Closing a FIne Lesser September – Part teh First

September is such a beautiful time of year, and not just for the “windows down” time in the car.  That does make the outside world a teenier bit MOAR bearable, though.

Also!  We get a proper Saturday morning of footy, with Villa hosting the Trashbirds early (7:30, USA).  I can’t promise I will set my alarm, given all the Friday Night JV NFL (I know the Wolven Sort will irritate me, but Secular Big Love/Niiiiiice Beaver will be worth staying up for.  I think both these sides can manage the “poison chalice” effect of continental footy, but the eagle-eyed media will be on the lookout for signs of slippage.  Punting the domestic cups (as Villa 100% did) was wise.

Speaking of, lookit Everton getting two good results on the spin, including mid-week away to Villa (where they got dry-bummed just a few weeks earlier).  Momentum is the next day’s starting pitcher, though – even against Luton Town (10:00, Peacock).  Much better than August plus the Gooners’ visit, for sure.  Every little bit helps.  Those sticking to teevee can focus on Men Untied/Palace (10:00, USA).  Other fixtures abound for your streaming pleasure.

Humanity needs Spurs to do a Spotlight(ish) Dance good (12:30, USA), so prepare to be disappoint.  I mean, humanity really should be getting used to it.

Only one, mediocre Sunday offering (Robins Hood hosting Praise Beesus, 9:00, USA) – apparently this is due to the Ryder Cup, which just seems silly.  I’d be annoyed, but it’s MANDATORY 14-hour NFL watch anyway.  So…WOO!!!  Less odds of a Kubiak darting ones eyes between screens.

Mighty Whitey get the Trespassers on Monday Night Footy (3:00, USA).  Oh, and Litre gon’ be angry.  BUHLEE DAT!!

Florida (+1) at Kenfucky (Noon, ESPN)

For the life of me, I can’t recall the Blue Moons ever being favoUred in this matchup.  It’s always an absolutely bonkers game, usually with Kenfucky spitting the bit at the end.  I also question the KY offensive line being able to stop the Florida Men’s penetration.  PHRASING.

Texas A&M (-6) at Arkansas (Noon, SECN)

Bonfire Cult finally has the kind of defense that could justify Jimbo’s popgun offense.  But alas, he has already ceded the playcalling.  Call me an SEC homer (guilty-ish, as I don’t even really have a team I support there), but look at the dreck other channels are pushing this window.  Pig Sooey is a cornered animal, and ask any hunter how dangerous a wild hog can be.

Clemson (-6.5) at SillyCuse (Noon, ABC)

YES, I just wanted to point and laugh at Saint Debo.  It will be marginally harder to do this after this week’s savage beating of L’Orange.  But man, an 0-3 conference start would just be too fucking funny.  But SillyCuse does not manage the weight of expectations well.  Assuming they ever have any (sorry, scotchy).

Georgia (-14.5) at Auburn (3:30, CBS)

I think they bill this as the South’s oldest rivalry.  I guess they forgot about “hillbillies v. shoes.”  Or “hillbillies v. literacy.”

Kansas (+16.5) at Texas (3:30, ABC)

Unfortunately, I don’t think John Brown adds to his scalp count this week, but I bet KU hangs around.  Steerfuckers South and their hype machine will annoy the fuck out of Hippo. but such is life.  No shame in napping this window.

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Given that I don’t have anything against Romania, I should probably turn this snuff film off.

herodotus450

Fun* fact**: Auburn was the inspiration for the plot of Goldfinger.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Well, they may be winless so far in the Rugby World Cup and are currently losing 42-0, but Romania has some pretty cool-looking yellow jerseys.

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Horatio Cornblower

I see the US is about to lose the Ryder Cup again. I always like to see that. Golfers just seem like such dicks.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The thing that I dislike most about professional golfers these days are the murderous savages who employ them.

Brick Meathook

I can’t stand the game. I hate the people who play it even more.

(favorite line from KITH)

Horatio Cornblower

Nightime whiskey makes Pat MacAfee throw up.

Oh, I’m sorry, that was “food poisoning.”

bk109

By the way, what’s with the shutdown bollocks that has people hot and bothered a couple of tables over? McCarthy actually found his balls for once and isn’t folding until he does the supposed right thing for his constituents what his internal polling is telling is the more popular option and is going to shut down the Federal government unless the over funding to the Cokehead-in-Charge gets cut?

bk109

the *overt … seriously, what the fuck is wrong with the auto-correct in Chrome this part week. It auto-corrected overtt to “over” !?

Horatio Cornblower

The only thing I know is that the government shutdown would eliminate ‘Fat Bear Week’ and if that happens I am raising a militia and marching on Washington.

Buddy is going to do the same thing, but based largely on a misunderstanding.

Last edited 7 months ago by Horatio Cornblower
bk109

Eh, what’s the worst it could happen? Well, outside of fucking over a lot of people (including the military), turning the US into a bigger joke than it’s been and most importantly – ruin my plans with the missus to see a couple of museums tomorrow.

Brick Meathook

Pathology museum. Silver Spring. Maryland. Very close.

Blah blah blah, you don’t like your coworkers. I get it. Now go do a BOTG. You know where to go.

Brick Meathook

Are you still spouting these avant-garde word salads? Get to the museum, soldier.

yeah right

We’re not impacted this time because we’re under a 10 year contract so we’re fully financed.

It was fucked up in the past though. My crew had to use their PTO to get paid during shut down.

Horatio Cornblower

I see the Trojan’s defense is about as effective as that Trojan I was using nine months before my son was born.

Horatio Cornblower

Fightin’ Horatios take a 17-0 lead, give up the next 24 points, get the ball back with less than 2 minutes left and drive 85 yards to cut it to 34-33, then completely forget to block on the extra point and get it blocked.

I think the Boca Raton Bowl is pretty much out of reach this year.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

I deleted Twitter so there will be a memorial service at Brothers Pizza in Staten Island. In lieu of flowers send packs of granulated garlic.

Horatio Cornblower

Here, have an invite.

bsky-social-a4nd3-2l6f4

Horatio Cornblower

I did not. There’s a few thousand people there, but since the stadium seats 40,000 they’re not showing the crowd.

Brick Meathook

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herodotus450

I haven’t seen Arkansas’ position on something go backwards this much since… well ok, it pretty much happens all the time.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“boO!” – Sarah Huckabee Sanders, disappointed with the team’s performance

Horatio Cornblower

And her new podium.

bk109

Blergh, nothing complements a hangover quite so good as a surprise visit from your spouse while you were trying to sleep off a couple of bottles of stuff.. I’m a bit fuzzy on the details, but I distinctly remember being double-dog-dared to chug one of the bottles of Senaux Blue (or whatever the way that’s spelled) that one of our Frenchie colleagues contributed to our “informal get together… after the mandatory formal one” 😀

bk109

Ah, yes, also a good(?) day (?!) to you fine folks and even finer animals

Brick Meathook

Are you still in DC?

bk109

Yep. And in a moment that proves that military intelligence isn’t an oxymoron, but a debilitating communicable neurological disease… It took me until yesterday afternoon to realize that the goddamn White House’s like a couple of blocks over from me XD Only reason why I found that was ’cause I had some free time and wanted to see Lafayette park (because of a Baldacci novel) and “surprise, motherfucka!” XD

Brick Meathook

Naw I’m in L.A. otherwise I’d take him to Post * on Capitol Hill (BFC’s been there).

You are supposed to go to the Army pathology museum in Silver Spring as I instructed. The museum is FREE and open to the public Wednesday to Sunday 10 a.m.–5 p.m.

I’ve done the legwork for you, now get on the stick and go there and report back with a BOTG. This is not brain surgery, son, although after you see the exhibits you might have a different opinion of that term.

/chop chop

https://medicalmuseum.health.mil/

bk109

He can suggest all he wants, but I’m a free man with his own plans… Or so my wife’s told me, before she rattled the itinerary on what we’re doing the next 48 hours 😀

Brick Meathook

I guess we know who is in command. Fair enough, son. I’m just trying to improve you, and I’m giving you inside info. Take it or leave it.

bk109

Outside of the fact that outside of me somehow “borrowing” Marine One, there ain’t no way in hell to make it to Silver Spring before closing… Your reverse psychology won’t work, for y’see… I don’t mind wifey picking what sights to see, because … well, she repays for my acquiescence of her tourist itineraries with secks and quiet resignation of her own when a low rided with yet another hunk of Cold War surplus “magically” shows up at our driveway

litre_cola

Good morning! My wine, sunstroke and no food hangover is strong. I just turned on the teevee and Wolves beat Citeh, Luton beat Everton and just saw the own goal for Liverpool. If this continues we will beat the trespassers on Monday.

Off to the Maui swap meet!

bk109

Do I want to check the score on my Gooners, or I can skip it for now so I don’t level up my migraine?

bk109

… since my wife’s in a great mood… ManUre? 🙁

bk109

No fucking way

bk109

Yeah, I googled the results and .. both ManUre and Shitty did an oopsie.. Too bad that the other, other Liverpool team shat the bed against the Sp*rs.. Still, surprisingly nice results

Gumbygirl

My Blazers are losing by 1 point to Tulane. About 5 minutes left in the 3rd quarter, and they went for it on 4th and 4 from midfield. Trent Dilfer is…speshul.

WCS

Borderline nobility subscribes to the JJ Watt mantra when it comes to family gatherings, even in MURICKA.

There are zero off days.

Also, I’m quite aware of how this reads with the incest and whatnot, so there’s the low-hanging fruit.

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scotchnaut

“All this talk about attention to fat coaches, and I’m not mentioned? That gets my blood boiling. Just kidding, it’s been at a low simmer for over a decade. I think I might be dying. Can anyone confirm this?”

-Bob Huggins

herodotus450

Ethanol does boil at a lower temperature than water

scotchnaut

Clemson can win all they want today but they’re led by a qb with the last name of Klubnik. As far as making the playoffs are concerned, I’d bet on a team from North Dakota led by Thrust Up-Throttle.

scotchnaut

With regard to the fat coaches below, Daboll has called himself an anxious eater and Reid becomes anxious if he isn’t eating. This is a very important distinction.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Andy Reid gets plenty anxious while he’s eating; out of concern that the food will run out.

WCS

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This scene changed Andy’s life.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

RTD’s hangover (artist’s conception):

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litre_cola

I am here with you hangover friend.

WCS

USC wants to drop a 70 Steamer* on another team from the Rocky Mountain State.

*credit to Brandon Perna

herodotus450

Lamestream media ad campaigns are now trading on the “Andy Reid is fat” trope, time to put her to rest.

scotchnaut

“Let’s find someone else who is fat and make fun of them.”

-Me and the Lamestream media

WCS

/Golden Corral’s doors fly open

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scotchnaut

STOP READING MY MIND, KRESKIN!

Gumbygirl

That’s why he’s AMAZING!

WCS

milkshakes bring the boys to the yard

WCS

We need a Blair Walsh “Nailed It!” Award for punters.

COACHPRIME doesn’t understand special teams, either.

Redshirt
scotchnaut

If you could, please name me a prominent Republican that isn’t a whiny bitch.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’d say that Jeanine Pirro is more “winey” than “whiny”.

Gumbygirl

The dead ones?

Gumbygirl

Nancy has her mouth full.

WCS

BUILD THE CANADIAN WALL

scotchnaut

SillyCuse gets on the board. Clemson’s D is befuddled by play-action.

Redshirt

These USC Trojans, I’m calling them the Democratic Party because I’m only supporting them at the moment due to them being the lesser of two evils.

Horatio Cornblower

Also I don’t like using them but will do so to prevent the birth of a greater evil, in this case the resurgence of Colorado football.

WCS

Colorado is the victim of the disease known Coachprime sarcoma.

2Pack

Enter October

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Fiji in a spot of trouble against Greater Georgia.

scotchnaut

SillyCuse turnover saved by a vicious targeting penalty. The qb might be concussed but at least the Orange still have the ball.

scotchnaut

Wow! Penalty overturned?

Horatio Cornblower

Jack Grealish is a an outstanding value pick in the upcoming “Punchable Faces” draft.

scotchnaut

Man City has lost two in a row. It took a while but my embracing sucky teams has eventually bled into them underperforming. I feel kinda proud right now.

Horatio Cornblower

Doing the Lord’s work, Scotchy.

Horatio Cornblower

Good ol’ Uncle Woy.

Horatio Cornblower

ManUre down 1 to Crystal Palace as we approach full-time, so get ready for 19 minutes of injury time.

Horatio Cornblower

4!?

This isn’t the Premier League I know, but I like it.

Also, let’s go Wolves!

Don T

Tough week, this. TBH, I spent September being overly snide at work and “Again?! [sigh]” in my family obligations. But hey, if it ain’t broke, yadda yadda yadda.
I really, reeeeeally should do administrative work today.
Counterpoint:
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Horatio Cornblower

This week was an absolute bear. I plan to spend a good deal of today napping.

Don T

Yeah… I should direct my hatred towards humanity through invoicing. Tomorrow IS Mandatory after all, so no work on Sunday.
Praise Gamblor.

Don T

“××/xx/23 – Travel Time, (which I told you was billable), to go to your office on yy/yy/23 and review a file you refused to scan and email to me – 2.7”

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m intrigued by those first two x’s, which appear to be the multiplication symbol.

Gumbygirl

Fuck working on weekends.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Honestly, they both seem plenty slimy to me.” – Eli Manning, a card-carrying member of the militant organization known as G.R.O.S.S. (Get Rid Of Slimy girlS)

Horatio Cornblower

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Last edited 7 months ago by Horatio Cornblower
Horatio Cornblower

Just got out of bed. Another cold, rainy day in Connecticut. Today’s goal is to see how long I can pull off this slippers/flannel PJ bottoms/fleece bathrobe look I’ve got going on.

Trip to the gym later might get awkward.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I have given serious consideration to wearing my bathrobe to the pool when I go swimming on days like this (by which I mean 65° and cloudy, which is as miserable as it gets here in Los Angeles).

2Pack

Jeez with the log in each and every visit again chit…

ArmedandHammered

Yep, I just automatically do it every time now when I come to the site.

Gumbygirl

I go back to a post that doesn’t have a lot of comments and do it there. Saves a lot of scrolling.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Robbing other people’s antiquities?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Hobby Lobby also puts in an appearance.

ArmedandHammered

Look, if they are just going to leave them out for other people to pick up, that is there fault.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Is this where I admit my shame in passing out during halftime of the grand final?

2Pack

No man, that’s what the internet is for, just watch it when you get up and can fully enjoy it. Shelter yourself from feeds that will show you the final score, and nobody gets hurt. That’s how I enjoy NFL games over here in the time warp.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I mean, that’s one of the best things about being an AFL fan in the US–no one ever spoils the game for me. But just like I wouldn’t want to watch the Super Bowl on a delay, I wanted to watch the Grand Final live. But the quantity of beers and tacos combined with the hour had other plans…

2Pack

The Super bowl and some playoff games I’ll do an all nighters for.
Over here they give the boys off until 1300 the next day, and the clubs stay open all night in support of just the SB.

Gumbygirl

I watched it until the end. Still don’t get it, but it was exciting!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Based on the final score it looks like it was a hell of a game.

yeah right

No shame in that.
I’m gonna hit the store real quick, get a walk in and then watch it this morning.

2Pack

Napoli wins.

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Horatio Cornblower

She’s got that “I’ll marry you for a visa” look, for sure.

Horatio Cornblower

Aww, man, I got Botswana!

Cecil Rhodes

Greetings, fellow empire builders! I understand that our colleagues over in the Upper and Lower Canadas are in the midst of recognizing a “National Day for Truth and Reconciliation” for uncivilized tribal peoples. Are they insinuating that I should give back all of my diamonds? If so, it looks like I’m not the only one that has enjoyed a few glasses of firewater today!

Brick Meathook

Detroit, 8/31/23

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

oops I meant this one

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Brick Meathook

These are all just kind of lazy shit photos of boarded up buildings. Maybe they’ll be interesting in a year or two. I always frame everybody out of my photos, I’ve done it for years. I dunno.

herodotus450

Probably had a sick vacuum tube system.

ArmedandHammered

“Vacuum tube system – tell me more and are they available for home use?” – The Mrs. RTD, Esq.

2Pack

Sad looking building right there folks

Gumbygirl

Needs a mural.

Horatio Cornblower

There was one exactly like that in Hartford for years. They eventually knocked it down for a parking lot. Then they built a baseball stadium across the street and stole a team from New Britain to put it in it.

The point is to never trust Hartford.

Brick Meathook

I’m still up and working here this early Los Angeles morning, yet it’s still late at night for me. I’m doing a lot of photo editing from my summer back east; I got a few good shots here and there, on two different platforms so that complicates it a bit.

Say “hi” if you’re awake, I could always use the company.

2Pack

Ciao Buddy

scotchnaut

Work those photos, baby. Work ’em hard!

2Pack

Morning y’all.
You never appreciate how much you use your index finger to navigate your android, until you hack the shit out of it requiring a huge bandage.
So I’m conversing with y’all today using the fuck you finger.
Hoping Marika can make it better here soon when Napoli plays. Low cut and plenty of deep bending please Cara.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Yeah, you never really appreciate your fingers until it’s too late.” – Jason Pierre-Paul

Last edited 7 months ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly