GHOSTS ON THE GROUND – 5 – HAUNTED HOUSE

Lost in another revolting night filled with Korean exploitation horror films, when suddenly it hits, why off to the internet I did scamper.

Typed in haunted houses in my city and guess what happened?

Do you believe in ghosts?

Yes you, well?

I read somewhere (or could have just made it up) that more than 50% of all Americans do in fact believe in some sort of afterlife.

You ever hear of the “Black Dahlia”? She of the real original Joker smile?

How about walking down Hollywood boulevard?

Ever seen the ghost of Bela Lugosi?

Me neither. Now I’ve been down the boulevard many a time but have never been privileged (pronounced- Bay La not Bell ah) to see the count floating in the sky, although that would be lovely.

Want to be famous like that sad storied young lady of yesteryear? Climb up on the H and leap into forever.

Yes, good eye. It was indeed used in an earlier work. But also notice the new art work that took seconds too do.

What did the internet tell me?

Less than 1 mile from my very own front door awaits a gaping wound of horror torn right into the modern world of today. Filled with, spectral lights, nauseating odors, disembodied voices followed by full floating head apparitions. A “real haunted house” that close in proximity to where my very own pillow and nightly terrors occur?

Cool.

Bring on the scary old man apparition!

You want some back story? Dude it’s on the internet, ah damn it.

Happened in 1988 and early 89. According to legend, a nice lady received many a-haunts, several caught on camera as they were actually happening. Garnering so much hype and attention that the story appeared on several daytime reality T.V. shows of the era. Eventually a documentary was shot and is available on all your favorite grave robber websites.

The gentleman in the video says of the more than 1000 paranormal investigation he has done, this one was part of a handful of what he called, “Not solvable.” To this I reply, and I quote my old man when I say this, “Horse Hockey!”

After doing bounteous amounts of research and swallowing deliriously large quantities of alcohol. It was decreed by powers beyond my grasp that I must visit this unholy contaminated ground myself.

LOOKS LIKE HOME

Now comes the dopey questions.

Can I spend an afternoon full of free floating absurdity? Will it be too much? Will I flee in mortal horror afraid of my coming demise? Will I giggle uncontrollably to the fact that my life has become such a farce?

Do you believe in the great beyond?

I MYSELF DO NOT

So now reader we have reached that moment called the botheration, is it real or is it paramnesia?

Who cares?

Sometimes it’s just fun to do the weird.

YOU TELL ME YOU DON”T SEE THE FACE OF HELL IN THAT WINDOW AND I’LL DECRY LIAR!

Ghost hunting? Jesus, you really have fallen to a new low.

So a quick disclaimer. Yes it is a “real” piece of property. Which also means someone actually lives there. Simple reason would also say that if you walk up on someones proper abode like a damn fool tourist, taking fanboy photos?

HEY, IS THAT THE “PILLAR”?

Well that now means that said owner has a right to shoot your damn fool pecker (or close proximity) clean off.

I parked down the street as to not draw any unwanted eyeballs on my venture. What is that address again?

Hey kids look, that number no longer exist, of course it doesn’t. God Damn it.

I find myself back home to find out which house it really is. Watching the video more closely this time I notice, a pillar holding up the left side of the structure. Now for the second time this week back to try and find the “real” terror from beyond.

Slowly I approached and just casually walked past, nothing to see her folks just an old wandering drunk. Got to the end of the street turned and eased on back towards the hell portal, just a sauntering fella out doing his dailies not looking for ghosts, oh no, not me.

Take my time walking back to my car. Looking around watching for anything. Everything is quiet and serene. I reach into my car and grab my camera. Looking about I do the unthinkable. I turn and walk back, right into the discarnate world my mind has created.

This time it feels like the universe itself is vibrating, a constant hum coming from the very ground.

Just a trash truck on the next street?

Thinking back on it now as I write this, it’s harder to pretend that it didn’t happen.

A New hero rises from the fires. I call it “Stick Ghost”

I turn and take the photo you see above when I hear from behind me a simple, quick, Hey!

I turn expecting to see the owner saying, “What are you doing?”

I was just going to reply with some, “Sorry. I am sure you get sick of seeing this kind of silliness all the time” but as I turned to speak, no one was there. Turned right then left, nothing.

Slightly startled. I grab my camera when this time there is no doubt. I clearly, distinctly hear a man’s voice say, “Hey you!”

Quickly I turned, maybe from someone in a home barking at me from a window, I surmise. Again as before, nothing to see in any direction.

Nice quiet, empty mid-morning Southern California street.

Dude, I would pay good American cash to get up in that tasty dish

According to the silly video a lot of the real “icky” stuff happened up there. The hanging and the sounds but the old man was said to inhabit the daughters room.

What, you’re still here?

I did so find it.

However it has been completely rebuilt. Leaving it looking nothing like the original. You ever try to find where O.J. got greasy? It’s the same thing, all of the numbers on the streets have been changed to keep goobers like me away, good luck.

Did I have an ectoplasmic anal delight?

Did I touch the face of,

I KNOW. I SEE IT ALSO

Anything?

Well no.

No cold sensation, no lunatic laughing (what’s with people saying there was laughter? Dude, I’m dead, super not funny) children, nothing. Scariest thing was how much traffic was on the constant move. Total failure again, What’s a girl to do?

Still willing to pursue the impossible specter. I think maybe if one didn’t work maybe a place full of haunted houses might.

A place filled with known haunts, heck it’s been on T.V. so we win this time.

Heritage Square it’s to be.

The constant battering of Gorgoroth, Bauhaus and Skinny Puppy has kept me frightened, enlightened and aloof.

One of the photos from above is the wrong house. I shot it during the first adventure, but I like the shot.

DJ Lar Feb-Mar 2025

No I did not take the banner photo, my daughter took it. She said I could use it.

I have been to Maine just not to Steve’s house.

See

THAT MAY BE THE MOST “MAINE” PHOTO I’VE EVER SEEN!