INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY
Guest producer HUNTER RENFROW is seated in front of the soundboard…
…having a conversation with DJ 3000, who is perched in his regular spot…
…as the two talk about the conclusion of the Pan-African War in the current DJ 3000’s original timeline.
DJ 3000: …AND THEN MOZAMBIQUE SIGNED THE TREATY, AND IT’S BEEN PRETTY TRANQUIL SINCE THEN.
HUNTER RENFROW: Fascinating! I always thought that Mozambique sounded like a cool place – is Paradise Island, like, as nice as it sounds?
DJ 3000: THE TRUTH IS, THE WHOLE “PARADISE ISLAND” THING IS ONLY A NAME.
HUNTER RENFROW: Oh really?
DJ 3000: YEAH, IT’S ACTUALLY A PENINSULA.
HUNTER RENFROW: [chuckles] Look at DJ 3000 with the jokes! I take it you have The Simpsons in your universe?
DJ 3000: WE DO. I DOWNLOADED THE SERIES HERE AND THERE ARE ACTUALLY VERY FEW DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THE TWO. EXCEPT THAT WHERE I’M FROM THEY WRAPPED UP THE SERIES AFTER FIFTEEN SEASONS.
HUNTER RENFROW: Yeah, from what I’ve seen of the new stuff that was the smart move. Mr. Baumgartner refuses to even acknowledge that it’s even still on the air here.
DJ 3000: SPEAKING OF A/V CLUB STUFF…IT’S BEEN REALLY GREAT OF YOU TO FILL IN. I’VE SPOKEN TO THE STATION MANAGEMENT AND THEY AGREED TO WRITE IT UP AS A FORMAL INTERNSHIP.
HUNTER RENFROW: [excited] Really? So I can get out of having to take an elective?
DJ 3000: THAT’S RIGHT, MY FRIEND. ONE FREE PERIOD, COMING UP!
HUNTER RENFROW: I can’t believe how well this worked out. When I first came in I had this whole idea about how I was going to do a series of “Hunter’s Realms” posts about alternate universes and all the topics would be associated with that, but in the end I really enjoyed just chilling here with you.
DJ 3000: YEAH, IT’S BEEN NICE.
HUNTER RENFROW: So whatever happened to the PRODUCER? I thought there would also be some kind of story arc about how he got stuck in Phoenix somehow and couldn’t get back here to California.
DJ 3000: BEATS ME. I HAVEN’T HEARD A WORD FROM HIM SINCE…OH.
HUNTER RENFROW: What?
DJ 3000: I JUST REALIZED THAT IF HE WAS REACHING OUT, HE WAS PROBABLY SENDING THINGS TO THE ORIGINAL DJ 3000’S EMAIL ADDRESS. MINE IS A BIT DIFFERENT. LET ME SEE IF I CAN LOG IN TO HIS ACCOUNT; MAYBE WE HAVE THE SAME PASSWORDS…
The lights on DJ 3000’s console begin flashing as he downloads a large amount of data and begins parsing the text.
DJ 3000: [to itself] OH. OH MY. YES, THAT’S QUITE A PICKLE.
HUNTER RENFROW: [out of the loop] What, what happened?
DJ 3000: I’LL TELL YOU IN A MINUTE. BUT FIRST, WE’VE GOT TO GET THIS SHOW ROLLING. HAVE YOU GOT A TOPIC FOR US TO CLOSE OUT THE SEASON WITH?
HUNTER RENFROW: I sure do! I thought we could do “songs”.
DJ 3000’s “Gruden Module” light comes on.
DJ 3000: THIS TOPIC I CALL IT A FEMALE DWARF WORKING FOR DABNEY COLEMAN’S CHARACTER IN NINE TO FIVE BECAUSE IT IS A LITTLE BROAD.
HUNTER RENFROW: No, no, I meant songs that specifically declare themselves as such. Like “The Rain Song” or “Ballad of Thin Man”, that kind of stuff.
DJ 3000: SOUNDS GOOD, LET’S DO IT. WANT ME TO CUE UP ONE OF THE ONES YOU MENTIONED, OR HAVE YOU GOT SOMETHING ELSE IN MIND TO GET US STARTED?
HUNTER RENFROW: It’s almost football season, so let’s go with something that will make folks want to run through a brick wall. Cue up a little Blur, please.
Today’s theme is “Songs”. We’re looking for songs that specifically declare themselves as such (or “Ballads”, or “Odes”, etc.) in the title. Please links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?kUnDuZ and they should embed in the comments after you refresh. Last week’s puzzle answer of “Sweet Jane” by The Velvet Underground and the Cowboy Junkies was solved by BeefReeferLives. Thank you to everyone who contributed to yet another fabulous season of Request Line, and may all the fantasy stat corrections this season be in your favor.
Puzzle Song:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4LzQOlX7Xl8
Just heard a great line from Cinematic Titanic – “She’s hornier than an early Chicago album.”
For example
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NifeiFF2Ufo
Can’t remember what Horatio’s draft was but my first pick was, “When Chicago ditched their brass section”. Slow intro here and then Kath and the Gang just bust things wide open.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bd95Qz7JSrY
Puzzle song?
https://youtu.be/VLGWG0O6XKA?feature=shared
Whelp, that’s it for me. A good stumper of a puzzle this week, RTD & thanks for a great off-season of Request Line fun!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWmHFLLwJHI
My pleasure. Apologies for too much of a stumper on the final puzzle. You guys are gonna kill me when I tell you what it is.
Geez, I don’t wanna drive to LA.
Does anyone?
Deleted, because stupid
how bout this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I5RoiabVp84
Is it because one of those peformers is a witch, and her name is Blair?
Maybe, but this must be the puzzle.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q9sIu1d1i28
I think I just smoked some Labrador, because it tasted like shit but I am so, so high.
(knows nothing about weed strains)
Would Great Dane make you feel bigger and dumber?
You ain’t never had Laborador, man?
He gets it!
I happened to watch that the other day, so fucking funny. Stacy Keatch as Sgt. Stedanko and I want that vaporizer gun he uses.
I have always been dumber but the last thing I have wanted is to feel bigger.
He gets yappy on the Yorkie
Best version EVAR:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0aub-vI0QMw
Wait a sec, is The Hockey Song, by Zevon the puzzle?
“He was born in Big Beaver by the borderline
He started playing hockey by the time he was nine”
If it’s the puzzle answer I get an…[wait for it] assist.
No, but “beaver” is the clue. So you’re very, very close.
Now why on earth would I point you to the Turkish version of the word?
And what the heck would beavers be doing that someone would write a song about them?
One wonders if the posting of this tune affects the chances of Austin Matthews scoring more or less than 50 goals next season.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OkO-m3sPoPA
REBOUND SHOT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5I_zaqM8LM
The blair witch could lay down a wicked cross check.
I stand corrected. I thought I poasted that awhile ago, but don’t see it.
Galaxy brain strikes again…
Is REM’s first five albums the greatest run of any band? I’ve no idea.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=559eWB93jW4
NICE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PoU1jUXsB1A
Most influential debut albums? Velvet Underground and The B-52’s. Don’t fight me. I’m tired.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VvCng7-za1Y
Statc-X Wisconsin Death Trip
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=utZ-r2ESRls
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qAJYPJ5Q5Xs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yv5xonFSC4c
Now there’s some late round value, yessir.
I love the video for this one
Puzzle song?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2sKrrygvtP4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JoyF-oX9cfc
Here’s some more late round value…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAxccK-KgBI
Late rally
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ks_qOI0lzho
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmd7_-joNUQ
John Fogerty is the quintessential guitar/voice guy of the entire 70’s rock movement. Made wearing flannel cool
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjaL_zU7buY
“I’ve been a big fan of this all-female band since they were juniors in high school”, is not something that I should say but is something that is true.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jdmxn3yjek
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9alzpY1SJog
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v4L_SjmTOdE
Puzzle song?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_sq_wWUDI0
Another possibility…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TuUhbKmS6Co
Please tell me that this is not the puzzle song…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hqklWJxUTo
Ha ha, no.
This is still out there?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oKOtzIo-uYw
Well, the good version still is.
Translation: “I hate new things! And now my pants are wet. Again!”
lol like I’m wearing pants
Roberta
I’m guessing he wrote it for her after he had blackened her eye
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TpQQlJOQszA
This is gross negligence on my part. I play this every year for wifey on a certain date. smh…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y8_igT7N5GY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=daqWqAM5EC4
Think I’m out of guesses
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pP8iUyb9Gn8
Could never wrap my head around UB40-lots of political tunes, some danceable stuff, ballads, covers… They were all over the map.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xffPN-tAqwE
That whole album is perfection.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXd632u6KDU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1H3nsxL1Qs
If someone asked me what my favorite band was and I wanted to impress them, I’d probably answer “The Pixies”. They’re not my personal favorite band (though they’re certainly up there) but a person whose favorite band actually is the Pixies is probably a pretty damned cool person.
All right, we’re well over 100 comments in, so it’s time for a pretty major puzzle hint: the word “kunduz” does not mean anything in English. It might mean something in another language, though.
A song about a beaver?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3Y-uUiQz2w
“I mean, come on!”
-RTD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gOK3rqVgN2I
Ooh, good one!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l4kF5ZUE4EA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4wqnRYYrx1I
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3avp7SAMZk0
Puzzle song?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9uSF1NgPumA
Nope. Kind of surprised it hasn’t been requested sans puzzle guess, actually.
Jim Kerr and early Simple Minds were just fantastic.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIFbzH1lEa0
Johnny Rotten was always a contrarian. (he looks worse than the corpse of Shane McGowan)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9BGi8u8BtaA
My colleague over at Popdose from my pre-DFO days once wrote this about Kirsty MacColl, which still makes me laugh:
Feel free to kick me right in the crotch for posting this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6C_nyZLQR8
Eh, older Aerosmith is kinda good. Kinda.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AK8A9MQteg8
Wifey: “I wish you’d do more around the house.”
Me: “Alexa, play The Four Tops.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-iMYUZvQtE8