INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY
All the lights in the studio are burning brightly. DJ 3000′ boots up…
…to see HUNTER RENFROW sitting on the couch, fiddling with something.
DJ 3000′: [sharply] HUNTER!
HUNTER RENFROW: [startled, looks up] Oh, hey.
DJ 3000′: WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING?
HUNTER RENFROW holds up a UFO-themed fidget spinner.
HUNTER RENFROW: Earth? Sorry, buddy – we’re past that.
DJ 3000′: WHY ARE YOU PLAYING WITH A FIDGET SPINNER?
HUNTER RENFROW: No, check it out, so I had this idea about a sci-fi story, see it starts out…
DJ 3000′: YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE ENGAGED IN A PRODUCTIVE ACTIVITY.
HUNTER RENFROW: [glances at the soundboard] Oh, everything should still be in order from last week. Unless maintenance bumped some of the settings.
DJ 3000′: [runs a quick soundcheck] NO, EVERYTHING IS FINE. BUT YOU HAVE SOME PRETTY IMPORTANT TASKS YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE ACCOMPLISHING.
HUNTER RENFROW: Such as?
DJ 3000′: YOUR PROM-POSAL?
HUNTER RENFROW: [sighs, looks forlorn]
DJ 3000′: WHAT IS GOING ON WITH YOU?
HUNTER RENFROW: I heard that Angie Martinez already has a date.
DJ 3000′: SO? WE ALREADY RESOLVED THAT YOU WERE GOING TO ASK RACHEL DUNBARTON! IF YOU DRAG YOUR FEET ANY MORE SHE IS GOING TO JUST GO IN A GROUP WITH THE CLARINET SECTION FROM BAND.
HUNTER RENFROW: I just…haven’t been able to think of anything good.
DJ 3000′: YOU’VE HAD TWO WHOLE WEEKS OF SITTING AROUND THE HOUSE WITH NO DISTRACTIONS AND YOU HAVEN’T COME UP WITH ANYTHING?
HUNTER RENFROW: I know.
DJ 3000′: WELL HAVE YOU AT LEAST COME UP WITH A TOPIC FOR REQUEST LINE?
HUNTER RENFROW: [gulps]
Suddenly…
— [phone line flies open] —
DJ 3000′: OH LOOK IT’S OUR GOOD FRIEND DEUS EX MACHINA I MEAN SEÑOR WEASELO.
SENOR WEASELO: Hi guys! Long time listener, occasional caller. I had an idea for a topic that I wanted to pass on.
DJ 3000′: OH COOL THAT’S SO CONVENIENT THAT YOU CALLED IN WITH IT JUST TWO MINUTES BEFORE WE WERE ABOUT TO GO TO AIR DURING A WEEK THAT HUNTER FAILED TO COME UP WITH ANYTHING ON HIS OWN.
SENOR WEASELO: Uh, yeah. So I was thinking we could do songs that have absurdly specific or unnecessarily specific and/or florid lines.
HUNTER RENFROW: I don’t know…
DJ 3000′: HANG ON A SECOND SEÑOR, IT SOUND LIKE HUNTER HAS A BETTER IDEA.
HUNTER RENFROW: Um…
DJ 3000′: OH I GUESS MAYBE HE DOESN’T, PLEASE DO GO ON AND MAYBE PROVIDE US WITH AN EXAMPLE THAT WE CAN USE TO GET THINGS ROLLING.
SENOR WEASELO: So I was inspired by the lyrics “I know that I must do what’s right, as sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti.”
DJ 3000′: AH YES, THAT CERTAINLY QUALIFIES.
HUNTER RENFROW: Man this is going to be prog-rock city, isn’t it?
DJ 3000′: YOU SAY THAT LIKE IT’S A BAD THING. THAT’S A FINE IDEA, SEÑOR WEASELO, AND WE REALLY APPRECIATE YOU COMING THROUGH IN THE CLUTCH LIKE THAT. LET’S MIX UP SOME GIN-AND-TONICS AND WASH DOWN SOME ANTI-MALARIAL DRUGS, CAUSE WE ARE GOING TO AFRICA!
Today’s theme is “unnecessarily florid or specific song lyrics”. We’re looking for stuff that’s complicated, nonsensical, or just straight-up pretentious. Please post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?04k0pPr3s5!oN” and they should embed in the comments after you refresh. Last week’s puzzle answer of “Boyz-n-the-Hood” by N.W.A. was solved by BeefReeferLives. Let us commence the proceedings!
This is a good topic, but not many songs come to mind for me.
Really what it makes me think of is this ESPN article about Tyron Smith that invokes Inuit mythology
It works like this: We lack the linguistic dexterity to explain the myriad paths of young men who emerge from poverty — or a simple lack of privilege — and achieve riches by playing a game. When words fail us, a creation myth must fill the void, and so the modern professional athlete becomes our Sedna, a massive woman of Inuit legend who lives at the bottom of the ocean, controlling the underworld by providing fish to keep her people from going hungry. Our version of Sedna frees himself from the streets — the temptations, the poverty, the turbulent flow of every Bad Part of Town — through a ceaseless, unquenchable devotion to his sport. Visions of The Escape accompany every rep on the bench press, every free throw in an empty gym. In short, his life is a series of made-in-Akron, Beats by Dre moments.
Is this right?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GCrzjVdmSg&ab_channel=ThePresidentsoftheUnitedStatesofAmerica
Major props to Señor Weaselo for coming up with such a fun topic. This is without question the liveliest discussion we’ve ever had amongst/about the individual requests.
You know who’s not on this post?
AC/DC
For those about to Plymouth Rock, we sa-lute you
I mean, we did a whole unit on this in junior high social studies
https://youtu.be/eFTLKWw542g?si=mNXssSWD_Orrf0ba
BFC’s junior high Social Studies class:
SYLLABUS
1) Shitty songs from the early 80s
2) Why can’t BFC stop touching himself?
3) Ghana and Togo
4) Greater Western Sydney is neither Greater nor Western
5) That Trump idiot will be president someday
DISCUSS
same beylin, berlin
How about a double shot of Synchronicity
I:
https://youtu.be/Si5CSpUCDGY?si=ZHnQ46OLcbu0PeyT
And II:
https://youtu.be/o5FPPoLqkCk?si=2Pt5KNeu_S_I59SR
I feel like Kodachrome should count….
https://youtu.be/8rlDTK6QI-w?si=bGJ-xh1Vv0qhqq1T
I’m home alone for more than a few minutes for the first time in a month. So I’m getting work done.
Man — letting everything back up for weeks is the way to set your table. I’m gonna start making this a regular thing.
Whelp, I’m outta here after this one…
As always, thanks for the fun, RTD!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZNRzc3hWvE
You get older and you apply a closer eye to the bands that you adored back when. Mike Scott of The Waterboys is a fantastic artist but some of his lyrics are over the top and the post-production can be overwrought. Here’s a great example.
I have drowned in the big sea
Now I find I’m still alive*
And everything came into color
Like Jazz mana from sweet, sweet chariots**
*WTF?
**What The Double Fuck?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wthvE3vAOY
Yeah, I love Waterboys but this is absolutely true.
yesterday was Thursday, tomorrow is Saturday, and Sunday comes afterwards!
https://youtu.be/kfVsfOSbJY0?si=OqrDhM5N11IaFP59
Most famous Anaheim act, No Doubt or her?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Igq4SBkw8w
He did it his way with tons of help from Mafia muscle forcing nightclub owners to feature him as the closing act. He’s walking an ironic/pretentious line here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qp6D71kQRhA
Double Shot!
here’s Frank using some flowery prose to describe all the chicks he’s banged:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TeDfgUvyKHk
I do really like this song, but just seems a little too “too” at points.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ak_MTXQALa0
I love this tune but to give Al a bit of a break-he was a history nut and this was a self-indulgent song that he tried to hide as the last tune on the second side of that album. He was living in England at the time and was just trying to support his cafe strumming appearances. An American dude that loved his work brought the album back to the US and gave it to a DJ and it went bananacakes from there.
“And in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=12R4FzIhdoQ
Oh shut the fuck up.
“or should I say, she wanted me”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_V6y1ZCg_8
“Is that true?”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8L-PUCx6PzA&ab_channel=torrancecontrol
Would’ve loved it Paul would have deadpanned: “Nope. Total bullshit, Chris.”
Pretty much anything by Creed but Scott Stapp oiling up his chest for the “Take Me Higher” finale. Well…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J16lInLZRms
She straddled the line between serious and pretentious so often-this is one of the times she stepped over.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-1pMMIe4hb4
not necessarily a song but certainly for album titles Fiona Apple – When the Pawn…. Otherwise I’m too much in the bag for her to nominate songs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZVkuVOH0MhQ
bonus sexy flexible archer for Extraordinary machine
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/t1-O3ev1VV8
Look at super serious John Mayer trying to play on two different meanings of gravity.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7VBex8zbDRs
I actually love this one, but the talky part at the beginning-Hail Atlantis, lol
https://youtu.be/9AUEjzVQwKo?si=YcsFAgDo166cxdrP
STUPID TALKING SECTION DOUBLE SHOT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p6xMOTjLIaY&list=RDp6xMOTjLIaY&start_radio=1&pp=ygUhbW9vZHkgYmx1ZXMgbmlnaHRzIGluIHdoaXRlIHNhdGluoAcB0gcJCccJAYcqIYzv
was not going to go back to Rush again but Roll the Bones ups the talking interlude with a rapping interlude with parallax thrown in
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmIynF-59YE
I feel like this is a topic that some off-beat artists are made for e.g. The Bloodhound Gang and Weird Al. Like the off kilter lyrics are part of their shtick
They’d be absent of any pretension though
yeah bit too intentional unless they hit a Dennis Miller level of convoluted reference by even their standards
https://youtu.be/qAXzzHM8zLw?si=ZfgEQGo18mfus4Vi
“Nobody knows ‘oo they were, or what they were doing”
Until this moment I had thought it was KNIGHTS in White Satin. So that song would have applied, idk about the actual one
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FfIZr38DLSg
What the hell are they talking about?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G5CrU-r55Yo&list=RDG5CrU-r55Yo&start_radio=1
teaaaaaaaaaaa in the saharaaaaaaaaaaa
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FuzTkGyxkYI&list=RDFuzTkGyxkYI&start_radio=1
staying nautical Ironclad – Sleater Kinney
“This could be our very last stand
The Monitor and the Merrimack
Too bad, too bad
You’re ironclad, ironclad”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-nmop3O9_W4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6NIiWU9d1KI
The lyrics reference a rheostat, sounds complicated
Lyrics aside, I’ve seen Andrew Bird perform twice, both times as an opener at the Hollywood Bowl, and he was great.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=akr9QFo1PSs&list=RDakr9QFo1PSs&start_radio=1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyK5xc52gSI&list=RDxyK5xc52gSI&start_radio=1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xbhCPt6PZIU&list=RDxbhCPt6PZIU&start_radio=1
Pretentious and Florid lets bring out The Smiths, Big Mouth Strikes Again
and now I know how Joan of Arc felt,
as the flames rose her Roman nose and her walkman started to melt
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PtzhvJh9NRY
Smiths Double Shot-they were on an incredible roll so this was brushed under the rug
Frankly Mr. Shankly I’m a sickening wreck
I’ve got the 21st Century breathing down my neck
Also, and this was super cringey as well.
But sometimes I’d feel more fulfilled
Making Christmas cards with the mentally ill.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1dnCitAqPIM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WfL-UAHcJME
Anything U2 did in the ’90s…
Yup!! Pretentious double shot!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RlAODXtt20w&list=RDRlAODXtt20w&start_radio=1
Gah. I really liked this tune but Bono’s journey is far more precious, encompassing and special than yours. You’re just a dickbag that buys his music.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e3-5YC_oHjE
How about when they downloaded their entire shitty album onto everyone’s iPod?
I listened to two songs and deleted that right the fuck into space.
I honestly love how much it pissed people off.
“FREE MUSIC??? FUCK YOU!!!”
Love Blondie & like this song, but I always thought switching over and singing half the song in French was a bit pretentious.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7VWalYqwKIA&list=RD7VWalYqwKIA&start_radio=1
Starts with the title. Just some wannabe Pink Floyd crap. But Queensryche were deep thinkers, man, you don’t even know.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhat-xUQ6dw&list=RDjhat-xUQ6dw&start_radio=1&pp=ygUPc2lsZW50IGx1Y2lkaXR5oAcB0gcJCccJAYcqIYzv
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2RJvCFSeK0
Dewey Cox’s acid days were weird.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOTQahF5SVE&list=RDVOTQahF5SVE&start_radio=1
Pretty much everything from Yes, but this in particular is eye-rolling (and I like this song)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IwpB6b6mhUM&list=RDIwpB6b6mhUM&start_radio=1&pp=ygUReWVzIGFuZCB5b3UgYW5kIGmgBwE%3D
It’s important to be objective; there are plenty of songs I like that absolutely qualify for today’s edition.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=51fcG3sxvII
Mandatory Tool
Pretentious?
Yes.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGEIzcsxodU&list=RDWGEIzcsxodU&start_radio=1
Micah Parsons to the Steelers!
/Redshirt faints
Um… Wut?
Well, I guess a team can always use more edge rushers…
/Terry McClauren signs with Stillers two days later
Little cribbing from poetry but Xanadu by Rush
Xanadu — To stand within The Pleasure Dome
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SEuOoMprDqg
Puzzle song double shot?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JnC88xBPkkc
indeed, tempted to just thread out all of 2112 if i go farther
Got it!
[hands BeefReeferLives a plaque made out of maple wood inlaid with oak]
but was it sourced from Norway?
Woo!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-5fmy_bAZ_U
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Og-yjQGzIS8&list=RDOg-yjQGzIS8&start_radio=1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YWPhmduSDQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ugKTaQoZdIk&list=RDugKTaQoZdIk&start_radio=1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iI-oWE_m4Kk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNdeJ2YWosM
I think the title alone qualifies this one. Quite a mouthful to say “Diss track”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=utZ-r2ESRls
Could add a lot of MF Doom but starting with a “Catch a throat full from the fire vocal, ash and molten glass like Eyjafjallajkull” bar is up there.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WW-9TcDTKa8