INT. DFO PRODUCTION OFFICE – DAY

A pair of sleazy Hollywood producers are relaxing in their office. One – DARKEST TIMELINE ZACK MORRIS – is seated at his desk, staring out the window with a dreamy expression on his face.  The second – RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY – is laying on his back on the couch, “smoking” a candy juul inhaler.  A notification chime sounds, and DARKEST TIMELINE ZACK MORRIS raises his wrist and taps an icon to accept the call.

— [Apple Watch flies open] —

OLD SCHOOL ZERO: What’s up, rock stars?

DARKEST TIMELINE ZACK MORRIS: Long time no see!

RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: Did Traycee get that paperwork over to you?

OSZ: [holds up a fountain pen]  You see this?  I’m signing it right now.

DTZM: You won’t regret this, I promise you.

RTD: The script is so good.

DTZM: So, so good.

RTD: We’re not promising you that it’s going to get a Best Original Screenplay nomination…

DTZM: …you know we can’t promise something like that…

RTD: …but what we can promise you is that it will be in the conversation.

OSZ: You had me at “conversation”…[scrawls his signature with a flourish] All done.  I’ll have Alysson fax over your copy.

DTZM: Great!

RTD: Congratulations, you are now the owner of the rights to the Weekend at Zuernie’s Project! [glances at juul inhaler, muses to self] I wonder if they make cigar versions of these.

OSZ: I’ve got to be honest, I can’t believe you guys are letting this one go.

RTD: We’re just too busy.

DTZM: Honestly, we didn’t think Cole was going to make a roster anywhere and we’d be able to start filming immediately.

RTD: Yeah, having to push it off to February just meant that we couldn’t keep it on our plate.

DTZM: We’ve just got way too much going on in 2022. [glances at RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY, who shrugs]

OSZ: So what are you going to spend your September and October doing if you’re not filming Zuernie’s?

RTD: Oh, we’ve got some really great stuff going on…

DTZM: Really, really great stuff.

RTD: …but we can’t talk about it right now.

DTZM: It’s all under NDA, you know?

OSZ: Oh, you don’t have to tell me about it, I know how that goes.

The conversation falls silent for a moment.

RTD: Hey, we’re sorry that things didn’t work out for you at Sony.

DTZM: Yeah, tough break.

OSZ: It’s fine, it’s fine.  I’m happier here at the Prayer Warrior Network anyways.

RTD: I didn’t realize there would be big money in a streaming service that caters directly to the entertainment needs of the modern conservative viewer.

DTZM: PWN is such a great acronym, too.  Rolls right off the tongue.

OSZ: It’s gonna be BIG, you guys.  So big.  You have no idea.  And Weekend at Zuernie’s is gonna be our franchise player. We’re talking tentpole, here.

DTZM: We’re really grateful you took it off our hands.

RTD: Well, we’re not that grateful.  I mean, I’m gonna miss working with Cole.

DTZM: Oh, he’s fantastic, you’re gonna love him.

OSZ: Speaking of which, we’re going to need to take delivery of all the preliminary work you guys have done.

DTZM: Of course, of course.  We’ve touched up the script, done all the casting, hired a director, got the tagline written, and we’ve already pinned down the target audience. You can basically phone it in from here.

RTD: There one more thing, though.

DTZM: Oh, that’s right.

OSZ: [raises eyebrows]

RTD: The poster is done.

DARKEST TIMELINE ZACK MORRIS stands up and moves across to the office, positioning his wrist so that the Apple Watch’s camera captures a framed promotional poster.

OSZ: Wow!  I love it.

DTZM: We do too.

RTD: We’re really bummed to let this project go.

DTZM: We really are.

RTD: [sighs] But it’s time to move on to the next one, you know?

DTZM: Speaking of which, we really should get back to work.

OSZ: Of course, of course.  Same here.

RTD: It was, as always, a pleasure doing business with you.

OSZ: You guys take care of yourself, keep those tips frosty, you hear me?

DTZM: We will, we will. So long, buddy.

DARKEST TIMELINE ZACK MORRIS presses a button to end the call, and then saunters over to the couch, where RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY has ascended to a sitting position.  They exchange a high five.

RTD: I can’t believe we actually pulled this off.

DTZM: What, that we unloaded this albatross of a project at a gain, while still collecting our fees for DFO Productions, and still managed to retain executive producer credits as well as ten points on the back end?

RTD: Something like that, yeah.  What a coup!

DTZM: I wouldn’t call it that.

RTD: Then what?  A “regular tourist visit”?

DTZM: [smiles] Why don’t we call it…art?

Today’s theme is: “promotional art”.  We’re looking for songs from albums with covers that qualify as “art” and are either original works or examples of (and/or inspired by) famous pieces or techniques (as the above is reminiscent of a Roy Lichtenstein piece).  Classic forms are art are the best – painting, sculpture – but more modern things like pop art (think Andy Warhol) are good too.  For our purposes here, graphic design and photography are discouraged – if you’re going down that route it had better be something special.  Once again, SonOfSpam correctly identified last week’s “Little Girls” by Oingo Boingo.  I’m not sure he realized he was making a guess about the puzzle, though, I think he just identifies with the protagonist of the song.  Post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=’r1Pr0U6hb0Y and they should embed in the comments after you refresh.  

I should mention that this is the FINAL episode of Request Line of the season – thank you to everyone who has kept coming back every week and making this so much fun!