Your Dueling NFL Football Tilts Open Thread

Well, lookee here! They’re not the best games but at least we have a choice. (unless one is being hosted on the Alabama Outdoor Network or some other weird spot in the U.S.) I’m not going to look an early Christmas present in the mouth though.

Fallout:

-Everyone wants to make a point about Patty and Andy’s post-game interviews throwing the refs under the bus but the choice was that or throwing Toney there and I saw the wagons get circled. I don’t really care about Andy’s position that much but I think Mahomes is for the most part a standup guy that will most likely back down from his take. I’d also like to point out that Toney is a cancer but we have a bit of history there so I’ll shut it.

-They Shoot QB’s, Don’t They?: More guys go down again this week. Herbert may be playing some 8th dimensional chess, getting injured, likely missing a few games and ensuring that Staley gets fired.

-That Voodoo You Do: In case you were doubting Tomlin’s esoteric beliefs and their effect on the world/standings, the Steelers edged back into a playoff spot by not playing. That is one hell of a Bitch’s Brew our friend has concocted. He did get an assist from losses by the Texans and Colts.

-It’s not time to panic just yet but don’t tell that to an Eagles fan that has seen his team lose in the last two weeks by a combined score of 75-32. The league hasn’t “figured them out”, they just need to re-set and clean up some sloppy play.

to The Games!

Packers/Giants:

-“Tommy Cutlet” is going to weave some more magic and the whole of Jersey’s Italian community is behind him. I won’t be surprised if he ends up on the injury report, the first player ever to be listed as having “severely pinched cheeks”, after all, he’s such a good boy!

-Green Bay’s O currently ranks 17th but not over the last four weeks or so. It’s kinda weird that they’ve put up points in a fairly narrow range-20, 23, 23, 29 and 27.

-“Rashan Gary Eat Tonight!”: He’s leading the team in sacks and the Giants have given up 69 so far. DeVito’s pocket awareness is a work in progress and I think his understanding of the speed of the game needs some catching up as well.

-The Giants have a shot if they can continue gathering INT’s-although eight in the last three fixtures seems an anomaly to me.

Titans/Fins:

-King Henry does well in prime time games-he averages 94.7 under the limelight.

-Tyreek’s receiving prop tonight is an otherworldly 105.5! Has there ever been a higher one? I snickered when he said he was shooting for 2,000. I may have been the silly one. Oh, by the way, the Titans are dead last defending outside receivers.

-Achane’s running prop sits at a mere 56.5. When he touches the ball more than two times he averages 73 yards.

Bring it.

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Mr. Ayo

A late, but month long contribution not in any way associated with Sexy Friday.

Boobie Advent Calendar.

https://boobychristmas.com/

2Pack

Doing gawds work…

Gumbygirl

.

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Gumbygirl

Click on it. It’s a Victorian stereopticon gif.

Gumbygirl

Stereoscopic.

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Mr. Ayo

I was stereoscopic once. Then I sobered up and learned I was not victorious or victorian. Or a gif. Or stereopticon. Hmm, it appears I’m mostly not things.

Nonetheless, I clicked, therefore I am.

Mr. Ayo

Day #11

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Doktor Zymm

THESE TITANS I CALL THEM THE OCEANGATE TITAN BECAUSE THEY IMPLODED THEN IMMEDIATELY EXPLODED TAKING OUT A GROUP OF ELITES ON THE WAY

Horatio Cornblower

Will Levis is frigging jacked.

WCS

LOLphins are back.

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Doktor Zymm

Fry those plantaincakes and slather em in some shitty Tennessee bourbon!

fleshwound_NPG

dont trust a single soul in this league this year

Recovery Whiskey

Call Greenpeace, they slaughtered a bunch of Dolphins

King Hippo

They won it! FOAR Stonehouse’s plant leg!!

Gumbygirl

Wakezilla must be pooping his pants right now.

SonOfSpam

Sad poop.

fleshwound_NPG

dickcatch?

Doktor Zymm

I think this is plantaincakes or something

WCS

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Mr. Ayo

Doktor Zymm

Knee catch? Sure

Recovery Whiskey

Now that DeVito and the Jersey Boys won I can get back to watching Tennessee and their Japanese fishing fleet slaughtering Dolphins

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Interesting to see the whole “if you are down by 14 and score a touchdown, go for 2” thing actually pay off.

fleshwound_NPG

niners the first to climb mount playoff, the 1st to clinch https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2wPL9PoLqFY

WCS

¡Tits!

Mr. Ayo

LOLFins!

Mr. Ayo

Also, Don T celebrates reasonably: Part Uno

King Hippo

I hope he brought rum for the Magick Burger King crew, they kept the shop open MUY late.

WCS

PRAISE BLEERGH

Redshirt

Either I’m having a stroke or the SAP just kicked in for a commercial.

WCS

Don T’s pirate broadcast from Burger King.

Brocky

It did.

Mr. Ayo

¿Por qué no los dos?

King Hippo

Please put 3-4 FUCK YOU DOLPHIN! on fucking Nuk

Horatio Cornblower

Now that he has three straight wins the Giants front-office is working on a 4-year, $165 million extension for DeVito.

WCS

Fully guaranteed.

Horatio Cornblower

No-trade clause included.

yeah right

I’ve mentioned before that Jersey is a Giants state and New York can keep the Jets.

Also Tommy Cutlets is the greatest Jersey quarterback nickname ever.

Thanks for beating the Packers!

Recovery Whiskey

DeVito took the canoli

Horatio Cornblower

I think I’m happiest for Barkley. That was a bizarre play.

Brocky

Lol get fucked green bay

Recovery Whiskey

Always the right answer. FTP

Recovery Whiskey

That DeVito kid’s alright

Redshirt

Randy Bullock game winning field goal? Huh.

fleshwound_NPG

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Mr. Ayo

Hey, I’m winning over here!

Recovery Whiskey

Tommy DeVito gonna get his chance to deliver for the boss. Show us what you got kid

Dunstan

On my way back from my haircut tonight, I decided to cut through the mall and stop at the bookstore.

Before I knew what was happening, I was eliminated from the LDB Challenge. Just a dumb, dumb mistake. Don’t know what I was thinking.

WCS

Which reminds me, I am also out. Rolled the dice with going to Lil’ and Lil’er WCS’ Holiday Pageant Extravaganza and lost.

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Horatio Cornblower

You poor, foolish bastard.