Special Edition Request Line: Their Just Reward

As most of you know, Request Line is an offseason feature, to help us outlast the drudgery that takes place from February through August. Once in a blue moon, however, there comes such a day that demands a special edition.

Today is one of such days.

I’ve been tracking the deaths of prominent antivaxxers (and some not-so-prominent ones as well). The grandfather of them all was Herman Cain, who scoffed at the dangers of coronavirus to enjoy a (sparsely) attended political rally in Tulsa. He caught coronavirus, went on a ventilator, and died. Didn’t stop tweeting that the virus wasn’t dangerous, though.  Local activist Laura Zuern served as the inspiration for the Weekend at Zuernie’s series. Dick Farrel, Phil Valentine and Marc Bernier get to shake hands with their idol Rush Limbaugh now.  Q-Anon proponent Veronica Wolski now has a pair of eyes in the sky of her very own.  And this brings us to second-tier radio host Bob Enyart.

Bob catapulted to almost-fame by reading the obituaries of gay men who had died from AIDS to the soundtrack of Queen’s “Another One Bites the Dust”.  People like Bob Enyart were the reason I developed homophobic attitudes when I was young.  Modeling the behavior of bigots like him led me to do and say things in my adolescence that still bring me great shame to this very day.  Later, Bob was charged and convicted of child abuse. He called for women who had abortions to face the death penalty.  Most recently, Bob called for people to refuse vaccination shots because he claimed the vaccines were tested on the cells of aborted fetuses.  He sued the state of Colorado over coronavirus-related restrictions on church attendance.  Despite being unvaccinated, Bob Enyart trusted his God and his unprepared immune system to protect him from the most dangerous virus the world has seen in over a hundred years, and blithely engaged in many activities that would be considered “dangerous” for an aging, overweight, goatee-wearing individual such as himself.

So what’s Bob Enyart up to now?

Tell ’em, boys:

Today’s Request Line is dedicated to the willfully unvaccinated members of our society.  You’re encouraged to post songs to celebrate their obstinacy, their stupidity, their embrace of quack cures, and their abject refusal to engage in practices that will make life safer for their fellow members of society should those practices cause them even the slightest bit of inconvenience.  These songs go out to the willfully unvaccinated who have died, are dying, or will die.

So long, Bob. You spent your life selling hatred, and given that your widow or the children you beat haven’t put up a Gofundme page begging for pennies to defray your burial expenses, it seems like you made a pretty good living at it.  Rot in hell for all eternity, you irredeemable piece of shit.