Monday Morning Mock Draft: Posted!

Guten tag, drones.

“Posted!” is something we tend to say in my monthly poker tournament.  The previous blind is coming to a quick end, the next (and higher) blind is about to come in, so you throw the older blind out and yell “posted!” before the alarm sounds and you’re good.

This has nothing to do with today’s topic, but it did add 50 words to the count.

This week we’re drafting movie posters.  I defy you to fuck up the rules on this one:

  1.  Is it a movie?
  2. Is there a movie for the poster?
  3. Then it’s eligible to be drafted!
  4. If whatever it is you’re drafting doesn’t meet 1 & 2 then it is not eligible, and may God have mercy on your soul if you draft it anyway, as I will not.
  5. I don’t actually care that much.  It’s Monday for Christ’s sake.

*Commentariat drafts nothing but Farrah Fawcett posters.

**Who could cast a stone?

This was a recent topic that came to mind, inspired when I saw the poster for my first pick.  To my mind it’s the clear #1, but reasonable minds can differ.

They’ll be wrong, but they can differ.

There’s really not a lot to say about this topic, so I’ll just get to the pick.

As I said, there can be only one.  I have never seen a poster that both tells you all you need to know about the movie, makes you want to see the movie, and also is a solid piece of art in its own right.

Ain’t no one beating that, but someone’s gotta come in second.  Which means that the rest of you are on the clock.

(I very much miss HRTN and wish it would come back.  Sorry if any of you got excited by the featured image, but I couldn’t find the poster Beastmode had at one point)

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101 Comments
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

UDFA, or maybe just as a team mascot or something.

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

7. Fargo. There are many much greater fans of the film than me, but I just really love the originality of this design:

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BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

does it still count if the movie has yet to be released.
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Stolen from the comments post ( spoiler).
Space Balls 2 for the CTRL+F

Sharkbait

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Brick Meathook

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

6. The Legend of Billie Jean. This may seem like a silly pick, and I don’t think I ever saw the actual movie, but there was a time in my life when I would routinely get hypnotized by this poster while browsing through Blockbuster Video so in honor of teenage Rikki I am obligated to make this choice.

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Last edited 15 hours ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Brick Meathook

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Bogdanski

Another Jimmy Stewart film:
https://www.kingandmcgaw.com/prints/saul-bass/anatomy-of-a-murder-439654#439654::air:25_frame:880229_glass:770007_media:1_mount:108649_mount-width:0_size:437,620
Saul Bass

Bogdanski

goddammit

Gatoraids

Carrie

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Last edited 15 hours ago by Gatoraids
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

We interviewed her. Crossed her off for character concerns.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

As is often the case, the original:

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Is massively improved upon by the Italians:

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

/spits on ground
//apologizes to Lowratio, hadn’t seen him down there

Don T

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Brick Meathook

I’d watch the hell out of this.

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