INT. DFO PRODUCTION OFFICE – DAY
A pair of sleazy Hollywood executives are at work in their shared office. One – DARKEST TIMELINE ZACK MORRIS – is seated at his desk in front of a pile of spec scripts. The other – RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY – is sprawled out on the couch playing with his phone.
DARKEST TIMELINE ZACK MORRIS: You know, when I gave you access to the corporate twitter account I thought you were going to use it to promote our content.
RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: [not looking up] I am promoting our content!
DTZM: Trolling Ellen DeGeneres does not help promote our content.
RTD: [continues to squint at his phone] I’m building the brand. I’m establishing us as a witty and engaging presence. Just like our productions!
DTZM: [gestures to pile of scripts] We need to make some decisions about new material or all the brand-building in the world isn’t going to do us any good.
RTD: [finally lowers phone and looks up] Fine. Are there any gritty reboots we could do?
DARKEST TIMELINE ZACK MORRIS stands up, reaches below the desk, lifts up a banker’s box filled with scripts, and drops it heavily onto the coffee table in front of RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY.
DTZM: There’s at least forty of them in there. Take your pick.
RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY starts leafing through them.
RTD: Hmm…Ski School…The 5th Element…Mr. Mom…Weekend at Bernie’s…Rumble in the Bronx…ooh, Brewster’s Millions! How about that?
DTZM: We already tried to get the rights to The Toy, don’t you remember? Pryor’s estate was not interested.
RTD: Oh, right. [picks phone back up]
DTZM: Damnit, we need to focus!
RTD: Okay, okay, let me just tell this conservative activist that Vigo the Carpatian just told her she’d be prettier if she smiled more.
DTZM: [pulls the phone out of his hands] Rikki, you need to stop.
RTD: [continues punching away at thin air for a second before realize the phone is no longer there] Hey!
DTZM: Speaking of stopping, that would make a decent theme for Request Line this week.
RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY tries to reach for his phone without having to get up from the couch, but is unsuccessful because DARKEST TIMELINE ZACK MORRIS has taken two steps towards the window.
DTZM: Yeah…stopping and starting. [holds Apple watch up to his mouth] SIRI, LET’S START THINGS OUT WITH A DOUBLE SHOT…
SIRI: Dialing Blue Bottle Coffee…
DTZM: SIRI, CANCEL. SIRI PLAY “START ME UP” BY THE ROLLING STONES FOLLOWED BY “STOP BREAKING DOWN”.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nEqp6k5t51k
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6ErZtdLEwY
How has this song not been posted yet? Best Stop lyric ever!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=otCpCn0l4Wo
Back when the Atlanta Hawks were still in the playoffs I kept saying “Please Huerter Don’t Ham ‘Em” which nobody found remotely as funny as I did.
I vow that I will buy a bunch of Hammer Time! stickers and stick them on various stop signs around the LA area someday.
Just purchased them.
tWBS: [via ouija board] Come on, man, give it a spin.
RTD: I’d really rather not.
tWBS: Listen, what can I tell you, this barista’s really into this kind of music.
RTD: I’d have thought she’d get sick of it. They probably played it all the time.
tWBS: She only worked there for a week before she got killed in a tragic espresso machine accident.
RTD: How would that even…
tWBS: Come on, man, help me seal the deal!
RTD: I would never do this for anyone else.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2UiX4dUUjWc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kp5GeJoglik
& the version by the “Spanishtonians” as well.
Quite apt for the recent lesser footy tourney…
& here’s a double shot from Merle:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7PY2yW9Biyo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHyILaHQolU
A little Ray will make your day!
https://youtu.be/zHevN7NPo0A
& a double shot is twice as nice.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8y0KsGEysvo
A Green Day by any other name, um, would be these guys
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Un2XxeNrnaM&ab_channel=maruugreenday
“These guys are gonna be the biggest band in the world in 10 years” would have been a hell of a prediction when this song came out.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jrg1UAixGaM&ab_channel=GreatPerformers1
Surprisingly solid cover:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKDo6g4CCeU
Oh, hai Uproxx
Did not see this one either.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGJQPkfwlAc
Gonna need a palate cleanser from tWBS’ latest request.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pURJDToKA0k
DOUBLE-ISH SHOT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oF_kotcq7sY
Not in the title, but….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qtn2CrPoZys
Drew Brees gives this one a thumbs up.
Miss you, brother.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_DgXvcfhYg
I scrolled all the way through and did not see this?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QV9JJmSCiI8
“Don’t. Stop. drinking until tomorrow…”
I’ll take “Things a Californian Has Never Said” for $800
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lIPan-rEQJA&ab_channel=masterofacdcsuckaS
& here’s a Triple from the tantalizingly titillating Tina Turner:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D5WFN-8GT3w
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v_xjGx1itgM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pvApXPKRzjA
“I Took Three Bennies and My Semi Truck Won’t Start” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hqzzqX3VCc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zamd0eYNWdc
& a triple shot from the Commander and his Airmen.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hAKBwRPX6s
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jYJUi3WGBpY
& a Dead triple shot
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Axn-RWi2Po0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYddDcjRSbk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tek7AI7EcTI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4NI1_2UCsc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8hCjrH-1JQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wveUjX6KFR8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hj9671V_UxA
DOUBLE SHOT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZBCDL_EXAc
This sounds like something Fitzpatrick Bateman would play while torturing a call girl.
Let’s make it a triple shot.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VjKFB2UAeMw
I like Chrissie’s version a teeny bit better
https://youtu.be/wB9zg_JIL0k
Ooh, the rare self-contained thematic DOUBLE SHOT.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DPpug5FUQsc
“I would like to request a classic hit from among the finest of your available songs…” – Silky Gerrard
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2FW1WJc0lg
oh, that’s GOOD
Wonder how Silky and the ladies are doing these days.
I mean, COVID can’t be great for bidness?
“GO AWAY!” – Derek Carr
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kzZhs89nu2A
OK, opening myself up to “hipster doofus” charges, but this is an excellent tune, PERFECT songwriting, and an all-around great band.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwdUVjyxWrM
Pedro the Lion has your back.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p2vIL0S5X24
Indie rock classic here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GbD1sZj8BbA
Wouldn’t have bet on him dying before her
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H5i7j0VhEHw
I mean, they both believed quite strongly in exercising their livers? Womenfolk have like a 5-7 year biological advantage, though.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=beT8yow_m0Q
RIP to the Rankingest. What a fun song and group.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1MlBzPvCsMo&ab_channel=ShoutFactoryMusic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cRvUXCVJTOs
There is a song in this! Stop the world, we broke up!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=le6oGav2iTo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cj8St8BscwE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ECw76_KCUg0
& one from the Boyz
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xt52jySHZUM
One from the Wolf..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_uQCEZ39Cw
Another double shot from the Stones.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgFcMFY4bkU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUjd8lt2EBY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cl-cPsdqaCs
Need a palate cleanser after that last one
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZCxyOcvp5A
Hey, great topic, I have a song in mind
No
C’mon, it’s a kickass song
No
Look, I’m not working today and
Wait, you have to work there?
I don’t have to, but it’s the best way to meet cashiers
Hang on…why are there cashiers? You gotta buy stuff up there?
Nah, but a lot of people really like the experience.
Okay man, anything else?
Tell Balls to get that thing on his taint checked if he doesn’t wanna join me.
Weird. Ok, look, for old time’s sake, I’ll take your song.
Awesome. You know you love this one.
Dude.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IKqV7DB8Iwg
DAMMIT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQx-Qy6_f-8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dwFoTGp_RkI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdlRJOhvZAw
Triple shot from Soul Brother #1
https://youtu.be/2fg8GuqhKMg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDHBA-IV0Ew
Enjoyed this song until I realized it was about boy accumulation.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yURRmWtbTbo
It’s actually my favorite Michael Jackson song.
Unfortunately, this song is also great.
DOUBLE DIDDLER SHOT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XMvPTFzgVU
Mine too. Except for some Jackson 5 stuff. Favorite solo song.
Speaking of the Jackson 5
https://youtu.be/C6pLV9xZczM
I always hear it as “don’t stop till you get it up” – with happy thoughts of a frustrated masturbator.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_zBs3t36wM
& the original, for you purists..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Vqu2zOwYYI
Good song by which to beat zombies with pool cues
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HgzGwKwLmgM
“…but everytime I do, just the thought of you makes me stop, before I begin”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1AHec7sfZ8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BKpAHZxkhJw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJnTd3pAQ3A
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iF5bA1Arsco
Actually, the lyrics make me wonder if Cole Porter was into the needle drugs….
“The one about how much you hate filthy immigrants? Yes, Morrissey, we’ve heard that one before.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QTqFdaVGRew
DOUBLE SHOT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9YjzGbrNAs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ITyXjY5L-_E
For the longest time, if I wanted to make my wife happy, I would walk into the room and sing HOW CAN I EXPLAIN at the top of my lungs. In fact, I’m gonna go do that right now while she’s on a conference call.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJQnZZ-Wmao