Thank goodness they staggered the two games on offer, huh? And the featured game is between two teams that the majority of football fans would like to have fired into the sun. But let’s think about that for a second. Why would we do that to the good old sun? It was your fault you got burned that day-you forgot to re-apply the sunscreen. And the sun is a job creator. It was the one that originally determined when the tides came in. It gave that task to the moon as soon as it graduated from college. Now look at how the moon is thriving! The sun is a good friend.
TO THE GAMES!
Jags/Titans:
Poor Jacksonville is gonna get bulldozed as though it were a shantytown somewhere in Africa. The head bulldozer goes by the name of Derrick Henry and he has some experience. The Jags give up the most yards per rush in the league and allowed two rb’s (Williams and Mack) to gain 100+ against them last time out. This one is gonna hurt.
Cowboys/Pats:
One has to wonder how New England is going to score, what with both Sanu and Dorsett both out and the running game being the shambles that it is. Even if wonky-kneed Cooper is ineffective Dallas still has Gallup and Zeke and DAK! out there making plays. I just get the feeling that the Pats are going to be exposed today as GrumbleLord begs everyone to not look behind the curtain.
There ya go. Make some words.
The worst part of that Seahawks game is the Eagles didn’t get blown the fuck out of the water. Now if it breaks that the Eagles get the Chawx in the wild card round, every WIP dipshit is gonna talk about how we almost won while pretending Russ didn’t have one of the worst games of his career combined with a few brutal drops.
i have a whole gaggle of Rodgers in San Fran jokes for tonight
So it looks like we’re still set to watch Eagles and Cowboys rock-paper-scissors for the right to get fucking annihilated
yep
Think yous still have an edge on us. We cant catch herpes in an Albanian brothel.
That’s only because in Warsaw Pact brothel, herpes catch YOU!
Welp. I said, in this space, I thought the ne defense wasn’t all that and Cooper and Gallup would have big games. As Ron white would say, “I was wrong”
I hate football
Winnipeg scores!
Only in the summer!!! Winter is dire.
How long was that last second?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AOMBcY6HelE
Should still take a knee, just throw it through end zone on 4th down
FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT
welp back the NFCLeast
What’s the cheat code again?
Left, Right, Up, Down, A, B, Start?
/gets punched
Well it was worth a shot.
B, A, B, A, select, start. For two-player ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Works best when using one’s tongue.
If Garrett had any balls he would beatup the ref who called the flag on Fredrick.
That would have been a catch if Brady had thrown it …
ref gives Belicheat a re-assuring pat on the belly
Give this Dallas roster to anyone else and they are winners.
As I’ve said before, Princeton has enough talent to keep him in that job forever
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sL_mm7_D1wM
that’s game.
Game over. Nice cover princeton boy.
3 timeouts left, if they stop NE, they MAY kick the FG
Oh right, darkest timeline.
Womp womp
I think it’s rather unlikely any of the players are guilty of tripping. Opiates? Sure, absolutely. But I’m pretty sure no one out there is flying on psychedelics, TROY
This is what we get for putting our hopes on the Dallas Cowboys.
what? Dude, i love my team but they are abusive. Stay away
NAWWWWWWWWWWWWT A CATCH
You’ll never get a chance to beat teh Pats if you can’t even get past the mid-boss referees
WTF!!!!!!!!!!! these BS calls
The amount of cop shows on CBS can only be tallied in irrational numbers.
Here comes teh BLEERGH again, falling on our heads liek a memory…
Me on Monday mornings.
LETS GO DALLAS !
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9tjdswqGGVg
One of the best musical sequences in cinema imo
You ain’t wrong.
Alexa, record my conversations while you’re off and send all my data to Amazon
90 yards to victory!
Jaguras lose and meth sales in Duuuuuuuvvvvvvalllllll….well, they stay pretty much the same, really.
A surprisingly bad round of playcalling for hoodie mcdipshit
Gritty drop!
it was a pick play as well
thats not good
Yup. THat’s what he does.
Frank Gore’s neck is ridiculous. They should just slap a Juggernaut helmet on him.
Drink mine, fine, I’m going to drink yours
Aikman hates Garrett
There’s that Ivy League bravery.
Dak should have ran on 2nd down
ROUGE!!!!!!
A rouge!!!
You at the game?
Nope, got back from Mexico last night and still have the shakes.
Wouldn’t the shakes keep you warm? Lol
Oh god dammit! I get up for one second and I miss the one play I wanted to see.
I’m surprised the refs didn’t penalize the receiver with illegal forward pass.
Now for the weekly Jason Garret Gets Too Cute sequence
Well, Princeton did beat Penn yesterday…
Boola boola!!
COBBBOMB
Which will result a missed field goal try.
TD and missed extra point even more likely.
The coaching disparity in this fucking game.
Derrick Henry has 28 FF points and counting.
Which means I now really do have to kill Game Time Decision.
He is a tall drink of water
Derrick Henry or GTD?
GTD
Haha.