“Late in the evening the American Football Fan, awash in a sea of carbohydrates and intoxicants, settles down for the evening. Its energy is spent and the couch sings its siren song-few can resist. Those that have already found their way back to their lair begin to go over-in what could be called their minds-the things they’ll type on blog sites or shout into phones during call-in shows the following day.”
Dal @ NO: Good news for the Cowboys-Ingram is not Devonta Freeman and Spiller isn’t anyone at this point. Dallas should be able to put Taylor Swift behind this O-Line and get 75 yards out of her. The only concern would be the song she inevitably comes out with detailing the lack of support Weeden gave her and that she has to move on now. Can you see the despair in Brees’ eyes as he surveys the diseased deathscape that is the Saints roster? The one that reminds him of New Orleans post-Katrina?
I get the feeling that if I were to go to New Orleans is that I’d hate Bourbon Street but find a ton of other stuff I’d love.
Just got an angry call from a customer. Seems they bought a motor and our sales people allowed them to waiver the cost of having a field engineer present for the installation and commissioning of the motor. They blew the motor up.
Somehow I am suppose to fix this remotely.
I call my boss up wanting to know why a) we sold a motor and did not install it ourselves and b) why the fuck do these people have my number.
I get told to talk to him in the morning. Meanwhile my phone keeps going off.
Anyone want to hire a mechanical/electrical engineer?
This is what happens when you give stupid people who don’t know they’re stupid money to buy things.
Its fucking dumbfounding. Having an engineer there would cost maybe 20k. But keep in mind, this is a 15000hp motor. So we are talking easily $1.2 million just for the fucking thing to get to the location.
Tell them to turn in off and on. Then refer it to your manager.
They did. And they had the rotor pulled forward about an inch. So when they energize the motor, the rotor pulled the gear box an inch.
Basically the gear box exploded. Most likely there is significant damage to the motor itself because it sounds like this did this without the oil system in the motor running. So all the bears wiped.
In the customer’s defense, I am certain we just sent them the Japanese manuals.
Stop throwing to Williams.
That was so very Weeden of Weeden.
And theres the Doopy Pantz we all know and love.
That’s proper Doopy
I have the hiccups like a common drunk. I know a cure, but I have had too much to drink to apply it. and now boooooooooooooooo COWBOYS!
try going through the motions of taking a bong hit. hold the imaginary smoke a LOOOONNNNNGGGG time. should work
WEEDEN THREW THAT?!
Seriously
BRYCE BUTLER!!!! WOO-HOO BRYCE BUTLER!!!!
/surreptitiously looks at program
//nudges guy next to him
Pssst! Who the fuck is Bryce Butler?
The Doopman cometh, the Doopman fucking cometh.
Doopybomb!
I’ve learned that my main tennis failing is not being loose enough. Is this the end of sober tennis?
That’s enough slut-shaming out of you young lady.
You play sports sober?
My first serve sucks, which is particularly vexing for a relatively tall person.
Also, being old.
Such a shame that this fine display of footy can only go to one overtime period, maximum.
Why is Hugh Jackman playing Adrian Brody?
Good lord the Wolfman’s cub looks like he should be on a list somewhere.
TAKE THAT, FIELD GOAL GODS!
BTW, I love you field goal gods, for your hate of Mr. Sturgis.
A nice commercial to remind you that nobody has ever loved you, and nobody ever will.
I’m out of ice cubes.
NO LOVE!!!!
I wonder when Payton is going to unleash Magnum on us. I hear good things about that look.
Someone in the NBC production van is really proud of that choice of bumper music.
Dallas first half:
http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/df/ff/df/dfffdfb7100910210bbd9c717d5de45c.jpg
Dallas second half:
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view3/20140104/4943532/platoon-sgt-elias-o.gif
On a positive note, Claiborne has improved a fuckton this season
FLAGS FOR THE FLAG GOD
This game has officially entered pillow fight territory.
Dear Saints, HOW CAN YOU NOT DO WELL ON OFFENSE?q!
Gotta make the pizzas…can’t handle much more blood-letting. Guess it’s time to bring in the JV!
Will the cart have no mercy!
http://cdn0.sbnation.com/imported_assets/1011127/whatthefuck4c0b9_medium.gif
I don’t cheer for injuries, but the idea of Dallas being Weeden and a handful of practice squad dudes is prertty awesome.
2015 Cowboys fandom:
http://i.ytimg.com/vi/C-zCzM5qPec/maxresdefault.jpg
Okay, I know I’m supposed to hate commercials because I’m a cynical motherfucker, but I liked the Marshawn Pepsi commercial.
To be fair listening to the Zac Brown Band usually puts me into a murderous rage too.
Is that who that was?
I believe so.
I don’t think any of these Southwest Air employees have ever heard music before.
Music didn’t make it past budget cuts
New Game: guess how Jerry Jones offended the football gods to cause them to punish the Cowboys with injuries and Doopy Pantz.
He bought a football team.
Specifically, the one in Dallas.
I’m just thinking his pact with Satan had a few…unfriendly clauses.
That looked very painful.
If things get to the point that you can detect with a self exam, you’re basically fucked.
Lance Dumb-Bar, Amirite?
“That was about 10″ that saved him”
But enough about my wedding night!
Heyooooo!
Halftime Show!
They sound kinda like The Start.
What the fuck is wrong with his eyes?
He’s still have those Sochi redeyes?
-The [*Redacted] s defense looking across the line at Sam Bradford
How the fuck yo doin boys?
/ Looks around, sees Zymm, prays Blonde ain’t around to kill monkey.
And ladies.
Cheers hon, all is well.
I love you Frau Doktor. Not in that way, well I haven’t met you in person, but you could send to the future or past. I don’t know what is going on with that story.
That NASCAR updates reminds me that Tony Stewart killed a guy with his car.
Just like Caitlyn Jenner
Must be tough for Suh to be 100% responsible for Miami sucking.
Get fucking rekt Suh.
Our local break was our weather guy saying “Finally it will be warming up…”
Dude it’s October. It’s supposed to get colder.
Am I the only person that fucking now dreads pregame, halftime, and post game segments?
Just dread everything. Makes life much simpler and less of a letdown.
I’m going with watching OutKast videos until the second half starts…
MANY DISFORTUNES TO THE DALLAS SQUAD OF FOOTBALLERS!
http://media.giphy.com/media/OEAT1BiZeI0JW/giphy.gif
One of these days I’m gonna be detained by some sort of unorthodox FBI unit, and I’m gonna be really sad I haven’t watched any of those network shows involving cops.
Well just remember that can’t convict you without adequate semen samples.
Blacklist is enjoyable solely when James Spader plays the charming, murderous sociopath.
Blindspot: ANOTHER EXCUSE FOR US TO GIVE A CHICK A GUN AND HAVE GUYS STARE INTO THE CAMERA WITH SERIOUS LOOKS ON THEIR FACES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And we’re showing her almost naked because her tattoos are relevant to the plot!
Tomorrow: Sexy Bourne Identity, because we’re now recycling movies into shows.
Al can’t wait to go to Bourbon Street.
Every night is a trip to bourbon street for Al
All the Ingram screens please.