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Kudos to all you folks that have stuck it out through “The Troubles”. Your patience will be rewarded with the issuance of bottles of single malt scotch to your respective residences.
Your “Sunday of The Troubles” NFL Open Thread
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566 Comments
Flacco rushing TD! Someone’s going to celebrate with chocolate milk tonight!
Don’t get out of hand; chocolate milk is for if you have not been there before.
THIS INSANITY LEAGUE MATCHUP THIS WEEK I CALL GIVING THE CAT A BATH BECAUSE IT INVOLVES BALLS DOMINATING ME
Shit I feel bad for Josh Norman. He’s gotta feel like the only competent dude out there on defense
He is the only competent dude on our defense
BK has 10 nuggets for only $1.99-that’s a lot of sawdust!
a lot of pressure for each local franchise to catch rats at night, too!
Andy Reid’s now doing Progressive commercials?
He probably assumed they were Progresso commercials.
Do you provide coverage for bad clock management?
No.
What about my lunch?
Hey, Mike Wallace took a handoff from Flacco! Exciting!
I hate myself for owning zero shares of Sterling Shepard.
The Lord IS My SHEPHERDDOWN!
FACK YOU, NORTHWESTERN MONKEY BOY
When it Bobby Rainey, it pours.
SEE, REDSHIRT????
YOUR MOM LIKES IT HIGH AND LOW SIEMIAN!
I fluctuate back in time again and I’m forced to use firefox? GAHHH! It’s the fucking darkest timeline again. I’M COMING FOR YOUR BEERS YOU DERPWITS!
Pryor playing QB – a bold strategy?
Screw you sideways, BLEERGH!
our LORD will NOT be mocked!!!!
I see the Cincy turf is still Mike Brown quality.
Started Vereen and sat Matt Jones-SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT!
I know it’s asinine to put too much stock into “projected points”, but honestly I think what pisses me off the most is how dramatically projections seem to change the second games start.
1:00 to 1:02 saw a thirty point swing. Wtf mate
Chris is my internet Dad; I shall not complain when the hamster falls off the wheel and site turns whiter than Chip Kelly’s birthday party. Chris maketh me stop my bitching, for he is doing a lot of work for free and will turn this car around RIGHT NOW if I do not shut up: he leadeth me beside the still waters where UPROX is but a faded memory. He restoreth my ability to make dick jokes and talk football with the sort of cretins I’d cross a busy street to avoid if I saw them in real life: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for the sake of disparaging Herr Goddell without fear of censorship, unless it will get him sued. Yea, though I walk through New England, I will fear no evil: for Chris is with us, or, if not actually with us, berating the company running the servers; his rod and his staff are his own business, and have no bearing whatsoever on our current predicament. He preparest a web-site before us in the presence of our enemies: he anointest my head with beer; my cup runneth over and I frantically slurp at the spillage so as not to waste any of that sweet, sweet alcohol. Surely goodness and mercy and dick jokes shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the KSK for ever.
test
I would not let go
Don’t get me started on deadpool gifs again, that turned ugly last time
Kevin James: Same Ol’ Shit, Tuesday at 8.
I bet this show lasts three years.
Only Three? Tim Allen STILL has a show ffs!
San Diego might be the team to beat in the West. For realsies.
But Rikki got my hopes up with the Raiders!
TIL: I don’t get the red zone channel
So according to the commercial I just saw, Southwest Airlines just became a nightclub?
You know, I was going to wait until half-time to start drinking and maybe not pass out before the late game but as usual the Skins just aren’t going to let me do that.
opening series? upsetting!
Narrative:OBJ/Norman! Watch it!
Giants Leading Wr: Rookie Shephard
Of course, our D finally stops someone on 3rd and long and our fucking special teams Redskins the shit out of it
Devantedown! Adams CAN catch. Who knew?
Running game! Cincinnati found its running game!
Sweet it works! For now. And we have our first special teams derp of the day!
Redskins D done a good?
Never mind, the O decided to make up for it.
Special teams made up for it.
I see your Far Side and raise you one PBF comic:
http://pbfcomics.com/archive_b/PBF084-No_Survivors.gif
You can’t raise Far Side.
Gary Larson needs to come out of retirement for at least one more book.
TannyFannyCEPTION!!!!
Don’t let me down, Vereen…
Any reason to start the other open thread, then delete it?
Panic. Sheer panic.
Oh. Well not the first or the last time for talking to myself.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/48dcaaa4892a411492439cfe24d93fc5/tumblr_o9ywwrsbqF1qlz1v3o1_500.jpg
I’m not sure of the Donks chances for this one, simians have done well in Cincy lately.
+1 dick out for Trevor
*Haven’t
So with starting on the road for the 7th straight year, having to start with two straight games on the road, not letting the Bengals wear white helmets with their white color-rush jerseys, and having the same refs from The Wild Card Game who kept their flags in the pockets for about 59:30 into the game…
…I’m starting to think the NFL hate the Bengals.
I’m going Dallas over Miami in Survivor because I am stupid.
Hippo’s team vs. Hippo’s asshole little brother who is voting FOAR TRUMP’s team.
GO DONKS. FOAR THE GREATER GOOD!!!
at least his even more conservative and racist wife refuses to vote because she doesn’t want to get called for jury duty…
If you excuse the pony reference, I humbly submit this song for candidate for an Official Song of DFO.
between the pony and the Trestman references, I shudder to think of all the government watchlists we are all on.
HAI, feds!!!!
Knowing my pony reference and the rest of my, er, search history, if federal agents haven’t broken down my door yet, I think we’re okay.
Josh Norman and ODB get to finally settle scores in meatspace vs. Twitterspace after 9+ months.
Bleergh is most pleased.
Why did you open two ….open threads?
http://67.media.tumblr.com/3fe8f78b628f60e41711054d1e17fc3f/tumblr_ocwp8qpiTY1uncl2mo1_500.gif
Well fuck.
I love it when medical experts say they’d be shocked if Arian Foster ever played football again. Super happy I drafted him.
Btw, I don’t have to pretend to care about my Brian Hoyer-led Bears until 8:30pm and the lady friend is gone all day. Perfect day to sit on the couch and let the red zone seep into my eyeballs/soul.
$12 bottles of scotch are going to be a little off my usual palate.
Yo.
hey, we know they is games, scotchy. If you want to try e-mailing the long-form preview to me, I will see if I can edit and save since somehow I go the EPL thread to load Friday night.
I call this Scot(ch):
http://www.youthensnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/karen-gill.png
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