INT. DFO PRODUCTION OFFICE – DAY
A pair of sleazy Hollywood producers are lounging around in an office, reading over a marketing report.
DARKEST TIMELINE ZACK MORRIS: …and so what’s this bit about banana cake?
RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: Oh, that’s kind of a buzzword right now among fútbol fans.
DTZM: Football doesn’t start for another two months.
RTD: No, fut-bol. Like “boot”.
DTZM: Oh, you mean like Canadian football.
RTD: No, soccer. But speaking of Canadia, they just had a big holiday yesterday and all their churches are catching on fire, maybe it would be a nice gesture to dedicate this week’s Request Line to them.
DTZM: A three hour playlist of nothing but Rush and Bryan Adams? No thank you. But you know, there’s another country that’s got a big weekend coming up, you might remember them from a little something called “The Revolutionary War”…
RTD: Of, of course! I even have the perfect host in mind, we were going to call him about starring in that period piece set in the rural Midwest.
DTZM: The My Antonia adaptation?
RTD: Stop calling it that, we don’t have the rights. You wanna get sued?
RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY pulls out his cellphone, then punches numbers into the speakerphone.
— [speakerphone flies open] —
JASON STATHAM: OY! WOT’S ALL THIS, THEN?
RTD: Jason, baby, it’s Rikki-Tikki-Deadly, with DFO Productions. What’s my favorite action movie star up to?
JASON STATHAM: I’M WATCHIN’ THE FOOTY, INNIT?
RTD: [aside, to DTZM] The Euro soccer tournament is happening right now. [to STATHAM] IT’S COMIN’ HOME, INNIT?
JASON STATHAM: IT’S COMIN’ HOME!
RTD: [shouting] IT’S COMIN’ HOME!
JASON STATHAM: IT’S COMIN’ HOME, INNIT? WHAT DO YOU [REDACTEDS] WANT?
RTD: Jason, it’s a big weekend for England, what with Wimbledon and England’s big game against Ukraine tomorrow. We thought we’d dedicate this week’s edition of Request Line to England and were hoping you could get things started.
JASON STATHAM: OY! RIGHT! I GOT A SONG FOR YA, INNIT? [to the tune of “doo dah”] ♫ POSH SPICE TAKES IT UP THE…♫
DTZM: [interrupting] Actually, we were looking for songs that specifically about the country of England.
JASON STATHAM: LIKE, THE QUEEN AND ALL THAT?
DTZM: Quite, quite.
JASON STATHAM: “Quite”? HE SOUNDS LIKE ONE OF THEM POSH FUCKERS, INNIT?
RTD: OY! RIGHT!
JASON STATHAM: OW’S ABOUT SOME OLD BILLY BRAGG?
RTD: OY! CRACKING! SIRI, YOU RIGHT [REDACTED], PLAY “A NEW ENGLAND” BY BILLY BRAGG
Today’s theme is “England”. We’re looking for songs specifically about the country of England and its people (including its leadership). Have at it!
Bit o’ Toad in the Hole, then.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zl5EzH8FfIU
& one more from Ian.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kaHQQsm6LT0
/Phone Rings in the DFO Clubhouse:
//Horatio picks up the phone
H’llo
Collect Ouija-Board call from tWBS, will you accept the charges?
Horatio: (thinking) Well, I know Green Day isn’t British, so how bad could it be? (out loud) Yeah, sure what the hell.
tWBS: Hey man, love to tell you all about the Afterlife but first could you play Garbage?
Horatio: Probably inevitable given it’s your musical draft choice.
tWBS: Har-de-har-har funny guy. Think you’ll like Hell? Anyway, I meant Garbage the band. Shirley Manson’s in it, and it always rains in England, so it fits.
Horatio: Sure, man, I’ll put it in. Hey! What was that about Hell!?
tWBS: -click-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cj20VhQ5oas
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vEHbmwmRPoU
Back to Liverpool…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=08083BNaYcA
Doesn’t get more English than a band from England using Western music to create violence in Asia.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pSF0p3i_hkE
Thruppence and sixpence
https://youtu.be/TmfQQC1bsf4
& the L@L version. Jolly good show!!
London is even in the first line!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J1yA1Kq3uvk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hplHXmga6zE
As a kid I hated The Beatles but loved ELO. So dumb that I couldn’t figure out the former’s overwhelming influence on the latter.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Up4WjdabA2c&ab_channel=ELOVEVO
I think I had every single ELO 8-track release between Eldorado through Discovery. What the fuck was that Xanadu shit, though? They lost me there. Did not forgive Jeff Lynne for a few years, at least until Wilburys.
I couldn’t figure out the latter’s overwhelming influence on the former
I’d have thought it was the other way around?
I fixed it just now.
Not a song, but very much about England (Church of)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVH0gZO5lq0
Eddie Izzard iz always appropriate!
A little Cromwell would be cromulent
https://youtu.be/LrjHz5hrupA
I spent a weekend at a buddy’s home in St Ives, the one where Cromwell was born. Those old timey towns are so cool.
Did you meet a man with 7 wives?
No but my buddy had 7 varieties of single malt on hand. Probably even more…
Since Scotchy took ‘London Calling’ early, deservedly so, I will look elsewhere
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=96UtZPLiT90
Apparently this was a tribute to John Lennon
https://youtu.be/ejw_LOi-nhk
Now that is fucking awesome. Never heard of.
What can a poor boy do?
https://youtu.be/BUt0dZXPFoU
Nitpicking asshole says: That song was about the riots in Paris in summer 1968.
He is from sleepy London town, which is no place for a street fighting man. He went to Paris to raise a ruckus!
Point conceded.
I’ve been told that Liverpool was London-adjacent. Love the langourness (not a word-yet!) that informs this tune.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zj7OJeyhq2Q&ab_channel=TheBanglesVEVO
Dammit, good pull.
Originally by Katrina and the Waves
Let’s pretend Echo Beach is somewhere in England. (I drove my fellow basketball teammates crazy by repeating the refrain at the end of this tune over and over and over again-THAT WAS THE POINT!)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpqDTQOFvf0&ab_channel=EmiRecordsItaly
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPHGJoWqVe4
Cool band, until they lost their magical abilities and drowned in sunshine.
I just logged in here to play this song, get outta mahead!
For many years, Egypt was part of the British Empire.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cv6tuzHUuuk
Two pages already? I’m not scrolling through all that; I’ll just Blair Witch this shit.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qbmWs6Jf5dc
I don’t think anyone posted God Save the Queen, either.
Edit: I was wrong about God Save the Queen. it was done very early.
That was the 1st post..
I think I’m justified in calling the 1st post “very early.”
Just have to stay away from The Kinks discography. It’s like dynamiting fish at the base of the dam.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xRUE0aAI5o8
Shall we joomp across the Oirish Sea for a moment?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8MuhFxaT7zo
(to whoever it was in the last post) no, THIS is Madness
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oW_0CM6CgCM&ab_channel=sid3231
Busking in London
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFsCbTZ7eLc
No offense, but I would maim every one of you to have Sinatra’s voice (I mean from when he was alive, not now)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hTsUwmXavk&ab_channel=Deuk
Didja ever read “The Godfather” (with the stuff about Johnny Fontaine / Frank Sinatra’s vocal chord surgery)? Kinda interesting.
Have not read that. Will endeavour to do that, thanks for the rec,
Yeah, apparently ‘ol blue eyes didn’t take to some of the things that “Johnny Fontaine” did, and publicly berated Puzo.. Heh heh…
Anyway, lots of fun stuff in the book that didn’t make it into the film.
I read Puzo’s books. He’s a bit of a hack, though I did find the novels entertaining. I remember the three-word book review of “Fools Die” in Rolling Stone: “And fools buy.”
Yeah, I tried reading one of his other books (Omerta, I think). Got about 30 pages in and put it right back down… Liked The Godfather though. Prolly because I liked the film so much..
Well, that and the bits about Lucy Mancini’s ridiculously cavernous vagina. That was kinda interesting…
London high society…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xBGSlnTino
Speaking of Elvis Costello…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_x_bSUqpfA
Did Simply Red tie together Reagan and Thatcher’s assault on the poor in a song? Yeah, they did.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DrUB0g8Vjgg&ab_channel=SimplyRed
Also,
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HVGg_5grOTg
London refugee scene
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DCL1RpgYxRM
Joe Jackson is great. The music guy, not Michael’s abusive dad.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNoOLCsqNTE&ab_channel=JoeJacksonVEVO
He sure didn’t fit the mold of his era’s pop/rock stars. Same vibe as Elvis Costello, at least for me…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6EJxYNQxvw
something something Blair Witch
Missed it’s previous posting during my original scroll-through. Happens sometimes.
So nice, you played it twice!
Should have posted it eight times, to match the song title.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=geaWf4qLON8