Med as in Mediterranean, not a health care facility.  Yep, we’re doing Italian today, namely a pretty decent meat sauce, with pasta of course.

Looks like the Spring crop of fresh pasta is ready for harvest!

Yeah Right already made a far superior marinara with homemade fucking pasta (I still gotta do that) a few posts back, but this will do in a pinch and I promise you that this will knock the balls off any canned or jarred crap out there.  Yes, the tomato products are canned, but we can control the product quality, proportions and seasoning for much better results.

Let’s begin:

1 medium onion, diced

1 smallish red (yes!) or green (blech) bell pepper, also diced

A couple cloves of garlic, minced or through a press

1 fat tsp. oregano, another of basil (dried)

1 little can of tomato paste

24 ounces tomato puree

1 big can of crushed Italian plum tomatoes, slightly drained

Salt, pepper, blah blah blah…

Get some olive oil hot in a sizeable pan then toss in the onion and pepper:

Sweat this out over low heat until it starts to soften then add the garlic.  Garlic is harsh when burned, so the delay.

Oh, as you might have noticed, my getting-AARP-shit-in-the-mail ass has yet to figure out how to get a banner pic on the title page.  I’m pretty savvy on this computer machine, but I have yet to make the WordPress templates my bitch.  If any of you younger whipper-snappers with your U-tube and Tweeter posts have any advice, please throw Grandpappy a bone and I won’t chase you out of my yard.

Okay then, where were we?  Oh yeah, Home Economics.

Keep the veggies moving around over low heat until the smell just gets too fucking good, add a pinch of salt, then dump them out onto a plate.  Oh, if you’re into mushrooms (the culinary version, not the “end of 2001, A Space Odyssey” stuff), toss those in first to heat them through.  On to the most important stuff!

WE HAVE THE MEAT products (can’t risk a law suit from Arby’s):

I could use a pedicure, and there’s plenty of raisins left.

OK, I’m reeeeeally breaking one of my rules here.  I started grinding my own meat years ago, usually in bulk then vacuum-bagging by the pound and freezing (more details in a future post).  I haven’t bought anything pre-ground since.  I also make my own Italian sausage because it’s just too easy, but this is for a quick weekday meal so I took the inevitable shortcuts and went commercial.  It’s still good.

That’s a pound of shredded dead pig and however much a tray of Italian sausage weighs.  Cut the casings away from the sausage and break it up.  Add it to the hot pan with the pork and a touch more oil and brown away.  Keep this going over medium heat until just cooked through, then spoon out the excess grease.

Break that up a little more so it cooks evenly.

You might be asking why I didn’t just use all sausage?  Well, you certainly can, but I find that just comes out a little too rich, the heavily seasoned meat seems to overpower everything else.  Cutting in plain pork and adding our own herbage evens the flavors out a bit.

On that note, stir in the oregano and basil with a few grinds of black pepper, then dump the veggies back in as well as all the tomato products.  Stir this very thoroughly, reduce the heat to a strong simmer and cover.  This needs at least 30 minutes, an hour would be better.  Stir occasionally.

I upgraded to an almost empty peanut butter jar to level my pan out.

Now would be a good time to get some pasta ready.  Hopefully you made some of Yeah Right’s stuff and stashed it in the freezer, if not then we’ll have to settle for the dried variety.  I like fettuccine for this, but use whatever works for you.  Just don’t overcook it!

Give the sauce a taste and add salt if necessary.  If it’s a little thin and needs salt, here’s a dirty secret you don’t want to tell anyone about.  Those little packets of Parmesan “cheese” that come with take-out pizza?  It’s pure crap, but actually works great as a thickener, and since it’s mostly salt anyway it helps there too.  If you have a couple packets laying around, stir those in and I promise not to tell anyone.  Optional, of course.

As far as sprinkling some real parm over your serving?  This is where you don’t dick around, get some of the real stuff and a microplane grater.  Don’t be shy with that shit either.

Serve however you like.  If everything is getting eaten now, you can mix all the sauce directly into the pasta and dish it out.  Otherwise I like to keep the pasta separate so it doesn’t get too soggy while waiting patiently in the fridge for a late night drunken noshing.

Is that…that…

…BROCCOLI!?!?!/1/1

Shit, here we go again.  At least Moose would like it.  Actually, that’s Mrs. Nobyl’s plate, she loves the stuff.  My plate was similar; but instead of pasta with meat sauce and broccoli, I had pasta, meat sauce and more pasta with meat sauce.  Garlic bread?  Oh hell yes, just make it right.  A good Merlot or Cab will also pair nicely.

This is a blank slate as always, I’ve made this many times and always change it up a bit just for teh shits.  I once used a bunch of fresh, ripe Roma tomatoes, blanched, peeled and seeded, in place of the canned crushed berries.  It was more work and time but really worth it.  For the record, I steer clear of canned diced tomatoes.  They usually contain calcium chloride to keep the pieces firmed up, one more chemical I’d just as soon avoid.

Next week it’s back to the grill, it’s a state ordinance that Texas finds punishable by death.  See you then!