Hippo Micro-Thoughts

I mean, at least the Donks-land blizzard was pretty?

Total margin was 7, but clearly the two best teams moved on. So, congrats to the P*ts and SeaTruthers. But also? Go fuck yourselves.

We now return you to intermittent technical difficulties.

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King Hippo
Reclusive, vulgar Broncos fan. Also a proud fookin' Evertonian. Likely dropped on my head repeatedly as a small child. [Insert George Carlin quote followed by thoughtful nod.]
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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Dude …

Raiders are a really good team that can very well run away with the division next year. 

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They just need a better QB, better OG, better WRs, better CBs, better DTs, a head coach, and an offensive coordinator.

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Hey! Don’t forget better linebackers and safeties!

Last edited 1 month ago by Unsurprised
bk109

Soooo..
Shadeur Sanders is going to the Pro Bowl?!
I mean, I knew that’s a joke by this point.. but I didn’t realize that it was a joke told by Tigg Notaro, written by Hannah Gadsby and inspired by Bert Kreischer levels of “joke”

Redshirt

Comparing Joe Burrow & Shedeur Sanders Pro Bowl credentials just for fun

Aw, and we’re stuck with Joe Burrow as a quarterback with his accuracy, clutchness and arm strength.

NotShogunButShogun

Has everyone survived snowpacalypse now? We haven’t had a flake but it’s been subzero since Thursday.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We should be okay here in SoCal. It was pretty grim yesterday but the sun is mostly back out now and we should crack 70° soon.

LemonJello

Thoughts and prayers.

Redshirt

Have Snowblower – Will Travel – (Nextdoor Only)

Brick Meathook

The frozen tundra of Northern Virginia

Brought to you by Sunoco, The Official Fuel of NASCAR

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Senor Weaselo

Spoken in the best John Facenda impersonation, of course.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I missed the Broncos-Pats game, was it cromulent?

Gumbygirl

It was a snowball fight

2Pack

This is my truth.

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BeefReeferLives

So good to see Sam exorcise some of his playoff demons.

As long as he doesn’t celebrate by snogging with a bunch of randos, I think the Seahawks have a good shot.

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Gatoraids

should send players to a 1 year contract on the Jets as a last chance NFL Scared Straight program for disfunction

Horatio Cornblower

HBO is drawing up plans for this show as we speak.

BeefReeferLives

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blaxabbath

Come to think of it, why do NFL teams need to lock up players to long-term deals? The NFL would be much-improved if every season was a roster free-for-all the way NCAA is operating. Or, you know, about any other industry in America.

Also eliminate the salary cap because, with everyone now having a chance, many teams will want to cheat it.

I don’t know if it would lead to parity. But, “Team X won’t be anything for four more years because of Fired Guy’s desperate moves to keep his job,” doesn’t get me revved up to give a shit in 2030.

Gatoraids

is the joy of fantasy football for me, hate the few try hards that every year ask to turn it into a keeper league

Doktor Zymm

A spending floor would also be interesting, and dead cap should be eliminated. If a team fucks up and gives a whole bunch of money to a bust their ability to rebuild shouldn’t be handicapped

BugEyedBoo

NFL does have a salary floor. 95% of the salary cap, averaged over the past three years.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

If the NBA doesn’t properly punish the Clippers for circumventing the cap, you’ll probably see that happening there. Teams with money to spend under the table will be able to get whatever players they want.

Redshirt

Ah, the day after an AFC Championship loss barely snatched from the jaws of victory. Be brave, Hippo.

sad-dying
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I don’t know that the NFL would have tolerated the prospect of Jarrett Stidham facing that Seahawks defense in front of such a large audience that they want to hold captive. Nobody would have enjoyed the BEERGHKAAKE it would have taken to make that game even remotely competitive.

Redshirt

Its easy playing Captain Hindsight, but that 4th and 1 decision couldn’t have been worse. The decision to go for it (take the two-score lead with the backup QB and your defense playing lights out) and the play call itself (put the ball in your backup QB’s hands instead of just running the ball forward for one yard) will be dissected for the entire offseason.

The more you think about it, the worse it gets.

Senor Weaselo

The decision wasn’t great, but understandable at least (but yeah take the points).

The play call was atrocious.

Last edited 1 month ago by Senor Weaselo
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Didn’t Tom Hanks play Captain Hindsight in a movie or two?

ballsofsteelandfury

Franchises that have been reliably in the playoffs most years:
Patriots, Seahawks, Rams, Eagles, Buffalo, Baltimore, Pittsburgh, Kansas City, Dallas, 49ers, Green Bay

Franchises that seem to be stuck in the middle with almost annual rebuilds and only occasional playoffs:
Jacksonville, Miami, Tennessee, Indianapolis, Tampa Bay, Atlanta, New Orleans, Giants, Washington, Cincinnati, Detroit, Minnesota, Chicago, Denver, Houston, Carolina

Franchises that suck balls and will probably always suck balls:
Jets, Raiders, Browns, Cardinals, Chargers

Doktor Zymm

And 3 of those middling teams have never even been to a Super Bowl! (Jacksonville, Detroit, Houston)

BaldingSpiritually

Panthers moving up in the world!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

cougars led the way ppl forget that

Redshirt

Not to mention my team’s playoff run capability once they get there. Its like having an invasion ability of Spartan Army mixed with the D-Day divisions but the navy responsible to get them to the playoff is two paddle boats and a dingy.

ballsofsteelandfury

The two best teams did not move on. Payton blew it by not taking the points when the weather was good on a chip shot field goal.

The stupid maths don’t calc out in the playoffs. It’s a different beast. The few commentists that were able to get onto the site during the game pointed that out repeatedly.

Donks should have won.

Doktor Zymm

The maths require being able to estimate with pretty good precision how often you can make a 4th down as well as how much the difference in field position impacts the chances of the opponent scoring on the subsequent drive, and then calculating from there.
No one is actually doing the calculations during the game, and because people in general suck at probability they took the statement that teams don’t go for it often enough to mean they should go for it all the time. It’s just as incorrect as before but at least it’s more exciting.

ballsofsteelandfury

Until it makes Hippo take his final pill….

ballsofsteelandfury

You are correct, of course, but it pisses me off that they put up those graphics with the percentages. They are total lies and people take them as gospel.

Much like politics in this country….

Sharkbait

Knowing what the forecast was, they absolutely should have taken the points. Not that I’m complaining

Doktor Zymm

Even without the forecast they probably should have taken the points. New England’s defense was 2nd in the league at stopping 4th down during the regular season and the Broncos were only 10/20 on 4th which is the fewest attempts in the league and middle of the pack on percentage. Very rough, uninformed estimate, they make it 40% of the time. Then simplified calculation, if they assume they always get a TD after making the 4th and never miss the FG, 0.4*7 = 2.8 which is less than 3 so going for it is the lower expectation play.

/apologies to those who were told there would be no math

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I figured that was McVay’s philosophy when the Rams went for it late in the 4th. Their defense just couldn’t get the necessary stop in time.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Not to mention they are relying on a backup quarterback who had participated in zero of their earlier efforts.

Gumbygirl

That’s what killed them. If Nix had been able to play,we’d have a horsey birdie bowl in February.

Doktor Zymm

With 16 teams in each conference there are 256 possible Super Bowl matchups. This year is only the 60th Super Bowl ever and we’re getting a repeat. It will be the 11th Super Bowl rematch and the 5th in the last 10 years. Parity is a goddamn lie.

WCS

And birds. And Wyoming! And angry Yinzers who actually understand 9-1-1 cannot help with your snow removal. AND WYOMING!

blaxabbath

We are watching the Cardinals, again, start a ‘rebuild’ that is already a guaranteed failure. This franchise is as dead as the 4th Ammendment.

Agreed — the NFL only has about eight teams each season. The rest is filler.

bk109

Still better than most European footy. I mean, aside from the EPL, most leagues are 2 teams that always compete, a flash in the pan contender and the rest are “most honoured punching bags”.. so 8 teams being competitive outta 30 teams + Jets and Browns isn’t as bad as you’d think..

Doktor Zymm

They don’t brag about their parity at least, but still must be annoying for everyone except fans of the perennial teams

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Which is why we all want relegation!

Doktor Zymm

Of the 4 possible matchups that could have come out of the conference round I think only RAMMIT/Donks would be a new matchup.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I would not have been mad at a Super Bowl XX rematch, but Ben Johnson also did not take the points in the playoffs.

Doktor Zymm

That’s also long enough ago that most of the viewing audience either didn’t watch the game or don’t remember it so it feels less rematchy