Week 15, Broadcast Maps

Week 15 is here.  Let’s go to the broadcast map:  Week 15, Broadcast Maps

Primetime Games are as follow:

TNF: Bucs @ Rams

SatNF: Jets @ Cowboys

SNF: Cards @ Eagles

MNF: Lions @ Saints

Jeff Fisher is doing his trademark mediocrity once again this year, while the Bucs have been a surprise this year.  Asshole Cam Newton may be a viable QB in this league after all.   Can’t wait for “FUCK HER RIGHT IN HER PUSSY” to be Tampa Bay’s fans rallying call when Winston throws a TD pass.  Jets are playing a Dallas team that has more or less quit for the year.  It’s an important game for the Jets considering the tight AFC wild card race.   Cards are featured in consecutive prime-time games, you know it is as though they are a good team.  Eagles have been massively inconsistent this year, but are still vying for the right to get murder-death-killed by the Seahawks or reasonably trounced by the Vikings. Lions and Saints are just trying to close out the season.

We must have done something right since there is a 7:5 early/late afternoon ratio of games.  Of course, there it took 14 weeks for this to occur.

CBS early features the triumphant return of the Minnesota Middle Finger.  Titans-Patriots are in more the country than they should be considering how bad the Titans are.  Expect a molly-whopping for that one.   The Battle for the # 4 seed in the AFC is featured in all of Texas (looks like those Dallas bastards finally relented), Seattle, Indy’s sphere of influence and Cleveland.  It is fitting such a sad spectacle is featured in the US’s saddest sports city.  Chiefs-Ravens is featured in a huge swarth of the West and Midwest, plus a small part of the Mid-Atlantic.  Andy will probably spend the entire game contemplating how many variants of crab his is going to eat after the game, yet the Chiefs will win another low-scoring affair regardless.

CBS Late has the marquee game with Broncos-Steelers in the vast amount of the country.  Bengals-49ers is limited to their core markets.  Are the Chargers-Dolphins even on…are you sure…wait I see it.  Congratulations on winning the “No One Wants to Fucking Watch This Game” Award.

Fox early has Panthers-Giants in a long portion of the country.  Come witness Odell Beckham score on majestic explosive plays while the Giants lose by 17 (or better yet where the Giants snatch defeat from the jaws of victory).  Bears-Vikings is in most of the Northern Midwest.  Bills-Redskins is limited to their core markets.  Falcons-Jags is limited to a small segment of the south.  Atlanta’s collapse went rather unnoticed I suppose.

Fox late has two games. Browns-Seahawks is a game I do not want to watch.  Seattle has to put up at least 50 on the Browns, right?  Packers-Raiders wins the FEMA quarantine game of the week award.  This might be worth a watch as the Packers have been a bit wobbly and the Raiders actually look like they may no longer be a clusterfuck of an organization.