A full #content day here at [DFO]’s undersea headquarters, thanks to that malaka Dean Spanos and the ingenuity & wit of the various award-snubbed authors we have on staff.

NFL News:

• Fearing they’d miss out on all that guaranteed Raider-fan money, the Chargers announced they are moving to LA to be Stan Kroenke’s tenant.
  • they will play the next two years in Carson, CA at the StubHub Center.
    • a soccer stadium
  • then they’ll move into Stan’s Compendium of Exterior Crip Tags
    • annual rent = $1/year.
    • relocation fee = $650 million
  • Roger Goodell said the Spanos’ tried real hard to keep the team in San Diego. “For more than a decade,” apparently.
    • requisite hashtags applied below.

5:00 West Coast time update: Anthony Lynn to become new Chargers head coach.

• Some guy got angry enough to chuck eggs at the front office. Not angry enough to try, however.

Angry @Chargers fan eggs building after hearing owner Dean Spanos may announce team's move to LA this morning. Stay w #NBC7 pic.twitter.com/oHQqqIWuPp

— Liberty Zabala DC News Now (@Liberty_Zabala) January 12, 2017

• In a surefire attempt to steal the Chargers’ thunder, the Rams have decided on Sean McVay as RAM IT! #1 for 2017.
  • He was previously the [Redacteds] offensive coordinator. So Jared Goff is getting the Kirk Cousins treatment? That’ll work.
  • He’s only 30?! Fuck my life!

• No word yet on Jordy Nelson, but c’mon.
  • No update either on whether Leon Hall has gotten a letter from the League office about said hit.

• Joey Porter has had all but two charges dropped from his indictment.
  • He now just faces summary disorderly conduct and summary public drunkenness.
    • Each carry fines up to $500 and 90 days in jail.

• Speaking of dropped charges, Ray Lewis offered some “legacy advice” to Odell Beckham.
  • no word on if “Deny, deny, deny” was part of the conversation.

Finally, “The Ringer” given us Bill Simmons hyper-overanalyzing the “Inches” speech from “Any Given Sunday”. Rather than subject you to reading it, or myself to analyzing it, I’mma just post the movie clip here for all of us to enjoy again.

https://youtu.be/_b7bgtu2O4E

At least there’s no mention of the Patriots. That’s probably on his stupid podcast.

Hey, speaking of podcasts, there’s going to be a new Free Ballin’ Football for you to download & enjoy on Friday. They have delayed its release 24 hours in respect of Chargers’ fans loss. It’ll be there for you tomorrow morning at 11:00 [DFO] time.

Canada 150:

Your Canada 150 factoids for today, January 12:

• 1945 – Japanese “balloon bombs” landed in Saskatchewan.
  • they were carried further than their intended West Coast target by the jet stream.
    • Only 300 were ever reported to have landed in Canada. Most landed in Oregon or southern Washington.
  • None of them worked, because their mechanisms froze due to altitude and Canada.
• 1995 – Neil Young is inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame.

Tonight’s sports:

• NHL Hockey:
  • Canadiens at Wild – 8:00PM | NBCSP
  • Bruins at Predators – 8:00PM | Sportsnet
  • Blues at Kings – 10:30 – Sportsnet
• NBA Basketball:
  • Bulls at Knicks – 8:00PM | TNT / Sportsnet1
  • Pistons at Warriors – 10:30PM | TNT
• NCAA:
  • all over ESPN at 7:00 & 9:00
  • Washington at California – 9:00PM | FS1

LET YOUR SPANOS HATE FLOW!