Your Totally English Early Morning NFL Football Open Thread

Welcome friends to this completely mandatory tilt! I hope I didn’t offend any west coasters by referencing the time of day. Welp, we’ve got yet another game featuring Hippo’s beloved Donkos and their airplane aisle-exercising leader. Let’s dig in, shall we?

To The Game!

Broncos/Jags:

-Both teams are dragging their sorry asses through a 4 game losing streak.

-The actual City of London is only 1.3 square miles and has only 7,500 folks living there. Greater London has 8.7 million wankers-all of them-residing within its boundaries.

-Nathaniel Hackett is in over his head and sounds like a character that cobbles shoes in a Dickens novel.

-The city, such as it was, was founded by the Romans in 50 AD and has been known as Ludenwic, Ludenberg and Londonium, which is also the substance that flows through Prince Harry’s bloodstream in my new graphic novel about royal superheroes.

-Wilson is listed as questionable and is regarded as more than a little bit cringey.

-The Great Fire of 1666 wasn’t that great regarding body counts. There were only six verified deaths but I’m guessing then, as now, that the poor didn’t (and can’t) count.

-Trevor Lawrence has a victory overseas-he won last year at Tatertot Hotspur Stadium over the Fins.

-If you wanted to “Eat The Rich!” as the old saying goes, a good place to start your adventure is London, given that approximately 80 billionaires live there.

-Etienne should get all kinds of touches today now that James Robinson has been shipped off to the Jetskis.

-Some of the more ‘colourful’ street names that once existed have been replaced. Places like Pissing Alley, Shiteburn Lane and Gropecunt Lane have been re-named and no one seems to know why.

Have a coffee and enjoy.

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Game Time Decision

Rex Ryan with the flipper. Lol

King Hippo

America’s Back in LOVE with Charmslinger!!

ThePirateSloth

Last night in my hotel, someone pulled a fire alarm at 2am, waking us up with the blaring alarm and automated message something like “fire detected in the bldg, you assholes best evacuate”. I get dressedthru my sleep haze, and go downstairs and outside. 2 things I found funny:
– only about 30-40 people evacuated, out of a 14 story bldg that is practically full
– of those who did evacuate, everyone gathered DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF THE MAIN ENTRANCE

If there had actually been a fire, there’d have been a lot of dead fucking idiots. When the fire trucks showed up, all those people swarmed the firemen asking questions and demanding answers. The fire dept left within 5 mins of arriving.

Fronkenshteen

Manchester United should score in the next five minutes or so.

Horatio Cornblower

Nailed it!

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s fucking great!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

This would be more fun if the Browns were in the Broncos’ shoes because there would be a non-zero chance that they would go for it on 4th down, fumble, and have it returned for a touchdown.

King Hippo

We can keep our Chubb now WOO!!!!!!!

King Hippo

Don’t get cute redux. Hand it off to Murray.

King Hippo

Don’t get cute. Hand it off to Murray.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Garbage time touchdown for Melvin Gordon?

Ha ha, no, just kidding. They wouldn’t let that fumble machine touch the ball at this point.

Col. Duke LaCross

“HE GOT A CAST ON!!!”

Mr. Ayo

That was a great sound grab on the field.

King Hippo

D-O-N-K-S!!!!

#BetterThanIn-com-PLETE

Game Time Decision

So Russ does high knees all the way home in celebration?

Fronkenshteen

Oh these West Ham creamsicle alternate kits. It is to puke!

Horatio Cornblower

I’m a big fan of the Tampa Bay Creamsicles.

These are…not them.

Mr. Ayo

DONKS WOO! left too much time for Prison Girlfriend.

Mr. Ayo

Whoopsie doodles!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Turns out he didn’t need that much time after all!

King Hippo

And I played Latavius in both leagues!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Let Russ Crack!

Spur

Switching to the Metric system appears to be having a positive effect on Russ

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Out of curiosity, how is everyone watching this game? I’ve got a stream of TSN from somewhere in Canada.

Fronkenshteen

I actually have an ESPN subscription that gives me access to ESPN+.

Mr. Ayo

Drunk

Spur

Hulu includes ESPN+

Game Time Decision

Watching TSN in Canada

Game Time Decision

And Canadian commercials suck

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Trust me, they can’t be worse than the “Citizens for Sanity” ads for the GOP that are complaining that Biden is spending too much money supporting Ukraine.

Game Time Decision

My point is more that one sees the same 4 commercials every break, every game all season

Game Time Decision

Kkkkkkhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnn sighting

Game Time Decision

How do you miss 2 open receivers?

Mr. Ayo

That was a most charmless sling that was ever slung.

King Hippo

Prison Girlfriend about dropped the soap.

Horatio Cornblower

Welp, Nottingham Forest will surely dominate the Championship next year, as they probably don’t have to worry about Fulham doing it instead.

King Hippo

The Water Pistols have sommet special cooking, I am telling ya. 2nd in the Table is now your floor, nae ceiling.

Horatio Cornblower

I put a Coke in the freezer to chill it before lunch. This was yesterday. It exploded this morning.

Everyone in the family loves me.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

One of the only things I ever use our Google Spy device for is to set timers when I put sodas in the freezer.

King Hippo

a glass Coke? That’s basically an IED

King Hippo

Let Russ Simmer on Low

Horatio Cornblower

Nottingham Forest’s coach looks like Boris Johnson’s dim-witted cousin.

King Hippo

Chubb gets penetration but no finish