Apologies for the brevity and the lack of scotchy-level humour and insight…
Rams at Bucs (4:05, Fox)
Rapey Jameis and palz host the team that cannot offense. RedZone will surely show at least 5 plays from this thriller.
49ers at Seahawks (4:05, Fox)
So far, the SeaTruthers have looked awful shitty. That hypothesis will be put to the test in this one. First team to 10 wins. You can see why Fox is happy not to have double header coverage this fuckin’ week. Jeebus.
Jets at Chiefs (4:25, CBS)
One always wonders how the Jets will manage to Jets this one up, especially given the Chefs penchant for pulling undeserved wins out of their collective butthole. As far as I can tell, every Gang Green WR is injured, presumably with consumption.
Chargers at Colts (4:25, CBS)
BOLTMAN! is no doubt well-pleased with the early season competence, and viewers will no doubt be entertained by this defense-free matchup. Barn-raiser extraordinaire Andy Luck has to be feeling older than King Laserface of late, playing behind his tissue paper OL.
Steelers at Eagles (4:25, CBS)
Here’s the broadcast game pretty much everybody gon’ get. Which will mostly be DeAngelo and Antonio Brown carving the Iggle D a new asshole or seven, while Jeeeem and Pheeeel splooge all over each other about Carson Wentz’ poise. You’ll be very thankful for RedZone Channel, like you should always be.
I have far too many Jeremy’s on my fantasy teams
Fitz must be colorblind today.
QB Taunting Penalty? Wow, BLEERGH is tough but fair.
So, Kaep not getting any playing time is THE story of this week by the media in the NFL, or 2nd biggest story the media will talk about this week?
Brett Favre’s college girlfriend Rachel wasn’t prepared for the picture Brett would send back.
http://blogfiles.wfmu.org/KF/2016/09/21/burrito_TOO_BIG.gif
Is that a taco, or…?
The Taquito Of Our Lord
Now THAT’S a gawd I can believe in!
My Lethal Weapon and Kids
I was going to save this for the end of the game, but it won’t get better.
http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/epicrapbattlesofhistory/images/9/94/Well_that_was_fucking_dreadful.gif
Greatest. TV Series. Ever.
Their first movie was pretty rad too.
You know what bugs the shit out of me about the Walking Dead? The zombies would be the least dangerous thing.
Former pets and escaped zoo animals would be taking survivors out left and right. Then you got lockjaw, rabies, blood poisoning, the common cold.
Hell, unattended nuclear facility meltdowns alone would pretty much wipe out the East Coast and PNW.
Is that true? My understanding is that nuclear reactors are configured such that being left unattended leads to shutdown, not meltdown.
Pretty much. They are designed for the rods to fully insert automatically (Scram), and the system should have natural flow through heat immersion.
Even if that doesn’t happen, at least US built ones, are designed with containment.
You’re assuming the NRC really justifies their paychecks through careful planning & surveying of the plants, and not just green-lighting everything they’re told to. Trust me, there’s far more of the latter than the former.
Best case maybe, but with the nuclear materials left unattended, a shutdown would be an eventual meltdown in any event. And if there’s other waste around, it’s a hazard as well.
The PNW for example, would be an issue due to millions of gallons of waste being left unattended. Some of that waste needs to be monitored & stirred constantly.
Also, containment vessels breaking down, water levels changing, hazard-recognition systems failing…yeah, they’d melt down.
I don’t think Ben’s been this frustrated since the stall door was locked.
http://www.quickmeme.com/img/ff/ffa1e089b8328988dde39800fc003bca6a6d488d32e64900b2f7791d70b967e4.jpg
Something off about this Seahawks defense in the 4th. I have no stats to back this claim, but, I swear they get worse in the 4th. They’ve been like this for 2-3 years now.
That’s the time when Wilson generally wakes up and starts playing football though, so it might not always be obvious
2nd & 40? 2nd & 40.
Hines Ward was IMBA in that game
What the XFL should have been.
The mostly outdoor cat who hates everyone by my daughter, and has only a grudging acceptance of her, has showed up at the house meowing at us and limping badly. I followed her until she disappeared under the bushes, where I found a chipmunk tail and head. I think she may be showing off, but if so that chipmunk went out like a Viking. Valhalla you stripey motherfucker.
Was it Chip or Dale?
Hopefully both.
Alvin: WITNESS ME!
Simon: MEDIOCRE!
Theodore: /is already dead
From your lips to God’s ears.
San Diego BLEERGHS
PRAISE THE SUN COLORED LAUNDRY
Son of Zorn looks horrible
Not if you never watch it.
Aw, our local news is so adorably optimistic that we’ll be “thrashing” the Jags in London.
That’s why you need one of these:
http://nationalave.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/Screen-Shot-2014-10-13-at-12.26.16-AM.png
Jiminy cricket
Fuck I just realized I had wentz on my bench…
/sad trombone
TipFitzception!
Put Tiny Darren back in!
–Sproles’s wife, probably
Colts vs Bolts, at least it’s a game.
Finally!
Cbs mercy-ruling Pitt/Eagles. Bolt/Clots!
I’m stuck with it. 🙁
http://m.memegen.com/lxowa3.jpg
http://www.mememaker.net/static/images/memes/4466598.jpg
Garbagedown Niners
Am all for celebrating the Steelers getting absolutely worked but Fuck Philly.
http://assets.sbnation.com/assets/1797579/LeaglesL.gif
Whenever I am about to make a Jameis joke my iPod always seems to shuffle to Rapeman.
You mean Dayman………..
http://67.media.tumblr.com/8f76a06c8c7810aec7cddf2cc34c0afb/tumblr_o4d06dgBaQ1vokxzpo1_500.gif
http://img.memecdn.com/conspiracy-keanu_o_629106.jpg
Bleergh will indeed be pleased after today.
Sill right now.
http://i4.ytimg.com/vi/kcsemGUl0xM/hqdefault.jpg
I really fucking wish, just cause the Philly game is on here, that I lived within driving distance of a Wawa.
They call vomiting distance.
I think it’s Metric
Dude…all I got around me are Sheetz.
Great if you want to get a terrible burger, some menthols, and some crank from a barefooted pregnant woman next to the dumpster.
http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/facebook/000/205/483/then-who-was-phone.jpg
I don’t understand penalties sometimes. That was DPI and not OPI? FLAGS FOR THE FLAG GOD!
34-3 in a non Pennsylvania market should be enough for CBS to switch to the Colts-Bolts game. Fuck you, NFL.
This!
http://49.media.tumblr.com/4bfaa4d79ff4bc667e0657b1ebcb0a0a/tumblr_mjxhg8OFUc1ronhn5o1_400.gif
http://www.memerush.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/conspiracykeanu-cantsleepirl.jpg
I’m not sure I’m ready to live in a world where Doug Baldwin is considered a high end receiver.
Its only Chip Kelly’s defense
Once there is enough tape on Wentz the other D Coordinators can really plan for him. Then we’ll really see what he’s got.
Remember Sam Bradfords first few games.
Off topic, but how many of you have used Uber? I need to get out of this hotel but no way am I driving. I already have the app.
Use it all the time. Beats the hell out of taxis.
Are you 76 years old? Uber is great, as long as you can hold your nose on their labor practices and general douchebaggery.
My home city banned it due to their lack of security measures.
You misspelled “because the taxi companies own city government.”
I use it for travel and planned drinking nights. Es bueno.
Depending on the city Uber is great. I use it fairly often in Seattle. But we are one of those cities
That’s some quality tackling….
Game, blouses!
http://i.imgur.com/QS3J2Ed.gif
Who are these people, and why aren’t they pitching it to Sproles?
One more score, and it’ll be safe to go make dinner
Not Goredown!
C’mon. Bring on, Kap. Time for him to face the music!
The day would be close to a complete success apart from picking Arizona in the suicide league.
Week 3 strikes again goddammit.
Btw, Roberto Aguayo missed another field goal today, so that second round pick continues to get funnier.
Brady-esque!
http://i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/245/401/dc2.jpg