2020 Quotables – Week 17 (Results)

Good run with Quotables this season, all. Between losing our main joke-butts (fans at games) and dealing with the mental anguish that is the present day, I’d like to come down from my ivory tower for a moment and just pay my sincerest gratitude and express the great levels of respect that I have for each and every person, especially in a time like this, who has —

Oh. I hit my word limit. Please enjoy your Week 17 Quotables results below (submissions here).


“’Chase Young, stretching out his shirt’ What are two bad things done by Jared Fogle?” -SonOfSpam

“‘You see the way he got all riled up, and then settled back down again? Looks like all our efforts to teach him about his place in society finally got through.’ – Board of Education” – Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Odd time to introduce your new QVC line of jewelry.” -LemonJello

“If this was the Jets, there would have been one player going around in a circle with a very small diameter.” -JimU

“6 feet, my man.” – BrettFavresColonoscopy

“This is Green Bay’s actual commuter rail system.” – Doktor Zymm

“They say past sins come back to haunt you… Now Drew has to live with the fact his favorite team is helmed by a jar of mayonnaise.” – Duchess

“Still the last dawg pound where you’d ever want to adopt a pet.” – BrettFavresColonoscopy
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blaxabbath
I sat on a jury years ago, 2nd degree attempted murder case. One day the defendant wore sneakers with his suit to court. It was that day I knew he was guilty.
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Viva La Tabula Raza

I’ll probably post this again when the open thread goes up this evening.

So, when I read that the San Diego lady that died during the Treason Assault on our Capitol had been carrying a Gadsden Don’t Tread on Me flag (you know, the one that looks like a shit emoji on a yellow background) and had died from being trampled to death, all I could do was laugh ironically and think of the T-shirt that was briefly available in the Rolling Stone classifieds after the Cincinnati Who concert disaster. It read:

“I’D WALK OVER YOU TO SEE THE WHO!”

Paraphrased/updated for 40 years later:

“I’D WALK OVER YOU TO START A COUP!”

Cue up the LZ:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y60Ithcdok8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U2xFLLG2jqk

Last edited 3 years ago by Viva La Tabula Raza
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s really, really funny that she went out that way.

JimU

Twitter finally grew a pair and banned the orange turd.

LemonJello

Really hope Urban Meyer passes on the Jaguras coaching spot. Go shit the bed somewhere else.

Tangentially related: Harbs the Lesser reported to have signed extension to continue MEEEEshigan’s slide into the depths of the B1G Conference.

Last edited 3 years ago by LemonJello
Downfield Matriculator

I will admit to being happy about Capt. Khakis staying in Ann Arbor — a useful palliative for taking the sting out of Saban’s minions ruining my Monday next week.

ballsofsteelandfury

So does that mean no Playoff Quotables?

Great job, everyone, on the weekly SonOfSpam spotlight dance.

LemonJello

They can take our Quotables when they pry the keyboards from our cold, dead hands!

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SonOfSpam

So we CAN take Heston’s gun now. Cool.

Duchess

How about a playoff of quotable see what quote is the best quote of the season.

Game Time Decision

Quotables is and has always been my favoUrite post here. The funny that’s brought each week is just outstanding.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Quotables is one of the rare bright spots of the last 12 months. Thank you for the work you do in these dark days. Seriously.

I’m still angry about everything else though.

Dunstan

What’s the line, “if you’re not angry, then you’re not paying attention”?

Duchess

Or you have been paying attention and just uncomfortably numb

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“I thought it was ‘if you’re not hungry, you’re not paying attention.'” – Andy Reid

Dunstan

“Andy, let’s go get some fucking snacks!” — Rex Ryan
/slaps Reid on the ass, HARD

I feel like this is the team-up that we’ve all been waiting for.