Rams at the Bye – A Tale of Redemption and How Much Jeff Fisher Sucks

A few months ago, some idiot writer previewed the Cleveland Los Angeles St. Louis no wait once again it actually is Los Angeles Rams for the 2017 season. After breaking down the strengths and weaknesses of the team (and introducing #ThePauls to our shared lexicon), the writer predicted that the Rams would finish this season 4-12. HURR DURR JUST LIEK POLES PREDICTING HILLERY. Since the Rams are now at the bye bye bye (ain’t no lie), let’s see how things are going.

Todd Gurley is good at football and stuff.

The Rams are 5-2 and tied with the Seahawks for first place in the NFC West. I guess 4-12 ain’t gonna happen. What’s changed for this team, who was pretty crappy last year? We can start with the head coach. Little baby man Sean McVay apparently knows what he’s doing, despite only being 17 years old. Below-average mustache ride offerer Jeff Fisher apparently did not know what he was doing. Also, Jared Goff (#1 pick from 2016) is not lousy. He might just be a decent NFL quarterback. If he overcame being named Jared, I guess he can overcome a bad rookie season. Todd Gurley is back to being as beastly as he was two years ago. The receiving corps is no longer referred to as “the receiving corpse” (it’s totally not gay if the corpse is receiving).

The team defense has been spotty, and while Aaron Donald’s return has improved the front seven, the secondary is still burnable. So far, however, the Rams have gotten away with defensive issues by outscoring their opponents. And the punter/kicker combo of Johnny Hekker and Greg Zeuerlein is probably the best in the NFL right now. Given the age of the key players, the Rams have the pieces in place to be contenders for the next five years or so. By that time, the new stadium will probably only be a few short years away from opening!

So what’s the outlook for the rest of the 2017 season? Glad you asked, voice in my head. Shut up I’ll deal with her later after I pick up the tubing at Home Depot holy crap you get impatient sometimes but I can’t stay mad at you after all you were there for me through all the fires and blood sacrifice and it was so loud I mean so so so loud with the screaming if you hadn’t been humming Schubert’s Erlkönig I really would’ve lost it I’m sorry please don’t go

So what’s the outlook for the rest of the 2017 season? The rest of the schedule is split between good and crappy teams, so assuming the play at the same level, the Rams have a good shot at 10-6. A playoff berth is definitely within reach provided their key players stay healthy (duh) and the defense improves a little. The biggest game will be at Seattle and could decide the division, provided that Scary 12th Man doesn’t intimidate the Rams into forfeiting the game because they’re the best fans you guys. THEY THROW FISH IN SEATTLE!

Pike Place is a tourist haven.

Also, damn, Jeff Fisher sucked.

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SonOfSpam
SonOfSpam is a mediocre ship captain and an even worse writer. He is allowed to contribute to this website in exchange for money and drugs. Please don't encourage him or make direct eye contact.
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Wakezilla

Amazing, this team is 5-2 and I still think they’re finishing 7-9

montythisseemsstrangetome

Todd Gurley was the only aspect of the Rams that I was disappointed was leaving StL.

Beerguyrob

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I liked it, you sly dog.

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ooooh, I’m an idiot. Well played.

blaxabbath

Fuck the Rams. Kroenke screwed STL and took the team to LA for business-only reasons and now they’re finding success? Fuck that. Kroenke, Trump, Kushner, Brady….at some point someone in this country needs to get what they deserve (googles Home Depots in LA).

Brocky

I’m 90% percent sure I’m gonna kill Mike pence. Won’t be pre meditated, he’ll just walk into the wrong 7 11 at the wrong time

blaxabbath

When do you honestly think the last time was that Mike Pence went inside a convenience store?

Wakezilla

My guess, to buy a burner to get a hold of a rent-a-boy. Nobody can be that homophobic unless they’re a power bottom.

Beerguyrob

Yay! Clicks are going to skyrocket now that we’re on a watch list.

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ballsofsteelandfury

I want to frame everything in between “So what’s the outlook for the rest of the 2017 season?”

montythisseemsstrangetome

Weird, the voice in my head says the same things but in a British accent.

laserguru

I turned down a ticket to see Rams Saints on thanksgiving weekend. I’m interested in the matchup just not in the colosseum.

Nice job.

LemonJello

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I was expecting a Joker, Joker…JOKER reference.

Still, good jorb! RAMMIT IS FOR REAL, YA’LLS

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“I miss you more than Stan Kroenke missed the point
And that’s an awful lot guys
And now, now you’ve gone away
And all I’m trying to say is
Jeff Fisher sucked, and I miss you.”

– residents of St. Louis

blaxabbath

“Why does Jeff Fischer get to keep on coaching football? His Rams sucked…just a little bit more…than I miss you.”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

But was Jeff Fisher’s sucking fairly even?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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