INT. CLEVELAND BROWNS TEAM HEADQUARTERS – DAY

—

HUE JACKSON: Welcome!  Thanks for coming in for this interview.

BEN McADOO: [shakes hand] It’s a pleasure, Hue.

HUE: Please, call me Coach Jackson.

BEN: Um, sure.  Thanks very much for this opportunity, Coach Jackson.

HUE: Head Coach Jackson.

BEN: Right.

HUE: Now Ben, you’re aware of my works in this league.  What you do you think is my greatest achievement as a coach?

BEN: I…um…

HUE: You’d probably point to that season when I coached the Raiders to 8 and 8.  No?

BEN: I suppose, yes.

HUE: But do you know why I consider that to be my greatest achievement?

BEN: Cause it’s the best record you’ve had as a head coach?

HUE: It’s for symmetry of it!  A perfectly balanced season!  The very graphical representation of it is perfectly symmetrical!  8-8.  It’s a palindrome and an ambigram all at once!

BEN: I see.

HUE: Do you, though, Ben?  Too many folks here in the NFL are obsessed with this idea of perfection.  There’s a conception that perfection is beautiful.  [pounds desk] THIS IS NONSENSE!  Is there anything beautiful about perfect darkness?  Or perfect light, for that matter?  Why, you’d squint your eyes shut within seconds to be free of the cloying brightness of it all!  But symmetry…balance…this is where true beauty lies.  Observe.

HUE gestures to a framed painting on his wall.

HUE: This yin, this yang.  This perfect union, this eternal chase for balance, this is what I treasure.

BEN: To be honest, Coach, I’m not sure eight-and-eight is gonna cut it with Haslam.

HUE: Perhaps.  His and my goals may yet…diverge.  But this bookkeeping of wins and losses, this will not be your concern if you are chosen to serve among my staff. Your assignment will be much more focused.  I want you to bring symmetry to my offense.

BEN: Symmetry…you mean balance?  Like, using the run to set up the pass?  Sure, when I was coordinator for the Giants…

HUE: [interrupts] Symmetry, man!  Take a look at this offensive formation.

HUE: This is to be the backbone, ha ha, of your offense this season.

BEN: That…looks like the wishbone.

HUE: That’s right.

BEN: [frowning] The wishbone hasn’t been used seriously in college football in thirty years.  And nobody’s ever used it in the pros.  Pardon my frankness, but if you build an offense around some gimmicky triple option wishbone then the Browns will be going 0-16 again.

HUE: [stands, and turns his back to BEN] Ben, do you think it bothered me to go oh-and-sixteen?

BEN: Um…

HUE: It did not.  Any theories as to why?

BEN: Cause of your thing about balance.

HUE: That’s right, Ben.  [turns around, holding a long piece of fluorescent string between his two outstretched hands]

HUE: What do you get when you divide one by two?

BEN: One half.

HUE: [looping the string around one finger and doubling it up] And dividing by two again?

BEN: One quarter.

HUE repeats the looping gesture, and twists the string so that a new pattern is formed.

HUE: Again!

BEN: One eighth.

HUE: AND AGAIN!

BEN: [eyes glaze over] One…sixteenth.

The pattern of the string has now become impossibly complex, symmetric, and beautiful.

HUE: One last time.

BEN: [all of the emotion has been drained from his voice] One thirty-second.

HUE: Not one and thirty-one…one of thirty-two.  Do you see?

BEN: Yes…yes, I do see.

HUE: Very good. Ben, if you were to work with me, my goals would not always seem clear to you.  Would you be able to accept that?

BEN: [still gazing vacantly at the cat’s cradle] I can accept that.

HUE: But you would know that they were always in the interest of symmetry.  You would be willing to sacrifice your own interests in service of that?

BEN: Yes.

HUE: Even at times when you will face great pressure, from both the press, players, and fans, to do things differently?

BEN: The fans are not the coach of this team.

HUE: [smiles] Ben, I have a good feeling about you.  I believe we’ll be able to get along well together.  I’d like you to work for me.  I trust you are still are interested in the position?

BEN: Yes, very much interested.

HUE: Excellent, excellent.  Now when I count to three, you will remember nothing of this part of our conversation.  But your goal, for this team, for me, will be symmetry.  Always symmetry.

BEN: Symmetry.

HUE: Are you ready to wake up?

BEN: Yes.

HUE: Very well.  One…two…three.

[fin]