I learn so many interesting things from my trans-Atlantic imaginary frenemies (ie, NSNO – the Everton message board), but this is the tidbit that might have finally broken me beyond reason.  Kashyap Patel is apparently a Redshite supporter.  NOW, do you believe me about this…monstrosity masquerading as a football club being the font of all that is evil?

Merseyside Derby is this morning, bright and early (7:30, USA).  I’m already furious as I write this (Wednesday evening),

Brighton and Spurs highlight the 10:00 window, but is streaming-only.  The telly brings one Palace/Rum Ham (USA).  Meh.  USA also has an afternoon doubleheader (ie, no true Spotlight Dance), with Men Untied/Ckelski (12:30) followed by Mighty Whitey in a neighboUrhood clash with Praise Beesus (3:00).

Sunday’s triple header ends with the much-anticipated City of Men/King’s Afrikan Water Pistols clash (11:30, Peacock).  I wish I had MOAR to say by way of preview…but again.  BORKEN.

Guns Up!! (+3.5) at Team Secular Big Love (Noon, Fox)

Very interesting matchup between two perpetually interesting (but never quite over-the-hump) programs.  Winner has the inside track on meeting Cornpone State in the Twaaaaallllllvvvvve championship game.

Pig Sooey (-7.5) at Fightin’ Mister Pickles (Noon, ABC)

Arkansas gave Johnny Reb a fight last Saturday, but methinks they blew their load and will be ripe for the picking here.  Will we get a new Mister Pickle drawing from the game??

SMU (+6.5) at Blood FOAR teh Bloodeyes God (Noon, ESPN2)

Games between the “minor” Texas squadrons are always interesting.  Lots and lots of offense.  TCU gave us the Week Zero Belicheat humiliation, so I’mma root for them.

War Damn Eagle (+6.5) at Steerfuckers North (3:30, ABC)

2024 wet farts that have started 3-0 and seem legimiately like they could be much better – but put the emphasis on COULD.  We don’t really know yet, and this week will be the first of many tests.  Probably a fun watch, at least.

Tulane (+13.5) at Johnny Reb (3:30, ESPN)

Tulane beat their former QB and his Dookies last week, so this will be more of a “free hit” from their vantage point/  Johnny Reb has no defensing unit to speak of, so pound the over.

Michigan (-2.5) at Nebraska (3:30, CBS)

I can only imagine how much of a grind this one will be.  Should be sponsoUred by Grindr when u think about it no ofence.

NC State (+3.5) at Duke (4:00, ESPN2)

Want to know what Hippo will be watching?  This.  I can feel my mood darkening, quicker than I can type.  Since my Wolven Sort didn’t rake-step “away” to Wake Forest, I am terrified about the potential for “away” to Duke.  In quotes because at least 70% of the crowd will be in red and white (and sometimes black), supporting Charlie Brown U.  We are loyal af, and by that yes I mean stupid.