Your Very Regular NFL Football Open Thread

Vegas. Germany. So many jokes to be made but now we get the usual offerings. The teams on bye are the Broncos, Lions, Jags and Niners. Three of the four have playable tight ends in fantasy. Who are you streaming?

To The Games!

Seahawks/Ravens:

Lamar! continues to improve as a player-while under pressure he has the highest yards per attempt the second-best completion percentage. Those numbers will come in handy vs the Seattle D. More of Charbonnet? He turned 5 carries into 53 yards last week and frankly, last year’s darling-Geno-needs all the help he can get. Zone ‘Em Up! Baltimore’s D has surrendered 0 TD’s and has 2 picked tosses while playing that look.

Cards/Browns:

Since LaPorta, Kittles and Engram are on bye, you may want to look at McBride. Yeah, he’s got deer in the headlights qb Clayton Tune under center but if he does get a pass off it’ll be a short one to a big target. Gotta feeling you’ll see Kyler because Tune vs this Browns D should create a cacophony of turnovers. No Chubb, no problem-since the bye Cleveland has produced an average of 155 yards rushing per tilt.

Bucs/Texans:

Tampa loves to blitz and that’s a problem for rook qb’s unless your name is Stroud. Hs passer rating of 117 when pressure occurs is 4th-best. Also in Stroud’s favor is that the Bucs D gives up a ton of passing yards so have a whirl with Nico and Tank.

Bears/Saints:

Does a Bears fantasy defense shit the bed? Oh yes, they’ve given up the 3rd-most fantasy points to qb’s so far. Shaheed went bananas on my bench last week so do I chase those points? Can’t. Had to throw him on waivers because of injuries and byes-curse you Freezer Vodka short bench!

Vikes/Falcons:

Ho hum. Another week and another Day Three rookie qb is fed to the wolves. Despite the Dobbs trade Minny will start Jaren Hall. Not good for football fans or the league, I think. The Vikes will likely try to establish the run but the Falcons are the very best at stopping designed runs. Sharpen your wheels, Jaren.

Rams/Packers:

Is Fatt Matt gonna risk further injury to his thumb? The gamer in him says, “Yes”. He’d best hand off to the surprising Royce Freeman, a guy that hung around waiting for his chance and took advantage of it. AOC gets the start on the other side-can he get The Squad moving in a progressive fashion? He doesn’t strike me as a mobile guy, what with getting sacked 7 times by the Chargers the first week of October.

Commies/Pats:

Who’s going to watch this slopfest? The Pats are boring as hell and Washington’s D was giving up 28.5 ppg before they traded away Sweat and Young. Could they have been the problem? Well Mac, here’s your chance at turning around your moribund season. Aw crap, I’ll be watching because I’m streaming Howell. Damn. He does love going downfield so maybe he can hit on a few bombs.