Monday Morning Mock Draft: Shall We Play A Game?

It’s well nigh 11:30 pm as I write this. I was just finishing off some Fortnite quests, (no, you’re a loser), when I realized that tomorrow is Monday and a) I have to start the work week again, (because I do not live in Illinois and did not win the $1.2 billion MegaMillions lottery), and b) I hadn’t bothered to do the mock draft yet, instead focusing on putting up a bat house in the backyard, watering our increasingly desperate landscaping, buying beer, procuring BBQ for dinner, and apparently fomenting a plan to writ a paragraph consisting solely of one run-on sentence after a very short one telling you all what time I came up with this nonsense.

Boy are my arms tired!

Anyhoo, while finishing the last quest I ran through some ideas. I have a couple left over from Scotchy and RTD, but running them without giving the originator more than a night’s heads up to get the first pick in seems shitty. I thought briefly of “spices”, but figured most of us would run out after “salt” and “pepper”, while Yeah Right and 2-3 others would just run train on everyone.

But if people think spices would work, let me know. I will take pepper with the first pick.

Pepper rules.

Then I realized that I was playing a video game, and that I was running this draft for a bunch of shut-in nerds, (and to quote ‘Mall Rats’ “I should know; we can smell our own”), and frankly a draft for video games is probably long overdue.

The rules are simple: If it’s a game, and it had a video component, you can choose it. Arcade, Atari, PC, whatever. It must have a video component, however. If a game is part of a series, please specify which of the series you are taking; the others remain on the table. If there are games within games, you can also take specific games while leaving the others alone; a good example of this would be the various Zombie games in the Call of Duty games.

Your Commissioner is the tough but…no, actually he’s pretty much just tough.

Quite honestly Halo’s Master Chief is probably a complete psychotic in desperate need of intervention, which he is never going to get because the Universe needs him more than he needs his sanity. I’m sure everything will be just fine. Hopefully being the featured image soothes some of that PTSD.

With the first pick I am taking the zombies game from Call of Duty, (heh, “duty”), 3, ‘Shadows of Evil.’ It had a great map, large and complicated, and was so much better to play as a group than solo that it required getting together remotely with 3 friends, or making 3 new friends when you got in a random game and realized that everyone was pretty good and you had a shot at the insanely complicated Easter egg. The story was great too, and the noir graphics I thought top notch.

With that, the rest of you are on the clock. Don’t disappoint me, nerds.

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ballsofsteelandfury

Last pick:

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TheRevanchist

For my final pick, I’m going Star Wars: Knights of The Old Republic 2: The Sith Lords. Great game with one of the all time great characters in a game in Kreia. Her dialogue and the voice actor Sara Kestelman are perfection.

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Gumbygirl

We had the Turbo Grafx- 16 system that was mad cool. The best games were the golf game and this one. The Legendary Axe!

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BeefReeferLives

Oops. Didn’t see “My Dinner With Andre” Gotta include that action packed classic.

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BC Dick

I remember really enjoying Day of the Tentacle. Elementary school abouts, I think.

https://images.app.goo.gl/vBaEp5c8TVGtX35M8

Forgot how pictures work here

Last edited 2 years ago by BC Dick
Wakezilla

I’ll take Command and Conquer: Red Alert for a lofty steal. It also has one of the best theme songs ever

https://youtu.be/3HUWUtTZvK4

BeefReeferLives

Last one: Lunar Lander (this one drove me nuts)

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Was expecting Balls to take it but I’ll close out my draft with Leisure Suit Larry

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ballsofsteelandfury

I never played it.

WCS

3rd and 30? NFL BLITZ!
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BugEyedBoo
BeefReeferLives

Keeping it old school: Flight Simulator

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Sharkbait

I’ll take MSFS 2020 then.

Sure, it’s a naked flex for what Azure can do, but it’s pretty damn fun.

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ArmedandHammered

Age of Empires

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Um, how is NBA Jam still on the board? YOINK

HE’S ON FIRE!

https://youtu.be/5mf98dAnQ88

Sharkbait

A shame on all of our houses

Game Time Decision

Manic Mansion for the C64

And surprised that no one has taken Leisure Suit Larry yet. Lol

Redshirt

Idle Miner. Actually I’m playing it right now.

Sharkbait

Just gonna drop this link here for reasons:

https://www.myabandonware.com/

Game Time Decision

Somewhere I have an emulator and a bunch of the original ROMS for most of the arcade games from back in my day.

BugEyedBoo

I set this up: https://retropie.org.uk/ , but it turns out I’m the only one in my house that likes 35-year-old video games. Go fig.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

5. I need an arcade game so I’ll go with my all-time favorite:

https://doorfliesopen.com/2016/11/30/you-gotta-unleash-the-dragons-lair/

LemonJello

5th Pick! One I play on my phone daily:

Marvel Strike Force

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yeah right

GTA San Andreas still here?

OK then. I played that fucker for 10 straight months – not constantly I have work and life shit to do.

One of my favorite games ever.

I will never retake that fucking flight school again though.

Last edited 2 years ago by yeah right
WCS

That and flying the RC planes are the reasons I never restarted it after the Xbox broke.

TheRevanchist

That was such a good game. After my first hour of playing, I just walked around like a badass saying all the 4 letter words. So fun!

BugEyedBoo

No MMORPG love?

Wrath of the Lich King is pretty good, but BC is WoW at its best.

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Game Time Decision

Clash of Clans

Yes I’m still playing.

Sharkbait

Surprised this lasted this long

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yeah right

“Time to Kill” was fucking dynamite. I LOVED that game.

BugEyedBoo

I can’t believe Diablo got this far.

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Sharkbait

The GOAT city simulator

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WCS

Reticulated splines…

Redshirt

The time I spent playing this game will come in handy when I finish my Disaster Machine.

WCS

Does it resemble a giant, single eye on a four-legged chassis?

Redshirt

Uh no.

(Mental Note: WCS knows too much.)

BeefReeferLives

Gag pick: E.T. for the Atari 2600 – The video game so crappy, they buried it in the fucking desert.

https://money.cnn.com/2015/09/01/technology/atari-et/index.html

Last edited 2 years ago by BeefReeferLives
BeefReeferLives

The OG “Global Thermonuclear War” game- Missle Command. The arcade one with the big assed trackball.
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Last edited 2 years ago by BeefReeferLives
BugEyedBoo

Never got better than fair at that.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That game wasn’t fun to play. It was just horrifying and stressful.

Brick Meathook

Zero Wing

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ArmedandHammered

The 3D wire frame Star Wars game. I could’ve put myself through college (community) with all the money I put into that game.

ArmedandHammered

From Wikipedia:

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BugEyedBoo

There was an arcade right next to campus that had a sit-down version of that. They also had 8 tokens for a dollar afternoon happy hour. Fun times.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I had that on my board. I will go to my grave arguing that the Death Star explosion sequence in that game was much better than anything in any of the movies.

Redshirt

Banjo-Kazooie. On top of good graphics and humor, it even had the audacity to have a Pop Quiz as part of the boss battle.

BeefReeferLives

Battlezone. comment image

WCS

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LemonJello

4th Pick: Spy Hunter

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BeefReeferLives

Loved the arcade version. Once I washed some no doze down with jolt cola and played it for close to an hour on 1 quarter.

Fronkenshteen

Tapper. Always brought quarters when picking up pizza at Pellegrini’s so I could get in a couple of games.
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ballsofsteelandfury

Can’t believe this hasn’t been picked yet:

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Last edited 2 years ago by ballsofsteelandfury
Redshirt

I’ll set aside my next pick because Sharkbait’s Mario Party reminded me of another:

Super Smash Bros.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Tremendous value

Brick Meathook

Lee Carvallo’s Putting Challenge:

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Sharkbait

Mario Party. Any of them. The party game that brings out the absolute worst in people.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Really? We used to go out on the town in San Diego and come back hammered and play that and have a blast. I don’t remember any hard feelings coming out.

yeah right

Myst for PC. For a minimalist game it was difficult and creepy as hell.

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WCS

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Zelda II: The Adventure of Link

Fitting that the “black sheep” of the Zelda franchise is the personal favorite of the “black sheep” of WCS’ parents.

To Redshirt: I knew this one would last for a while, so I waited. That said, kind of amazing you broke the Zelda seal this late.

Redshirt

Work held me up. If I had the day off, I’d be owning this draft!

Also, good pick. Personally, I’m disappointed we haven’t had a remake of this one. With 2.5D graphics, it would be amazing.

Last edited 2 years ago by Redshirt
blaxabbath

I took Wind Waker in the first.

Redshirt

Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past

Also, how are all Zelda games still on the board?

Game Time Decision

Original Windows FlavoUr Mine Sweeper
Yes I know it was a traing thing designed to look like a game, but twas still fun
Edit: I can’t fucking spel

Last edited 2 years ago by Game Time Decision
BeefReeferLives

Typo or not? There is a video game called “MindSweeper” https://store.steampowered.com/app/1933580/MindSweeper/

Game Time Decision

Typo. Mine Sweeper

BeefReeferLives

Figured, as you said original windows.

Pictured – Mindsweeper:

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WCS

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BeefReeferLives

Choplifter. comment image

Game Time Decision

I had that for the Commadore 64. On cartridge

BeefReeferLives

Good times. I played it on my Vic-20. One of the few games on the Vic-20 that was any good.

blaxabbath

May we also revisit the Robert Kraft SLAVE hand job matter as well then?

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Game Time Decision

God I hope so
But not Going to happen

Game Time Decision

Mario Cart for the Wii

We break it out every Christmas break and race

blaxabbath

It’s a different game.comment image

LemonJello

Goddamn work getting in the way of my mock drafting time.

3rd Pick: Gauntlet

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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gauntlet_(1985_video_game)

Last edited 2 years ago by LemonJello
BeefReeferLives

Going with good ol’ Atari 2600 Combat! (if I had to pick one of the games within, I would pick the tank one with the bouncing bullets)

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WCS

Quite possibly the most violent video game of all-time:
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Rockstar knew what they were doing.

Also, Buddy bought bought this immediately, and was extremely disappointed.

Last edited 2 years ago by WCS
blaxabbath

Call of Duty Black Ops.

Commercials were as good as the multi-player gameplay.

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Brick Meathook

NHLPA Hockey ’93

“You can make Gretzky’s head bleed!”

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blaxabbath

I had a waffle craving this morning. I never have this kind of stuff for breakfast but it’s humid, hot, and I had a good week of workouts culminating in a sound leg day yesterday that’s just starting to get sore this morning.

It just arrived.

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Gumbygirl

With bacon, because you are not a fucking savage!

BugEyedBoo

There’s a place in town that makes homemade donuts, and pancakes out of their donut batter.

ArmedandHammered

I just imagined pancakes made from the Krispy Kreme doughnut batter….