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Saturday Evening Post Open Thread … or Something

Brocky

/

Hey all, how has your Saturday been so far?

 

 

Mine was great. I sat around watching football. Saw my alma mater lose another bowl game that they were projected to win, but hey, that’s my life for ya.

 

 

 

I have no idea what to write here. I’ve tried my hand with creative writing, but can seem to consistently come up with ideas…. so here goes nothing……

 

 

 

There once was a lad names Brocky

 

 

Who’s life path was considered quite rocky

But after a while…

He said with a smile…

 

 

 

Nothing because because he got hit by a bus because god hates me.

 

 

Seriously, my fantasy team lost this week, college team lost this week, and my pro team will probably lose tomorrow.

 

 

Hasaturdayve fun and be merry. at least you aren’t me.

 

 

As for college football,  #5 Texas A&M vs #13 North Carolina. I don’t care for either program, but I hate NC’s basketball program,  so go Aggies!

 

 

 

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Hickory dickory dock-y
What’s up with this dude named Brocky?
He thinks himself lame
Which is a big ass shame
Because that is a total crock-y

5
Gumbygirl

My power went off for no fucking reason, I ran out of firewood last night, and I’m not getting more delivered until Monday. Shit.

2
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Have you considered burning books? No? Good.

2
Dunstan

They say alcohol doesn’t actually keep you warm, but who ya gonna believe, science or your impaired brain?

4
Mr. Ayo

Time to dust off the blankets and Gumby, and get cozy.

2
Bloody Lethal

And the cover happened all is well.

1
Dolph Ucker

He said with a smile,
I know more than Bettman ’bout hockey.

My girlfriend describes me as “cocky.”

I’m hung like a horse, not a jockey.

At least I’ve been to Lake Winnepasaukie.

Etc.

6
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

But my pantry is loaded with Pocky!
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2
King Hippo

Eat all the shit, Mack Brown!

/also kudos to the ACC for the 0-fer

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Tonight’s dinner was salmon with the standard issue soy-ginger-honey sauce and blood orange pisco sours. Followed by chocolate chip cookies. 2021 is off to a good start.

5
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Sounds awesome. Leftover pork supplemented with newly cooked onions, peppers, mushrooms and green beans here. And i took some apple cider syrup lady bfc made and created a cocktail with that, bourbon, apple brandy, benedictine, and cardamom bitters.

3
Dunstan

Did a 24-hour sous vide cook of half a turkey breast. Requires some advance planning but can’t argue with the results. Some roasted brussel sprouts and brown rice.

2
Gumbygirl

We had seafood fried rice(sqid rings, shrimp, scallops) with a fried runny egg on top. Still have a couple of pieces of cheesecake singing to me from the kitchen.

2
Gumbygirl

He said with a smile
At least my penis is stocky!

5
Brocky

shit that’s good

2
Gumbygirl

I’m glad you liked it. Hope you feel better soon, it’s been a rough fucking year. Better days are coming.

1
Mr. Ayo

Do not attempt to jump a buggy into a crater on the moon? Got it Allstate. I’ll make sure to avoid doing that.

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5
Bloody Lethal

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g1i8dnAi3X4

0
Dunstan

12 Warner Brothers employees on the Young Sheldon set have contracted COVID. When asked for comment, a spokesperson said “that’s actually a pretty good week for this show — usually we make millions of Americans want to puke.”

3
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

More like Young Shel-DONE, amirite?

1
Brocky

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5
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I didn’t even need the followup joke; the original image was funny enough to me.

2
Brocky

i just love the absurd idea that evangelicals are dumb enough to think aborted children get the courtesy of a gravesite

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

What do miscarriages get? A little plaque or something?

1
Mr. Ayo

A pin that reads “Pregnancy Participant”

7
Dunstan

It’s weird how pro-lifers aren’t lobbying intensely for government funding, or raising private charitable funds, for a massive program of research into how to prevent miscarriages.

Ha ha no, it’s not weird at all.

1
Brocky

the fact that immediately thought of making jokes about multiple members of my immediate family really shows how fucked up i i am

1
Bloody Lethal

Who was guarding the bathwater?!

7
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

@Brocky – that limerick was actually really good.

3
Brocky

i love the idea of anti joke in the form if a rhyme scheme.

i was watching an old episode of who’s line, they were doing a hoe down, and they were singing about some sort of impact trauma. the comic was singing in a innuendos but instead of the expected rhyme of “fuck” they said rhyme, throwing the whole thing off. I’ve always remembered it.

years later, my go to birthday greeting is some sort of variation on:

?Happy Birthday to you?

?I’m missing a shoe?

?I really suck at rhyming?

?Potato?

1
Brocky

god damn that red border looks good

2
Dunstan

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sKVCCcnHFw8

0
herodotus450

why were there NFL games last saturday (and the one before that?) but not today, the day of my daughters wedding?

4
LemonJello

Mazeltov!

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3
Fronkenshteen

Re: 1/6/2021

Proud boys will be rat packed. Do they honestly think they’re invisible? Or like ants; able to transmit a sonic signal to all bite at once? They are full of Red Bull and beef jerky farts. We will slaughter them in the streets.

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

January 6th is not the day to confront them.

0
Brocky

when you find out HBOMax has batman the animated series

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1
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Howdy. Can we just not go back to work Monday and skip right to utopia?

0
SonOfSpam

Helluva catch by the T*r He*l.

0
litre_cola

Gamblor has forsaken me this evening. Good morning, but cap it off with a loss in the evening. Tomorrow is another day to worship although with the Rona and people being rested will be a tricky affair.

0
ballsofsteelandfury

I’m watching They Live on peacock and it’s such a fucking good movie! Perfect for 2021.

1
LemonJello

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1
litre_cola

1st open thread at gun point for Brocky! Huzzah!

The Buenos Aires derby is right now and it is ultra strange with no crowd there climbing the fences. So strange.

4
litre_cola

Red card for a clothesline??? Well I never.

2
Fronkenshteen

How does one do an open thread? Do you have to sit and moderate comments? Do you need special equipment?

1
SonOfSpam

Remove pants.

Type something while engorged.

Finish. (Both things)

1
Brocky

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HVvXWUAKtus

1
litre_cola

Nope. Just imbibe whatever you fancy. Say some words and wait for the commentists to show up!

1
Fronkenshteen

Am inspired.

1
Senor Weaselo

Has there been violence?

0
litre_cola

It is a very rough game. No fans, no violencia.

1
Brocky

too little

1
LemonJello

This advice is also relevant to prison.

2
LemonJello

THIS ORANGE BOWL, I CALL THE LIBRARY BECAUSE THESE U*NC PLAYERS DON’T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK THEY’RE SUPPOSED TO DO HERE.

6
Brocky

Hasaturdayve fun and be merry. at least you aren’t me.

and I reviewed twice, edited twice, and its still a typo.

2
ballsofsteelandfury

It adds to the charm!

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