Your Week 2 Early Slate of Games Open Thread

Ten mother-lovin’ games? Better get to work…

Car @ Hou: The Hoyer Era lasted a wee bit shorter than the length of one football game. Congrats coaching staff, no matter who you play at QB going forward you’ll have to answer a boatload of questions about the guy you didn’t start. Kuechly’ (no matter how you spell it, it looks wrong) is out today but the Panther D shouldn’t have much of a problem against the Texans. Where’s Greg Olsen? Nowhere to be found last week. He had only two targets.

SF @ Pit: Hyde went bananas last week and Bush is out (surprise!) so look for more of the same. If Kap spies a gap he should be off and running-the Steelers secondary is iffy. TE Davis may be able to take advantage of the same situation. Brown has a minimum 5 catches and 50 yards for an NFL record 33 consecutive games-the second longest active streak is 4. I thought Wheaton would take advantage of Bryant not being around. That has not been the case.

TB @ NO: Both teams are 0-1 but this division battle will have no ramifications in the future. Winston looked overwhelmed last week just as he did in the preseason. Evans should be ready to go-adjust your lineups accordingly. How ’bout that disconnect between lousy QB play and points expected to be garnered by a quality WR in fantasy? Brees threw 48 times last week. The Wolf Man bulldozed the Saints to 31st in the league in total defense last year. I wonder what he’s got up his sleeve this time around. Colston has had a great run but it looks as though his knees have gone the way of the fax machine.

Det @ Min: As we learned last week, Stafford has been in the league X number of years and still gets rattled by blitz packages. The Lions D is goig to fall from a top 5 unit to somewhere in the middle of the pack.As yeah right said, “give AP the damn ball!” That should solve a number of problems for the offence in general and Bridgewater in particular. Maybe the coaching staff had him on a “carry count”? Otherwise, it doesn’t make sense.

Ari @ Chi: Ellington is out so Johnson (Chris) and Johnson (David) will clean up the running game. I think Andre will come back to a muddled RBBC situation. Palmer picked up where he left off last season. A Warner-like renaissance for him? I’d like to see it. It’s imperative that Allen get pressure on Palmer early. Jeffrey’s hamstring is acting up-if he’s out Patrick Peterson is going to take the next WR out of the game so that leaves Bennett at TE as the only viable threat in the passing game. I don’t like the Bears chances.

NE @ Buff: Rex said that everyone wants them to beat the Pats and he is right. Gronk has scored 9 TD’s in 7 games against the Bills but is generally limited against Ryan defenses. McCoy is questionable so we may see a whole lot of Boobie. Buffalo looked amazing last week and in the preseason as well. Brady doesn’t do well against pressure and this Bills D can deliver on that front.

SD @ CIN: The Chargers D held Megatron to 2 catches-can they do the same to Green? Allen, Green, Floyd, Gordon, Woodhead, Oliver and Gates later on-Rivers has a ton of toys to play with this year. Cincy has no injured players! It doesn’t matter. It is very important for Hill to chew up the clock so that Rivers doesn’t get on the field.

Ten @ Cle: The huge story this week is that Terrance West returns to Cleveland to wreak mediocrity and take a seat on the bench. Mariota, huh? What happened last week? McCown is out and Bowe is questionable, which in this business is known as addition by subtraction.

Atl @ NYG: Ryan shouldn’t have any problems unless he’s terrified by invisible pass rushes. Tevin Coleman looks to be the guy in the Falcons backfield. Say a prayer for the Giants secondary-Julio Jones is in town. Vic Beasley against Ereck Flowers-who ya got? There is a 50-50 chance that the Giants could be 0-3 five days from now. (they meet Wash. on Thursday)

StL @ Was: St. Lou ambushed Seattle last week and should take their opponent out behind the woodshed this week. My buddy Cunningham didn’t embarrass himself last week. The jury is still out on Foles though he didn’t throw a pic last week. Rashad Ross scored 4 TD’s in preseason and is looking for his first in real play. He replaces D-Jax this week.

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Sharkbait

Bills gon’ Bills

King Hippo

Mathematically, Pats definitely shoulda gone for it.

Sill Bimmons

Billsderpically, it was the right call.

nomonkeyfun

Don’t worry the Bills will score a touchdown, then go for the PAT with time expiring.

Oh, I’m sorry Tom and Elisha don’t work for the Bills, never mind then.

Sill Bimmons

See?

Sill Bimmons

ALL THE REFEREE HERP

Sharkbait

The Buffalo train horn is giving me PTSD from the 2014 Stanley Cup Final
/Sorry for bringing up hockey

//Sorry not sorry

MikeWallaceAndGromit

Ryan Mallet is historically bad.

King Hippo

It’s like he went to Elisha time management school.

Sill Bimmons

Ryan Mallett: Not The Guy

Bortleback

When will the Favre to Texans rumours start?

Sill Bimmons

Fucking Amendola.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
nomonkeyfun

Penile Colony, (voice goes up three octaves) oooooh, (back down 5) oh never mind.

-Rodgers

Bortleback

Steve Smith punched that ball away like it was a baby

Sharkbait

Please to be not derping this away Patriots

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Please derp it away Patriots.

Sill Bimmons

DERPS AWAY

Sill Bimmons

THEY REMEMBERED THEY HAVE SAMMY WATKINS WOO

Sill Bimmons

COME ON BILLS

King Hippo

quite the surprising development

Come on Bills

Bortleback

Ryan Mallet with a pass to the receiver’s ankles

Bortleback

So even if the saints score here they’ll probably miss the extra point, right?

blaxabbath

Winton rape joke.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
JustStopDude

What the fuck is up with this epic Fox music?!?!

Sill Bimmons

Not with a bang, but a derp.

blaxabbath

Palmer to fake taking a knee and hit Brown down the sideline….

ThePirateSloth

The Bucs are still Bucs-ening.

JustStopDude

https://i.chzbgr.com/full/7702218240/hBEC3A535/

Seriously…how the fuck had the Saints losing to the Bucs today…be honest.

Sill Bimmons

BREESUS INTO SEPTUPLE COVERAGE

King Hippo

hey, if the Raiders come through my Survivor pool just takes a ginormous mulligan.

JustStopDude
IronAvenger6491

It’s official, the Giants are retarded.

Duchess

Well how many people are getting knocked out of the Suicide Pick’em league with the Tampa Bay and Washington scores today?

Sill Bimmons

Already out. Thanks C-Hox!

Sharkbait

Yo. Thou has forsaken me Bressus!

blaxabbath

I just set my guesses before the season and forget about them.

nomonkeyfun

But at least I had the Bucs to beat the spread, but not the Stillers.

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