September is such a beautiful time of year, and not just for the “windows down” time in the car.  That does make the outside world a teenier bit MOAR bearable, though.

Also!  We get a proper Saturday morning of footy, with Villa hosting the Trashbirds early (7:30, USA).  I can’t promise I will set my alarm, given all the Friday Night JV NFL (I know the Wolven Sort will irritate me, but Secular Big Love/Niiiiiice Beaver will be worth staying up for.  I think both these sides can manage the “poison chalice” effect of continental footy, but the eagle-eyed media will be on the lookout for signs of slippage.  Punting the domestic cups (as Villa 100% did) was wise.

Speaking of, lookit Everton getting two good results on the spin, including mid-week away to Villa (where they got dry-bummed just a few weeks earlier).  Momentum is the next day’s starting pitcher, though – even against Luton Town (10:00, Peacock).  Much better than August plus the Gooners’ visit, for sure.  Every little bit helps.  Those sticking to teevee can focus on Men Untied/Palace (10:00, USA).  Other fixtures abound for your streaming pleasure.

Humanity needs Spurs to do a Spotlight(ish) Dance good (12:30, USA), so prepare to be disappoint.  I mean, humanity really should be getting used to it.

Only one, mediocre Sunday offering (Robins Hood hosting Praise Beesus, 9:00, USA) – apparently this is due to the Ryder Cup, which just seems silly.  I’d be annoyed, but it’s MANDATORY 14-hour NFL watch anyway.  So…WOO!!!  Less odds of a Kubiak darting ones eyes between screens.

Mighty Whitey get the Trespassers on Monday Night Footy (3:00, USA).  Oh, and Litre gon’ be angry.  BUHLEE DAT!!

Florida (+1) at Kenfucky (Noon, ESPN)

For the life of me, I can’t recall the Blue Moons ever being favoUred in this matchup.  It’s always an absolutely bonkers game, usually with Kenfucky spitting the bit at the end.  I also question the KY offensive line being able to stop the Florida Men’s penetration.  PHRASING.

Texas A&M (-6) at Arkansas (Noon, SECN)

Bonfire Cult finally has the kind of defense that could justify Jimbo’s popgun offense.  But alas, he has already ceded the playcalling.  Call me an SEC homer (guilty-ish, as I don’t even really have a team I support there), but look at the dreck other channels are pushing this window.  Pig Sooey is a cornered animal, and ask any hunter how dangerous a wild hog can be.

Clemson (-6.5) at SillyCuse (Noon, ABC)

YES, I just wanted to point and laugh at Saint Debo.  It will be marginally harder to do this after this week’s savage beating of L’Orange.  But man, an 0-3 conference start would just be too fucking funny.  But SillyCuse does not manage the weight of expectations well.  Assuming they ever have any (sorry, scotchy).

Georgia (-14.5) at Auburn (3:30, CBS)

I think they bill this as the South’s oldest rivalry.  I guess they forgot about “hillbillies v. shoes.”  Or “hillbillies v. literacy.”

Kansas (+16.5) at Texas (3:30, ABC)

Unfortunately, I don’t think John Brown adds to his scalp count this week, but I bet KU hangs around.  Steerfuckers South and their hype machine will annoy the fuck out of Hippo. but such is life.  No shame in napping this window.