Last Full JV Night Thread

Man, am I ever going to miss this feeling.  Of having the multitudes for FITBAW sustenance.  But for every season, yada yada.  As Sir Anthony Hopkins (as CS Lewis) said in Shadowlands, the sorrow now is part of the joy then.  That was a really good moviefilm.

Ballsy: It will not surprise you to know that I’ve never seen this film. If it’s not a comedy or if it doesn’t have gratuitous nudity, I’m not interested.

Florida State (-6.5) at Florida (7:00, ESPN)

The Florida Men are a hot mess, with meth mouth.  Semenholes lost their starting QB/talisman of their turnaround last weekend.  Sommet’s got to give, and I am not sure what.  Gators could quit after blowing that late lead after Mizzou, or respond angrily.

Ballsy: Florida girls are hot.

West By God Virginia (-8.5) at Baylor (7:00, FS1)

A fine renaissance year for Fuckers du Cousins concludes in Waco, where they are Just Asking Questions funny how u have a problem with that regarding Dave Aranda’s shittastrophe of a 2023 season.  I wonder if maybe that jerb comes open after all.

Clemson (-7) at South Cakalaky (7:30, SECN)

Remember what I said earlier about underdogs with bowl qualification on the line?  Well, that’s South Cakalaky.  And they’re at home.  And Clemson already feels like maybe they climbed out of their hole beating Blue Carolina last week (7th win, also ensured .500 in ACC play).  And YES, that is what they call U*NC in the state of South Cakalaky.  My folks lived outside of Charleston for several years, and were quite amused by this.  Also by the reaction when they first showed up to vote and asked for Demmycratic primary ballots.  You could hear the collective ‘BUT YOU’RE WHITE???” gasp.

Ballsy: That Clemson paw is EVERYWHERE!

Iowa State (+10) at Kansas State (8:00, Fox)

Who would have expected THIS to plausibly have Big 12 title implications?  But there you go.  Once you get past the very top layer of the sport, 2023 has been a great year FOAR chaos.

Ballsy: Green-eyed blondes for-EVA!

U*NC-Chapel Hole (-2.5) at NC State (8:00, ACCN)

Being favoUred would have scared me to death, and I prefer the insult of “unranked team playing away to the ranked team but favoUred somehow.”  We LIVE for such insults, especially when these rancid motherfuckers are involved.  I will try not to watch, and fail.  I NEED THIS.

Ballsy: No, what you need is THIS:

California (+9.5) at Westwood Klavern (10:30, ESPN)

Fatty McGoo saved his fatass jerb with an arse-kicking of the Troi Boiz last week.  They now have fuckshit to play for, while Cal’s Justin Wilcox maybe saves HIS OWN jerb with a win (and bowl qualification) here.  Disproprtional motivation is the key to predicting Nov/Dec JV NFL.  Hippo smells upset, though it’s probably just gas.

Ballsy: Yeah, it’s gas. I can smell it from here.