Despite continued outbreaks, postponements, and cancellations (both Everton and my Shitty Wolves will be unexpectedly off this weekend) – the Premiership marches on.  Sort of.  But losing the fixtures I care about this weekend, and seeing the FITBAW post-season schedule get all used up…well, thunderfuck reality.  It’s back to MOAR Pretend Man City than is healthy, but I am quite excite for the 2080-81 season.  Most notably – despite going out on pennos in the Raging Semis last season – I am on a never-to-be-broken run of 127 FA Cup matches without defeat.  HOW? You might ask – because “going out” on penalties does not qualify as a Lesser Loss.  It’s still techincially a Draw, and as y’all know, technically is the best kind of correct.

I have also lost in the Shempions final two years running, and that really chaps my ass.  Time to sell some fuckers, and fuck some shite up.  I love pre-season!

Also just started “The Berkut” per Viva La Tabula Rosa’s recommend.  Not deep into it, but can already tell it will be really good.  Is nice to converse with fellow literates in our Imaginary little world.

Anyway, to today’s fixtures (5 in 4 time slots):

Nobody is setting their alarms for Wolves and Fat Sam’s Brummies (7:30, NBCSN).  But raw off a home loss to THE MIGHTY BLUES of Everton, perhaps Wolves will be out for blood, and run these sad motherfuckers into the ground.  FUCK SAM ALLARDYCE IN HIS MANY FUCKHOLES.

Finally, an old school(ish) 10:00 multi-match window!  Leeds and Trash Birds (NBCSN) will give you quite the clash of styles.  Let’s hope Madman Bielsa gets his wish, in terms of tempo.  Otherwise, one is stuck with Hammers/Team White Lives Matter (Peacock), and ain’t nobody interested in that.  OK, except Fronk (sorry, my Imaginary Dude, am just salty).

Spotlight Dance doesn’t interfere with NFL goodness this week, and a good thing – Litre’s Mighty Whitey get the trespassers of Chelski this week (12:30, NBC), having finally figured out a balance of defense and counter-attacking.  I really do think Fulham will stay up, and honestly not messing with Dry Litre (which we all best tiptoe around).  This will be a Clubhouse Derby, with Funny Finder rockingdog repping the blue side.

Finally, Foxes and Saints are streaming (3:00, Peacock).  Yeah, this sounds like a bunch of guys peeing on each other.  But it’s this, or NFL pre-game.  Like Sophie’s Choice, if you wanted to give both kids to the Nazis.

Hopefully, we have seen the last of treasonous sedition/insurrection.  Still, I want some public hangings.  Because how else can we heal amirite??