Old Man Begs For Cash

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Webmaster: Dick Joke Blog at Evil Corp
DTZM escaped his dark timeline through a wormhole created by Lord Screech, after he destroyed Bayside for never allowing him to mate with Lisa Turtle.Zach now lives a quiet life in St. Louis with his wife, Darkest Timeline Kelly Kapowski.They have no children, but do have the world’s cutest dogs.
Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Latest posts by Darkest Timeline Zack Morris (see all)

Hey guys, my birthday is next week.  If you’ve ever wanted to do something nice for old Internet Dad, please think about a donation in DFO’s name to Planned Parenthood or the ACLU or any of the awesome organizations working to help people right now.  Or send scotch.

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris
Darkest Timeline Zack Morris
DTZM escaped his dark timeline through a wormhole created by Lord Screech, after he destroyed Bayside for never allowing him to mate with Lisa Turtle. Zach now lives a quiet life in St. Louis with his wife, Darkest Timeline Kelly Kapowski. They have no children, but do have the world's cutest dogs.

25
Leave a Reply

Please Login to comment
10 Comment threads
15 Thread replies
0 Followers
 
Most reacted comment
Hottest comment thread
13 Comment authors
Horatio CornblowerInternetDadblackroseMD1blaxabbathCuntler Recent comment authors
  Subscribe  
Notify of
Horatio Cornblower

The average price of an abortion is, according the interent, @ $490.00

I will be donating that amount to Planned Parenthood, but not in DFO’s name.

In Mike Pence’s. Congratulations Mike, you just paid for an abortion.

blackroseMD1

You got it, man. Just donated to both of them along with the SPLC.

By the way, happy early birthday, DTZM!

InternetDad

Thank you! I really appreciate it so much. I’m at full freakout on T@#$P right now. I’m calling random senators and screaming incoherently about Betsy DeVos today.

blaxabbath

comment image

Cuntler

Hey, I took a bunch of kids to march in Denver. On a Saturday. In the morning!

Actually, I signed up to do pro bono work with this organization: http://www.rmian.org/volunteer/ I suggest signing up for something similar if you can.

Also, I’m not exactly pro Bono. I am kind of indifferent to U2.

InternetDad

That’s a great suggestion. I’m working with the teacher’s union right now to try to stop Betsy DeVos from endumbening your kids.

Old School Zero

Done, and done again.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ive already donated to both these organizations and sent you booze. So now what?

InternetDad

Ha! There are a lot of other organizations that could use support, like the Southern Poverty Law Center.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I’d add the effective environmental organizations too. I belong to a couple of free thought and separation of church and state. I didn’t donate much at all last year….. my donations are going up every month now.

Horatio Cornblower

The Sierra Club and National Resources Defense Counsel come to mind.

JerBear50
JerBear50

Now you should send me booze. I live in the south for fucks sake. You know the kind of stupidity I’m having to listen to?

InternetDad

Hey, I live in the Midwest. We are just as stupid. Although I live in Illinois, home of Badass Barry and Tough Tammy Duckworth.

SonOfSpam

I think of us a one great big family, so I made a donation in your name to Focus On The Family. They seem nice.

(j/k really I walked up to my Republican neighbor and punched her in the face and said “WELCOME TO THE DFO, BITCH” and then stepped on her throat.)

InternetDad

Perfect. That’s the gift that keeps on giving.

blaxabbath

I prefer something more tangible. How about this?

comment image

I mean, saving the world is good, right?

comment image

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

On Saturday, Dr. Mrs. Deadly, J.D. answered the call to go to LAX and take statements. They already had enough volunteers so she didn’t end up doing anything, but I’m still very proud of her for going. She mentioned this morning wanting to give money to the ACLU and I said “absolutely”. I regret not saying “abso-fucking-lutely”.

blaxabbath

How much was her Uber to the airport?

Unsurprised
Unsurprised

I love how smoothly Lyft slid in to capitalize on its mistake, as if it’s not equally as bad for being an anti-labor dodge concocted by entitled, overpaid techbro assholes.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

A trip to LAX is close to the ultimate sacrifice.