The marathon is almost over. You can see the finish line cresting just over the hill. Just. Keep. Drinking!!
#16MW UC-Davis v. #1MW Kansas (6:50, TNT)
Again…win the game, Aggies…I buy a shirt. But I suspect I sneak in a power nap here. Fuck the Jayhawks, fuck Sam Brownback, fuck Josh Jackson.
#10S Wichita State v. #7S Dayton (7:10, CBS)
Set your alarms for this one, though, because Scary Wheat and the Fightin’ Archies is the game of the day. These be true mid-major titans, with top-notch coaches and deep, veteran teams. It will be a very fun, high-level chess match for the viewer.
#15E Troy v. #2E Duke (7:20, TBS)
Christ, I am really running out of fucking shirt money here.
#11S Kansas State v. #6S Cincinnati (7:27, truTV)
K State?? Oh, you best believe they a Hippo Sleeper (Elite Eight potential). Cincinnati?? Grossly overrated. Though home to one of history’s most underrated sitcom’s, WKRP in Cincinnati. “With God as my witness, I thought a turkey could fly.”
#9MW Michigan State v. #8MW Miami (9:20, TNT)
At what point do we get to set aside the Tom Izzo hoodoo and just admit that Sparty ain’t much account this season? I guess after they lose to Miami, another well-coached side who has been playing much better basketball.
#15S Northern Kentucky v. #2 Kentucky (9:40, CBS)
The Norse may be dancin’ – but the only “white power” in effect tonight will be the white lightnin’ being consumed in hollers all over the Commonwealth in celebration of Big Blue whoopin’ ass.
#10E Marquette v. #7E South Carolina (9:50, TBS)
Somehow, I don’t think I managed to see Wojo’s Warriors play all season. But I am comfortable saying they are better than South Cakalaky because they are not South Cakalaky.
#14S Kent State v. #3 UCLA (9:57, truTV)
Antonio Gates ain’t walking through that door, Golden Flashes. And they also probably won’t let you change the game to football, either. Though Lonzo Ball’s dad assures you his sons would whip your ass at that, too.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/555fb5b31598a7c99f94197ae4a50cd3/tumblr_o6sf8sjBF31u2gscjo1_540.jpg
I’m not a fan of the idea of “moral victories”, but the fact that Northern Kentucky (which has been in D1 for only like five years) didn’t get completely ran off by Kentucky is actually impressive.
Now we can move on to what we really want…..
http://68.media.tumblr.com/22a3ff5757eca69c8a575ddcdb78b1fd/tumblr_n8ik04I1Ie1qzfsnio1_1280.jpg
http://68.media.tumblr.com/0468ccfc34f8f3e664d7ca217f5cb8e8/tumblr_o5lvymTLxL1qewacoo1_540.jpg
Lehigh over Duke is still one of my all-time favorite upsets. I think it’s because big, bad Duke lost to a school whose name (Lehigh Mountain Hawks) sounds like something you’d hear on an episode of Newhart.
Northern Iowa over Kansas is a pretty close second.
When I was in Missouri, a Mizzou guy hated Kansas so much that whenever a team upset Kansas in the tournament, he’d go out and buy a shirt of the upsetting team and wear it proudly.
Does Tom Izzo have some kind of blood oath contract with the Roman god, Mars? There can’t be any other explanation for Sparty’s success in March.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/e697887457df2cda9f21b7f645232f54/tumblr_o29ej5y0Ak1s01qkyo1_500.gif
Four stars, check it out!
Izzo’s success in the tournament makes that loss to Middle Tennessee all the more shocking.
He got a larger dose of whatever Belichick and Brady got.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/905fc2de646df95179b1de0adea14b3a/tumblr_ocz7v6PK7a1v27hgco1_500.jpg
http://68.media.tumblr.com/29b05931ec08b34ba17247745da6f137/tumblr_obtm8uB5RJ1rvzucio1_500.jpg
http://68.media.tumblr.com/cb8066d2b87c4b6f0faf6b0c8b151d27/tumblr_oavmy37jDs1qgknz0o1_400.gif
Might be my favorite episode of any cartoon, ever.
http://68.media.tumblr.com/42e5d996836d31c7704dee0003d212ac/tumblr_o6ctw1ieOy1r0s0xdo1_500.jpg
I guess it was too much to hope for an Irish Xmas miracle of Duke losing to Troy…
http://static1.1.sqspcdn.com/static/f/709071/26863195/1455732301677/unforgiven-dukeofdeath.jpg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IEgkDuJyI0U
Big Milkmen fan over here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6ZtHrWiSAk
http://68.media.tumblr.com/099ae9ec62af11c9c8de56c8375a83f5/tumblr_oh7wxj5BDn1r43ujbo1_1280.png
http://68.media.tumblr.com/6507a1192ffabe17c44fafc1734af7ab/tumblr_okpn14XDYV1re4ysso1_500.gif
BOTH.
YES
NKU fans in about 10 minutes:
http://oi52.tinypic.com/33xx7o7.jpg
Dude, they actually for reals have fans? I assumed the whole area was UK fans, exceptin’ fer who went to Louisville…
Actually, the counties in Northern Kentucky hates UK. Ohio has a weird thing too; Metro Cincinnati completely hates Ohio State.
The Indiana counties are just there wondering if anyone knows they exist.
I’m always a little surprised that Ohio State and Cincinnati rarely play against each other in anything. I’m guessing there just isn’t a strong enough reason or desire to start something?
http://68.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_me40l8JJQ81ric2iqo1_500.jpg
?t=1
You had one job, Troy University.
I can’t remember the last time I had a drink, although I definitely had two at the building Valentine’s Day party and maybe one since.
Gave up the booze in lieu of PCP, eh?
No, poverty.
God damn, what a sequence by the Most Neutral of College Basketball Teams.
Maybe
Everything about this is hotter than sex.
h
ttps://i.imgur.com/4EDu8PL.gifv
Yeah, slice into that pie.
I want to believe, with all my heart, that a #16 can beat a #1. That it’s not impossible. But, man, I just don’t know…
I wish I was getting drunk now and she was serving me.
Barkley in that Kent State jersey is the worst thing to ever happen to Kent State.
I saw Barkley in the Kent State jersey and for a second I thought he was wearing a bright yellow bib.
He’s probably using it as one.
I now present a list of recent basketball related phrases that need to stop and desist immediately.
1. Euro Step- Fuck you that’s a non-called travelling violation.
2. The run-out – no shithead that’s a “fast break” You can call it a “break” for reasons of brevity.
3. Score the basketball – just, fuck you! Do you say that Le’Veon Bell “scores the football?” No.
4. Heat check – motherfucker missed a “3” that is all.
http://s.mlkshk-cdn.com/r/5XEG
I agree with every single point here. May I add?
In Ice football 1. Heavy shot – there is no weight in a shot.
2. Pitching a shutout. – pitching has nothing to do with it.
Point of order: neither does “pitching a tent” in either the literal or euphemistic usages
My brackets are all ded, I’ve disowned my alma mater, Everton looks like we (YES GODDAMNIT WE) could lose our two best players, and I’m so depressed I can’t even drink.
The Round of 32 previews will suck and be angry. I apologize in advance.
Well they tune in to heart wrenching Championship action when Wolves visit the Cottage this weekend. WE SELL YOU THE WHOLE SEAT!!! BUT YOU WILL ONLY NEED THE EDGE!!!!
hey, at least you only need a draw now!!
Channel your inner ZODIAC MOTHERFUCKER
//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js
Been there, my Regal mammal. Don’t hold back; go Scorched Earth.
oh yes, BURN EVERYTHING is a nice mental space right now. Even smiled faintly
https://youtu.be/hLnecKDUweA
I have not seen 1 Fast and Furious movie.
So your brain cells are doing pretty good
I watched 20 minutes of one, but in my defense Eva Mendes was involved.
I’ve seen them all. They’re like fast food – a total guilty pleasure – a tried and true formula – but it hits the spot every damn time no matter where you are.
That is a great observation. Kinda like spy movies for me.
I saw the first one just because they filmed it in my old home town of San Pedro.
It was alright.
Then I stopped after the 2nd one.
Beer #9
I’m somewhere between 11-13. I’m starting to get there.
Fuck it.
Here comes 11 AND 12.
Can’t drink beer. I overate at a St. Patrick’s Day Party at work. Now it feels like my stomach acid is being redirected to throat.
If they make an alcoholic Tums, I’d be right on it.
Might be time to smoke a little something something.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3aV7CoZ84fM
It is green…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5P1SzaJ3jk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zzrh5GftgzM
I’m watching a shirtless Spock mount a shirtless Kirk. Its not often someone’s slashfic script is bought to screen.
can you describe it? Slowly.
I’m watching Die Hard.
I’m watching Kirk, Spock and McCoy dressed as Nazis.
(Sunday)
Dad: “Who does Cincinnati play?”
Me: “Winner of Kansas State and Wake Forest on Friday?”
Dad: “Want to watch the game with me?”
Me: “Sure!”
(Thursday)
Dad: “When does Cincinnati play?”
Me: “Tomorrow at 7:30.”
Dad: “See you then!”
(Friday)
Me: “I’m here to watch the game.”
Dad: (snoring)
https://pixxxels.org/image/oqk5rtb81
https://pixxxels.org/image/l885vfac1
Looks like you’re getting the exact guy you didn’t want, Hippo:
http://www.espn.com/mens-college-basketball/story/_/id/18935743/nc-state-wolfpack-hire-kevin-keatts-coach
I would say FACK YOU, but you are right to laugh. I am done with wolven athletics. Not another dime or scrap of effort/attention from me. SO MUCH wasted.
Methinks tWBS may be ded
You can join my Division III bandwagon! No athletic scholarships means that only the GRITTIEST kids who Really Love The Game play! /hides tears that both Wash U teams bombed out of the tournaments
Thanks, Peloton! I definitely want to broadcast my face while I’m on exercise bike feeling like my heart is about to explode.
Here’s what I’ve been cooking this afternoon.
Cheers!
Extra Stout? Solid choice.
It cuts right through the corned beef fat beautifully.
How could any of us not take a team with the nickname Shockers?
Nickname?!
http://www.totalprosports.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Hawk-Shocker-sack-celebration.gif
Hey, Fucknuts. I guess Sexy Friday is cancelled on account of nude leaks from this morning.
I feel really good today. I’ve gotten some steam in my match against depression, so I’d call today’s round a win in my favor.
EDIT: Goddammit, NMSU. I can’t say I’m surprised, but it still stings like I was visited by a Baylor athlete last night.
So Sexy Friday is cancelled on account of hand cramps and dehydration?
Oh, someone (Lemonjello and nomonkeyfun, doing the Lord’s Work) posted a bunch of bouncy titty gifs on the previous page while I was gone, but that was then and this is now. What have you done for me lately?
Watching all coverage of the NKU fans celebrating their team making the Dance is lovely and cool. If only I can see all their faces when Kentucky takes the court.
But if NKU can somehow pull off the upset, I may drive two hours to Lexington just to see all the UK fans’ shellshocked faces.
You’ve done a shit ton of good work with these previews, Hippo.
awwww, it’s just a lot of rote typing I mostly feels
Say what you want about all 90s SNL Movies not named “Wayne’s World” in the title, but “Coneheads” isn’t that bad. It at least meant well.
I thought The Ladies Man was funny.
1. It was 2000.
2. Yes, it had an original story, it had heart and it didn’t try to tell the same joke for 87 minutes.
3. It has this:
http://www.moviefancentral.com/images/pictures/52919/image_cf94bae24.jpg
She was very sexy in those years.
She may very well still be.
God as my witness, no clue why anyone would find David Spade or Adam Sandler funny.
I didn’t know Rhode Island was even a D1 school before this week.
I don’t know what I was smoking on Monday, but somehow I picked them into the Sweet 16.
What does it say about me that I did?
Spread is 23 here. Gimme UC-Davis.
the soundtrack to my kissing goodbye to my following Wolpfack sports (typo intentional).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JIitQNXVgb8
RIP (1973 – 2017)
P.S. Fuck Debbie Yow and Kevin Keatts
I thought Lamar Odom died.
His dick lived tho
T2 Trainspotting came out today.
And like Kelly Macdonald in the first, there is some solid nudity.
Love WKRP, any one know where to get it online? I know the music royalties is why it was not released on some form of dvd.
YouTube has a few episodes. Its not that hard to put generic music in place like WWE does with “Enter Sandman” and “Voodoo Child”.