Your “I Scream, You Scream….Wait, WHY ARE WE SCREAMING????” Friday Evening Open Thread

theeWeeBabySeamus

theeWeeBabySeamus

An unapologetic, even if often manic-depressive (it’s a requirement given his choices of sports teams), fan of NC State University, the Baltimore Ravens and the Baltimore Orioles.When not parked in front of the computer and/or TV, can often be found on the golf course shouting obscenities to no one in particular.
theeWeeBabySeamus

I’m not gonna sugarcoat this.  I’ve had a really bad week.  From many different fronts.

Frankly, I’m pissed off at the world and just about everyone in it.  And I’m not in the mood to talk about it.

So at the very least, you’re not gonna have to read my ramblings this week.  You folks can count yourselves lucky there.

But a few very good men, whose names totally don’t rhyme with, BallsofSteelandFury, Low Commander of the Super Soldiers, and Rikki-Tikki-Deadly ….  Well, I guess the best way to say it is that they talked me down and/or called me out on my bullshit, respectively.

Life has kinda stunk more often than not for me lately.  There are reasons for that, but again I’m not in the mood to talk about it.  Admittedly, some days, I don’t handle it as well as I might wish.

But when you have friends who care?  Good people who genuinely care and who will expend their time because they’re concerned about you?  Friends who are willing to tell you what you NEED to hear, instead of just what you WANT to hear?  Even if it’s just by being honest with you and telling you you’re being an asshole when you’re being an asshole?  You see where I’m going here?

That’s a pretty good deal.  That’s tough to beat.  I count myself lucky there.  I’ll take it.

(thank you, gentlemen….sincerely)


Drippy Drippy

Anywhoooooo….

FWIW, this week’s theme was Low Commander’s suggestion as well.  And it was a good one.  I think he must have seen this girl and… welllllll…..yeah….

Sexy Ice Cream is this week’s theme.

More on that in just a bit.  For now, you’ll have to wait.

At Least One Thing Went Well This Week

(aka your tWBS weed growing update for the week)

Would you lookit that little bastard right there?  I’m quite proud of myself here.  Those little squiggly white things at the top is a developing bud.

I can’t believe this plant recovered.  It literally got too top heavy and fell over on its side.  I thought the main stem was broken and that it was a goner.  I then stole some of my mother’s knitting needles (please don’t tell her) and staked them down and used them to prop it up.  And then it went batshit crazy the last coupla weeks as far as growth and flowering.

There are eight more buds (most out of frame) which are also flowering.  For now, they’re all very small and nothing to brag about.  But I might be able to harvest some and smoke it by Christmas.

Come on down that chimney, Santa.  I got you covered up in here.

DUDE?????????

OK, well please don’t call the cops and report me or I’ll have to kill his jolly fat ass.

And yes, I’m still waiting on that Colecovision system I asked for from 1982, you damned lying prick.

(I could have saved sooooooo many quarters if Santa hadn’t screwed me over)

This Week in DFO

I’m lazy this week so I’m not gonna do a full rundown.  And besides, it’s no contest this week.  Everyone did great work this week, don’t get me wrong.  We have about the best team of writers I could ever imagine having.

(although sometimes our judgement is questionable….maybe)

However….

As usual, BeerGuyRob  anchored many of the week’s open threads.  But he also did this, and this, and this, and this, and this.

BeerCanBobby  is Employee of the Week this week, far and away.

Plus, perhaps coincidentally, or perhaps not, he’s also now the newest co-owner of DFO, too!!!

And that’s a good thing.  A really good thing.

Le’Veon Bell could not be reached for comment.

Sports Which Will Melt Your Soul 2Nite

MLB Playoffs

  • Dodgers @ Brewers (LAD up 3-2) – 8:30pmEDT – TV: FS1

(Also, an obligatory…..Fuck off, Boston)

NHL

  • Wild @ Stars – 8:00pmEDT – TV: NBCSN

Full Schedule

NBA

  • Celtics @ Raptors – 8:00pmEDT – TV: ESPN
  • Warriors @ Jazz – 10:30pmEDT – TV: ESPN
  • Thunder @ Clippers – 10:30pmEDT – TV: NBATV

Full Schedule

NCAA Football

  • Colorado State @ Boise State – 9:00pmEDT – TV: ESPN2
  • Air Force @ UNLV – 10:00pmEDT – TV: CBSSN

I Scream

Enjoy….

Ahem…

I will make no comment about this last photo.  You may draw your own perverted conclusions however.

And I’ll be right back…

Dammit…I’ll be right back again.  Maybe…

Oy vey.

Have a great weekend, everyone.

Love ya’s.

(something something two scoops something something)

theeWeeBabySeamus
theeWeeBabySeamus
An unapologetic, even if often manic-depressive (it's a requirement given his choices of sports teams), fan of NC State University, the Baltimore Ravens and the Baltimore Orioles. When not parked in front of the computer and/or TV, can often be found on the golf course shouting obscenities to no one in particular.
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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

yeah right

Was that a lob pass?

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

I am so high on legal California marijuana!

Thanks to these drugs, I’m ready to go to the Hollywood Hills and kill the shit out of a couple of people.

Thank you, and God Bless

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Have fun!

And wear gloves!

yeah right

Bleach helps.

Just sayin’

Beerguyrob

“Nailed it.”

— Charles Manson

Doktor Zymm

Don’t ignore strangling as an option, we might get a good punk song or two out of it

yeah right

I love the word “garrotte.”

I so infrequently have a chance to use it in a sentence.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

“Trebuchet” is a favorite of mine. But unless I actually had one, I see little chance of my ever using it in a description of anything that happens in reality.

yeah right

If you were able to pass the “portcullis” on the way to the “garrotting” then we may have to fling you from the “trebuchet!”

I think we just wrote a script.

Beerguyrob

Your kind words are kind. Thank you.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

My pleasure.

yeah right

Love you beerguy!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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yeah right

For decades Prince protected his artistic property like it was gold.

Because it was.

The poor guy is barely cold and I see a fucking popcorn commercial using “Let’s get Crazy” as it’s bump music.

That’s some sad fucking shit right there.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Hope Chevy has enough decency to leave Little Red Corvette alone.

Doktor Zymm

I graduated HS in 1999, guess what our prom theme was? (Ed. Note, I did not go to prom)

Doktor Zymm

Also, one of the first IFTTT recipies was to turn your smart lights purple when the forecast was for rain 🙂

Doktor Zymm

I wish that my political philosophy was common enough to have a party, or at least a name

yeah right

I think we’ve started a party.

Right here.

How you doin’ Dok?

Good to hear from yez.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Keep this up, the AFA might go down like an F-22 hangar at Tyndall AFB.

Edit: Shanklor says, no harm no foul.

Doktor Zymm

Maybe there will be an AFC movie about it

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Doktor Zymm

When I was a kid I wanted to live in the Kennedy Center. That’s totally normal, right?

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Center for the Performing Arts or Space Center? I was always a space geek.

Doktor Zymm

Performing Arts. I didn’t have any opportunities to run around the Space Center as a kid, although Air and Space was my favorite museum. One of Amelia Earhart ‘s planes was my favorite exhibit

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

I grew up across the river from the Kennedy Center, which is about two miles. Washington DC was a small hick town back then.

Doktor Zymm

Don’t undersell, there were a couple years there where it was murder capital!

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

My dad had to drive to work on Nebraska Avenue during the 1968 9th Street riots, right through the belly of the riot beast. He kept his handgun on the passenger seat next to him in his ’66 Buick Wildcat. Still alive today, though.

Doktor Zymm

Wow, that’s a hell of a story, would love to hear more. I love personal accounts of even the mundane bits of history

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

He lived through some interesting times, and has some pretty cool stories, especially about the early 60s setting up air bases in Thailand and S. Vietnam as that situation ramped up, and flying as an aircrew on RB-50s out of Japan on spy missions over Red China and the USSR in the mid-50s. I converted him from being a lifelong Republican in about 1990, and despite the residual racism inherent in most people who came up in the 40s and 50s that he occasionally exhibits, he’s still a fun guy to hang and drink with. He only stopped smoking weed a few years ago, mostly due to difficulty in obtaining out in the sticks where he lives.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Well, since I work for the USAF Civil Engineer, and count several ex-Colorado Springs ring-knockers among my co-workers, I guess I am morally obligated to watch this AF-UNLV matchup. Also still have a mostly full cocktail.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Weird, I’ve had a shit of projects at the USAFA over the years. The bomber Mary painting in the chapel was my favorite discovery.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

We’ve been working on awarding a project to upgrade the AFA Chapel for the last several years. Just the design has taken that long. How do you put fire sprinklers in that building without destroying the aesthetic? I have distanced myself quite successfully from the cluster fuck that the project will be. They are doing the source selection for the construction task order at this time.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

There were some good ideas about sprinkler lines in there when some new lighting was put in, but at huge cost. My favorite projects were the campus heating system; the high temperature heating water piped around to to the various buildings. Not many of those type of systems around.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Last I knew the Chapel project was approaching a programmed amount of $100M. I’d rather jack off a mad lion than be the PM on a high-vis high-$$$ project like that.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

We didn’t do many project there after they privatized the CE.

That does sound like a cluster.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

yeah, the civilian CE folks there now are a bunch of prima donnas.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I worked with civilian CE people that worked directly for the Academy and were under an officer. They fired or retired all those people and had a private firm come in, and when the profit motive was introduced so was the finger pointing when things went wrong; a lot of stuff went to shit. Privatizing certainly doesn’t make things more efficient in most cases.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Good old Dick Cheney. His legacy lives on.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

I like the mushroom cloud portrayed in the stained glass at the chapel at Offutt AFB. I was stunned when I found out it existed. But I mean, Curtis Lemay; what the fuck you gonna do?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

My dad had an encounter with that guy, indirectly. He was out of uniform and lost a rank or two if I remember the story right. “Bomb them back into the stone age.”

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

You’re the same age as me. And also a veteran.

Just sayin

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Air Force brat, worked for the AF for the last 20 years, but active duty in the Navy. My heart is always torn twixt the Silver and Blue and the Haze Gray and Underway.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

You were in the Navy though, if I remember your posts.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Fronkenshteen

I wonder where that ukulele is right now?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That ukulele has seen some things, man.

Fronkenshteen

Well it’s DEFINITELY seeing “something” in that picture!

Fronkenshteen

If I was a journalist right now, there’s a 100% chance that at all times, I would be carrying a high-powered firearm around with a concealed carry permit. Jared Kushner stole classified U.S. intelligence and used it to facilitate torture, imprisonment, kidnapping, murder, and the dismemberment of a corpse. And nothing of any consequence is going to happen to him as a result of his actions. The rule of law has crumbled. Its every man for himself now.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

A quick run through the headlines makes me pleased that I am not going to have to live beyond the next 20 years. I do feel bad for my relatives and their spawn, and the hell they are going to live through. But most of them are too busy Facebooking and Instragramming cute dog videos to pay attention.

I really hope the killer asteroid hits just west of me, and I can watch the world die on FOX news as the death cloud moves around the world until it finally reaches here.

Doktor Zymm

Rule of law hasn’t crumbled, but it has been made more explicit that it only applies to certain folk. My remaining hope is that this is the last gasp of backlash before things change for good. I don’t think humans are truly capable of equity, but we can and will do far better than this.

Doktor Zymm

So, it’s actually impossible to pour just a shot of liquor into a wine glass, right? It just looks sad and pathetic unless it’s at least a triple shot in there

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Impossible? No. But I do agree, it does look very sad.

Doktor Zymm

The only time I almost ended up in the hospital for drink, it was a whiskey tasting staffed by wine tasting folk. They poured as they would pour wine tasters. So, basically a shot each taste. And hell no I don’t spit. I was marking stuff off for most of the night, and I probably ended at almost 30. It’s more than what killed Dylan Thomas

Spur
Spur

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Those Cheeseheads! It’s like they hate us.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Spur
Spur

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Looks like I’ll be spending tomorrow evening watching game 7

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

And we will see you tomorrow night!

-Jack Buck
–Joe Buck
—Joe Buck

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

JOE BUCK JUST CAME IN HIS OWN MOUTH

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

I’m too old for this to be appropriate anymore, but if I had been able to suck my own dick in my 20s, 30s, or 40s, I never would have left my house.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

HI-YOHHHH

Doktor Zymm

If you weren’t committed enough to have a rib or two removed like the rumor about Marilyn Manson, then you weren’t committed enough to become a hermit. You may have been inadequately dressed, but you would have at least walked through a taco bell drive thru

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

You must unknowingly know me IRL.

Spur
Spur

should i be watching this game?

Spur
Spur

Fronkenshteen

I just downloaded the Draft app and entered a couple of money games. That shit is like crack!

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

DFS is dangerously addictive

Fronkenshteen
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

I’m really high and this baseball game is freaking me out.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Saw David Byrne for the 3rd time this year last Tuesday. Except for the change to one different song during the encore, it was the same as it ever was. But still fucking awesome.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Doktor Zymm

Do you think that evangelical players could object to stealing bases because of the ten commandments?

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

I’m sure they could find some way to hypocritically justify their thefts.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Plus one hundred thousand “evangelical” politicians.

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Audi A7 ad guy looks like Bill Cowher and Sean McVay had an illegitimate child.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Doktor Zymm

I knew there was a reason men prefer bar soap to shower gel

Spur
Spur

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Doktor Zymm

Not going to open another bottle of wine, so the question becomes; gin or bourbon?

Spur
Spur

Bourbon and weed.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Brand choice?

Doktor Zymm

bulleit v beefeater

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Bourbon neat or if not lazy make a martooni with jalapeño stuffed olives, very cold and a touch of Vermou…… not, fuck the Vermouth; just us a small touch of the juice from the olive jar. IMHOTIAR.

Doktor Zymm

Good point, I forgot I could mix drinks. But sadly no olives, I tend to prefer the blue cheese stuffed to the jalapeno stuffed though. I feel sad for people with a genetic predisposition to hate stinky cheese.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The jalapeño stuffed ones will also be back to haunt you the next day. The blue cheese ones actually help my stomach irritation a bit. I like both, but the heat is my preference.

Doktor Zymm

If I want heat, I rim the glass with cayenne

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

One time I did that and later went into the bathroom and when I looked in the mirror it was like a bad impression of the Joker. One must be careful.

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

GIN

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

bottle of… delicious… bourbon. Brownest of the brown liquors… so tempting. [holds the bottle to his ear]
What’s that? You want me to drink you? But I’m in the middle of a trial!

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Spur
Spur

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Why am i seeing ads for some California Proposition on the ballot, apparently meant to kill dialysis patients, here in Texas during the NLCS commercial break?
There would be no ad here, if it meant affecting healthcare in order to make it easier to kill poor people. Hell, there would be no proposition, period.

Doktor Zymm

Because there is a shitton of funding by sketchy for profit dialysis Corps behind the ads for that prop and they cast a wide net

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Their market research folks need to bear down, I can’t even vote absentee in California from San Antonio (or can I?).

Doktor Zymm

Probably? It’s easier to vote in CA than like, any other state

Doktor Zymm

I feel you on the shitty week. The last few haven’t been great, but this one really was awful. Today at least was the least horrible day of the week, and there were actually some good bits, so hopefully I turned a corner and things will get back to normalish. Although, I am now pretty committed to switching groups at work. Once someone you’re supposed to work closely with has been a total asshole to you because you didn’t prioritize a personal favor to them over actual important work that’s your actual job, it’s kinda hard to stick around.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Doktor Zymm

Aw man, I miss Gilligan’s Island reruns

Viva La Tabula Raza
Viva La Tabula Raza

Kaye: You know, you guys were in class trying to list all the “Gilligan’s Island” episodes without even a hint of irony.
Shavonne: What the hell are you talking about, girl?
Kaye: You weren’t thinking about it, were you?
Shavonne: Gilligan’s Island?
Kaye: It’s what’s called a male pornographic fantasy.
Shavonne: Oh my…
Kaye: Think about it. You’re basically alone on a deserted island with two readily available women. One a seductive sex-goddess type, the other a healthy girl-next-door type with a nice butt. So guys have it all, the Madonna and the whore. Women get nothing; we get a geek, an overweight middle-aged guy, some nerdy scientific type, I mean…
Jodi: The professor’s sexy.

Doktor Zymm

The professor is SUPER sexy

Petronel

Damn right he is.

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Spur
Spur

Spur
Spur

Spur
Spur

the weed store closes at 2am. I should go browse. The weather is great right now to smoke outside and listen to some music.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

That reminds me….

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Weed store where? (i.e. California, Colorado, Canada). I think you’re Canadian.

Spur
Spur

Nevada.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Nevada is the new Florida

Sharkbait
Sharkbait

Nevadaman doesn’t have the same cache as Floridaman though

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Congratulations on your American citizenship.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

Hey let’s take a survey: I know some of us are drinking, and some of us are getting high. How many of us are doing the Saturday New York Times crossword puzzle (in ink) on a hooker’s ass while another hooker is pouring top grade cocaine under their eyelids and yet another hooker is licking their freshly waxed nut sack? I’m not saying that’s me but you have no way of telling now, do you?

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

I’m definitely doing two of those things.

Spur
Spur

put me down for waxed nut sack

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Wow; hookers with nut sacks are expensive. I can’t afford that.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Spur
Spur

and that little boy grow up to be Gratliff.

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Spur
Spur

i forgot the company servers are down this Saturday. I knocked out all my planned Saturday work just now. No way am doing shit on Sunday.

let’s drink and root for the NBA Special Undies.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Sharkbait
Sharkbait

I don’t think that membership is active anymore

Spur
Spur

Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

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Spur
Spur

Folks.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

That Milwaukee first baseman doesn’t miss many meals. That guy eats a steak for breakfast every day.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Petronel

Been watching the game on a small screen until before last commercial break.

Now watching on a larger screen, and just noticed that one fan behind home plate seems to be very much on board with the Sexy Friday concept.

(Apologies if this has been already noted here.)

Mr. Ayo
Mr. Ayo

Marlin Man’s escort?

Petronel

Yep. Perhaps Floridian, then? (Should be glad the roof is closed tonight.)