, Throw the fucking ball to Moore and Anderson, maybe mix in the tight end helping with protection.

Sharkbait

44 more yards to Anderson please!

Last edited 3 years ago by Sharkbait
Gratliff

Whoo, rolling back the Michigan reopening after breaking the daily record yet again. 3700 cases today (2600/day average) with a 8.5% positive rate compared to 150/day and ~3% in June. I’ll be fucking shocked if any schools are in-person come Christmas. Thank god both campaigns still have like 10 fucking rallies planned this week.

Doktor Zymm

Hey, you’re doing better than Switzerland?

Gratliff

What’s the militia situation like out in Scandinavia?

Doktor Zymm

I hear they have giant knives

Viva La Tabula Raza

Cool wood ships with lots of oars and dragons for figureheads, too.

litre_cola

Wonder if this will work properly on Netscape or Opera..

Gratliff

Real men use Lynx
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ArmedandHammered

That screenshot is giving me flashbacks and not in a good way.

Gratliff

I was very impressed with how the first half took 6 hours

WCS

My bad, coach.

Viva La Tabula Raza

OMG a fucking Trump ad in Texas. I thought they had this state sewn up. (BTW, ad was full of shit).

Recovery Whiskey

The poll track sites have Texas as either “tossup” or within margin of error pale red. The fact they’re spending there proves its not a done deal.

Viva La Tabula Raza

All appendages crossed.

Viva La Tabula Raza

All appendages crossed. Though Repubs are doing everything they can to ratfuck the election here as well as other states.

King Hippo

Texas is in the realm of plausibility, just unlikely. Maybe 15-20% chance to flip D.

But don’t drop ded, the next decade should be fucking glorious, as all your asshole hat-wearing GOP operatives pretend they were never Trump cultists at all. As they try to cling to the fringes of power.

Gratliff

I sort of wonder what the distant future will look like (besides hot). Will the GOP crazy itself out and leave the Dems to split between progressives and traditionally conservative types, or will we just have crazy maniacally evil vs. “hey, we’re slightly less evil than those psychos” evil? Short of literal civil war or revolution, I don’t see us ever breaking the two party system since the whole thing is built to protect itself, so one of those seems the most plausible.

WCS

I have a coworker who is a Covid-truther, insists it’s either a lie, or nothing to worry about. I have explained to her multiple times about people we know who have caught, that Lil’ WCS’s school shut down for two weeks.

“That’s just the media trying to get Trump.”

I can’t handle this.

Doktor Zymm

Follow her around with a bell yelling ‘UNCLEAN’

WCS

BRING OUT YOUR DEAD

Game Time Decision

Forever un clean

Gumbygirl

Burn the witch!

King Hippo

Running the “Trust the Generals, Stupid” ad during TNF – between two Southern squadrons – is just excellent targeted media.

Team Biden knows what the fuck it’s doing. Helps me to sleep at night.

Viva La Tabula Raza

I hope that Atlanta can at least beat Senators Perdue and Loeffler.

Gratliff

good fucking lord can we can get to wednesday already

Viva La Tabula Raza

This is foreshadowing of the next three months.

Doktor Zymm

Probably won’t help as much as you think, no way we have returns from every state by then

King Hippo

My vote for weaselfuck Cal Cunningham means Hippo is now officially a “Yellow Dog” Demmycrat. And I am an insanely partisan cat person.

Viva La Tabula Raza

“yellowdogs and catlovers living together – mass hysteria.”

Brocky

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Game Time Decision

Great 30 second shot of the stadium lights there Fox. Still more interesting than most of your shows

Doktor Zymm

Sour cream with my pork habenero tamales was a good choice

Recovery Whiskey

Good evening folks. Is WordPress the new blog partner of NFL Thursday Night?

litre_cola

Evenin. I have way too many players involved in FF tonight. NAWT Samuel.

Game Time Decision

You nawt start him?

litre_cola

Just have everyone else but him, and he goes off.

yeah right

Fucking WordPress

Sharkbait

Was that a folgers ad making fun of the New Yorker guy?

Redshirt

Ah ha! The Falcons have a lead! The Panthers’ plan is proceeding as planned!

Gratliff

Panthers unis are an abomination

Petronel

Both teams look as if they forgot to put their pants on and are running around in their Under Armour.

rockingdog

LOL
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Doktor Zymm

I hope that one day, the Atlanta Falcons will employ a native of Malta

Gumbygirl

That’s the stuff dreams are made of(on)

King Hippo

I just now got this joke. I really miss the old days of not being (at least not ward-of-the-state calibre) stupid.

rockingdog

found a funny:

just voted by fax in a staples in canada AMA

King Hippo

Cheers/Night Court was the best network comedy 1-2 punch. By a long shot.

rockingdog

i liked that commercial

Doktor Zymm

Think I might go to Albania in February

Gumbygirl

Is that you Mrs. Pollifax?

Clipboard Jesus

That borders on the Adriatic

Brocky

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jjfozz

Yo man shit ain’t working right on the site

Viva La Tabula Raza

I feel twenty years younger.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsNaR6FRuO0

Redshirt

https://www.bing.com/th?id=AMMS_549c36b5884916524fe0cdecff4f5317&w=110&h=110&c=7&rs=1&qlt=80&pcl=f9f9f9&cdv=1&pid=16.1

Time to dig my Packard Bell out of storage and sign into a AOL…once my blasted kid gets off the telephone!

King Hippo

Just hope me AOL minutes ain’t run out ,, smh

Redshirt

Time to dig my Packard Bell out of storage and sign into a AOL…once my blasted kid gets off the telephone!

Redshirt

Yeah, earlier this week I thought the site crashed. I’m don’t wanna go back to reality. Most definitely not now!

King Hippo

Looks like we’ll be takin’ things slooooowwwww tonight, like trying to bang some evangelical chick or sommet.

King Hippo

Somebody bring me a speedball, I shall gladly let said hamster have the speed portion!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLWKdm-3pB8

Redshirt

…but on the bright side, once you get the combination the religious girl’s Chasity belt, you get to deal with a lot of repressed lust. Plus, you know the turf is clean.

King Hippo

In my (really fucking outdated) experience, getting a finger in…occasionally works. You just ain’t putting nothing in your mouth.

Viva La Tabula Raza

Or hers.

Recovery Whiskey

The poophole is the loophole

King Hippo

Yeeeewwwww a 5-star man, Scotchy!

God help me, but with the possible rain and wind…leaving in Burrow (Down FOAR Midterms?) over Teddy Ballgame.

Redshirt

I’m thinking of going on an interstellar archeology expedition. Anyone want in?

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/hubble-space-telescope-rare-asteroid-16-psyche-worth-10000-quadrillion/

TheRevanchist

This is the story of two teams, Panthers and Falcons. These the Panthers (insert image of a dying horse) and these are the Falcons (insert image of a dead horse). And this is Soap.

Sharkbait

My dinner prep, artists conception:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kz6Kcz62onA

Solo isolation is going great guys. I don’t know what you’re talking about

King Hippo

This is maybe the most underrated moviefilm in the history of EVAR