As most of you know, Request Line is an offseason feature, to help us outlast the drudgery that takes place from February through August. Once in a blue moon, however, there comes such a day that demands a special edition.
Today is one of such days.
I’ve been tracking the deaths of prominent antivaxxers (and some not-so-prominent ones as well). The grandfather of them all was Herman Cain, who scoffed at the dangers of coronavirus to enjoy a (sparsely) attended political rally in Tulsa. He caught coronavirus, went on a ventilator, and died. Didn’t stop tweeting that the virus wasn’t dangerous, though. Local activist Laura Zuern served as the inspiration for the Weekend at Zuernie’s series. Dick Farrel, Phil Valentine and Marc Bernier get to shake hands with their idol Rush Limbaugh now. Q-Anon proponent Veronica Wolski now has a pair of eyes in the sky of her very own. And this brings us to second-tier radio host Bob Enyart.
Bob catapulted to almost-fame by reading the obituaries of gay men who had died from AIDS to the soundtrack of Queen’s “Another One Bites the Dust”. People like Bob Enyart were the reason I developed homophobic attitudes when I was young. Modeling the behavior of bigots like him led me to do and say things in my adolescence that still bring me great shame to this very day. Later, Bob was charged and convicted of child abuse. He called for women who had abortions to face the death penalty. Most recently, Bob called for people to refuse vaccination shots because he claimed the vaccines were tested on the cells of aborted fetuses. He sued the state of Colorado over coronavirus-related restrictions on church attendance. Despite being unvaccinated, Bob Enyart trusted his God and his unprepared immune system to protect him from the most dangerous virus the world has seen in over a hundred years, and blithely engaged in many activities that would be considered “dangerous” for an aging, overweight, goatee-wearing individual such as himself.
So what’s Bob Enyart up to now?
Tell ’em, boys:
Today’s Request Line is dedicated to the willfully unvaccinated members of our society. You’re encouraged to post songs to celebrate their obstinacy, their stupidity, their embrace of quack cures, and their abject refusal to engage in practices that will make life safer for their fellow members of society should those practices cause them even the slightest bit of inconvenience. These songs go out to the willfully unvaccinated who have died, are dying, or will die.
So long, Bob. You spent your life selling hatred, and given that your widow or the children you beat haven’t put up a Gofundme page begging for pennies to defray your burial expenses, it seems like you made a pretty good living at it. Rot in hell for all eternity, you irredeemable piece of shit.
Idiot Wind is what he could no longer get in and out of his lungs at the end, amirite
https://youtu.be/Ex05XUddWMk
Get what you give is close enough to reap what you sow
https://youtu.be/DL7-CKirWZE
I just saw on Twitter that “Norm Macdonald” is “Trending with: Turd Ferguson,” and I literally laughed out loud.
This is about nuclear destruction, but let’s pretend it’s a MAGA rally.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=frAEmhqdLFs&ab_channel=TheTomLehrerWisdomChannel
[is the reason those two things aren’t one and the same] – General Milley
Where this guy’s going, Biohazard will be played on the jukebox THE WHOLE TIME.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZYfwoWM2uCc
You know how some rappers, you look at em and go, eh they’re probably soft as hell (Vanilla Ice for one)? This is not the case with Onyx.
They’re as hard as, um, some kind of rock. Obsidian, I guess?
Yes, can’t think of any other black rock. OH WAIT Living Colour.
THIS GUY JOLIE JAKE DELHOMME I CALL HIM BOB ENYART CAUSE HE HAS CHECKED OUT AND IS HEADED FOR A BETTER PLACE.
(Bob Enyart is decidedly NOT headed for a better place)
I was debating saying “is convinced they’re headed for a better place” but I didn’t want to saddle Joliet Jake with any doubts, because I’m confident he’s made the right decision.
Fox News, OANN, Newsmax…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmWpX9Q1fCc&ab_channel=Primus-Topic
A bit on the nose, but still
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ee_uujKuJMI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPyPT7fb0-Q&ab_channel=RobertPlant
DOUBLE SHOT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6iZ49s7eH5g
Good luck (not really) with your attempt to
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRwtAQ1i8cU&ab_channel=DepecheMode-Topic
What you should have done when you felt that first tickle of a cough in your throat, instead of going to your unvaccinated aunt’s birthday party along with all your other god-fearing unvaccinated relatives.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uzWxXy1HICM
I don’t know if sending him a dick pic was the right thing to do, but I’m glad your effort was successful.
“Wish I coulda seen it.”
D. Favre
&ct=g
This is my favorite spam email I’ve ever received:
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Money gratification: $4,000 a 1 month.
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Ya’ll shall not be constrained to transact with heavy-weight packages. Mainly, you’ll find dress or baubles inside the consignments. Training is supplied without payment from your side. Everything you all demand to be employed by our biz is a PC, access to the online net, and printer to be capable of printing papers. How much money thou will receive relies upon exceptionally on you all – the more time ya’ll function, the larger you all obtain. On average, folks which just launch functioning for our community receive near 1000 dollars per week.
Are you interested in our suggestion? Then feel free to give a letter to our team via online mail. And remember about staying at apartment from 9.00 to 5 o’clock PM is a must to be able to be employed to the mentioned position (in another case, the post is not for ya’ll, unluckily).
It’s impossible to read this without imagining some kind of thick accent.
You will be unsurprised to learn that the email came from “Marko Draganovski.”
QAnonUEENS of the Stone Age
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHDaKtx6bGY
Wonder if this dude is vaccinated or relying on his immune system and prayer warriors?
https://twitter.com/Smiling_Trina/status/1437790905700864006?s=20
I guess it’s good he was removed, but how the hell did he get in and set up like this to begin with?
https://twitter.com/LACountyRRCC/status/1437819204107862016?s=20
It’s West Hollywood. He’s a pole worker all right.
I worked at the polls in 2020 – did exactly what he’s doing. I’m trying to think of what I could do to fuck with the process, and there’s not a whole lot. The only thing I could think of that wouldn’t immediately get spotted by the voting site lead would be to have people sign in and vote as someone other than themselves. But unless it was super busy you wouldn’t even have much luck with that – either the voter would notice (you have to sign something) or the poll worker next to you would get wise pretty quickly.
Its the
that really sticks out to me. He was told and he said “fuck all y’all” and it took a tweet to get him tossed.
I’m thinking of our site manager and while I have no doubt she would have dealt with it appropriately, it’s not like she’s have taken a pipe wrench to his head and dragged his corpse out in fifteen seconds. It would have taken a little while; certainly long enough for some busybody to snap a photo like this and get themselves fifteen minutes of fame.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yz_WS4cnHcI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qKYQNtF11eg
How great is this song?
The answer is: Really fucking great.
All the Ivermectin fans in the house say HEEEEYYYY!!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_DVS_303kQ
Plus this song is good for tucking.
My reaction every time one of these assholes gets Rod and Todded:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsaTElBljOE
https://twitter.com/NICKIMINAJ/status/1437532566945341441
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xPlqLHcphyw
“I ain’t ascairt o’ no China virus gettin’ me an my kin!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MBiOETwfbaI
Norm Macdonald died today. That sucks.
Scammers, thieves, and con artists? Sounds like:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=24mqb-IAHfo
Once these shitstains inevitably get sick, they always cry out for “Prayer Warriors” to come wish for them to survive. From I’ve seen so far the Prayer Warriors are the celestial equivalent of a team coached by Hue Jackson.
What it’s like to be on a vent:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WM8bTdBs-cw
Oh good, it’s time for you to get off the vent!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eeqGuaAl6Ic
“Hydrochloroquine/Ivermecting/Zinc is a miracle cure that will make this all go away!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exnHAdopRxA
https://youtu.be/VMCrXYz4HDE
Every bitter night into an empty room I plead my case
Every night I pray that in the morning when I wake
I’ll be in a familiar place and find that I’m recovered and I’m sane
And I’ll remember everything
I’ll remember what I was like before that bug bit me
“Your girlfriend trusted her immune system more than she trusted Dr. Fauci, eh?”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wy8mEOhSk0s
DOUBLE SHOT!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SDHr4tZSVfA
I’m glad Enyart lived long enough to see Carl Nassib come out as gay. I’m sorry (not sorry) the didn’t live long enough to a gay player in the NFL do THIS:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOnxFtpsscQ
Tell ’em, Rev. Gary Davis.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PXPh7EbB1Tw&ab_channel=Shroomeryslearyfan
Smell ya later, Bob. Smell ya later forever.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=09LTT0xwdfw
Here’s a great one from Gumby
https://youtu.be/Ve3fcInpKj0
“Experimental Use Authorization? I’ll take my chances with the virus, thank you very much.”
So weird this won’t embed. It’s “Dare to Be Stupid”.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SMhwddNQSWQ
.https://youtu.be/x5SYjoZsLQE
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cbCf6YcMxEk
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SoxTSRV6XSc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JoolQUDWq-k
I think it’s only fitting to Blair Witch this for him, now that he’s been Rod and Todded
https://youtu.be/rY0WxgSXdEE
I don’t know if I posted this one before but it has been heavily rewritten, and I like it:
************
Here’s another submarine story. I hope these don’t bore you.
This is the “hall of mirrors” story.
We were a “northern boat” trained and designed to operate in the upper North Atlantic and Arctic Oceans.
Sometimes our boat would have ice in it, but that’s a different story.
So on our 40 day patrol we would leave King’s Bay Georgia and hit our dive point and head north. That’s where we wanted to be.
The Gulf Stream is a very warm ocean current that flows up the Atlantic seaboard all the way to England. The Labrador current flows south from Canada and is ice cold, and the two currents meet off of Newfoundland, where my mother is from, and the two currents would swirl together.
But this is the “sweet spot” for a submarine. This is the hall of mirrors.
We were being tracked by five different navies, and we could outsmart every single one of them.
Surface ships could only track us by sound, primarily engine noise. So we would get in the Labrador/Gulf mix (warm and cold) and all underwater sound waves went haywire, to our advantage.
In the “hall of mirrors” the sound would be deflected (or “bent”) due to drastic temperature and salinity changes and interfaces. We constantly measured this, and we could find all the favorable inversions due to the small sensors we were constantly and quietly firing out.
Acoustically, to the surface ships, nothing was what it seemed to be.
Can you hear us? Do you think we are over here? No, we’re actually over there.
The sound would bend, just like in a hall of mirrors. They never knew where we were.
Meanwhile, we are downstairs drinking coffee and watching movies. We knew what we were doing.
But we knew where they were, and believe you me we were locked on to them with our 48s (Mk 48 torpedoes).
For those tech-obsessed freaks who insisted that the vaccine was full of 5G microchips – check out this fancy new gadget that’s going to do your breathing for you now that your lungs are full of fluid!
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Dy41wKWvL74
This is an excellent choice
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xKl71SMVjxY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFFtu_beQP0
Buh-bye!
https://youtu.be/Qy9_lfjQopU
This song is sort of where I got the title for the post. All those fucking pious prayer warriors thinking everything is God’s will but sometimes, if you wish hard enough, he’ll call an audible.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=xxTCx-yGM8g
Hey Anti-vaxxers:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=th4Czv1j3F8
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XcAl93uEYUA
Let’s make this a DOUBLE SHOT! The latest craze among antivaxers is, which is basically iodine. Iodine is chemically similary to chlorine (they’re both halides, thank you four years of chemistry education) which means that they are generally pretty good as a disinfectant. Like bleach, though, iodine is pretty good at killing *everything* which means it’s deadly if you ingest enough of it. So it’s basically…
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Qq4j1LtCdww
Did someone say DOUBLE SHOT of poison?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgnhVcyLy1I