Hey, you’re all busy doing that Xmas-y stuff and you need a break just so that you don’t wring some family member’s neck. Sit down, cool off and watch some football. That’s the ticket!
To The Game!
Bengals/Steelers:
-Pickett is still missing, Rudolf The Struggling QB is starting, their top three safeties are out, Pickens is an unhappy slacker and they’ve lost 4 of their last 5. What I’m trying to say is that Tomlin is going to make this game ugly and go down swinging.
-A compliment was given to Rudolf this week and it was something like, “He’s a professional”. That’s more of a description if you think about it. Be that as it may, he’s 3-0 vs the Bengals though he hasn’t started since 2021.
-Both Harris and Warren should be fine today given that Cincy is ranked 27th vs the run and their best rush defender Reader is out.
-As far as Mixon and Brown go, running the ball against Pitt is a no-go. Over the last two years their Expected Points Added on rushes is -.34. Catching balls out of the backfield is a different story though-that stat rises to +.62.
-Did you know that it’s no longer called Heinz Field? Pitt’s home now goes by Acrisure Stadium. I’m not familiar with that condiment.
-With Ja’Marr out Higgins yardage prop of 57.5 yards seems easily reachable.
-Playoff-wise this tilt is huge for the Bastard Spaghetti Chewers as they have K.C. on the road next week and then finish with Cleveland.
Drink some Eggnog or some such.
And now, a Gigsmas Eve update: Thank goodness I’m already out of the LDBC or else my best friend would have gotten me out right before the gun. In her defense if I don’t get there in time from my previous mass she’ll regrettably have to kill me.
While it was fun to prison-jump the Bungles again, below is the clubhouse leader for my favorite game of the season. I know Rikki’s loincloth concurs.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=96YDwkaCbnI&ab_channel=ThatsGoodSports
So many streaks!
Me: “That site that I write for-I’ve got a running joke that a black coach practices Voodoo. Is that racist?”
Wife: [stares at me]
Me: “Ok, right. But what if it works IRL?”
Wife: [doesn’t even bother to look up from her phone]
It’s true. You can’t deny it.
We mean it in a GOOD way, just like Jimmy the Greek!!
(ppl forget that)
Late to the game but the Steelers are kicking the crap out of Cincy.
Just finished the first season of Your Honor on Paramount. Bryan Cranston you know.
It’s solid with some crazy ass twists. I did not expect what I got.
Tomlin’s never had a non-losing season (yet), but the Stillers have never finished last in the AFC North.
HIGH END TALENT
Chaos league is chaotic, film at 11!
Woooooooohooooooooo! Merry Christmas to us yinzers!
WOOOOOOOOO!
browning is really shooting himself in the foot tonight
“Rookie.”
— Plaxico B., parts unknown
Rudolph should write a book about his up and down NFL tenure. Sommet like “My Struggle” perhaps.
31-11 is scoramgi.
Based on the past three quarters it seems unlikely to stay that way.
but based on past stillers games, two offenses coming to a complete stop with no warning can happen
So are 37-11 and 39-11.
You know it’s the End Times when Tomlin gets a challenge right.
Twice!
Two in a row! Gonna go buy some lottery tickets!
Bengals couldn’t even snap the ball quickly.
STILLERS GHANTA TECHMOE BAWL
Sorry, Ron, but when it comes to putting potentially hazardous things in one’s mouth I’m going to have to go with Nancy as the expert in the family.
if nancys the throat goat, does this ad make ronnie the puff king?
Chargers-Raiders last week vibes.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=apBWI6xrbLY
So I chose to start Higgins over Pickens, and I felt bad, then okay, now bad again.
I blame Boris somehow.
You picked this guy:
…over this guy?
Everyone under 35 has no idea who either of these characters are, nor what they are from. I might even say under 40.
“As it were, I was in the Belgian Congo with my pygmy porters . . .”
It’s fantastic when a banh mi sammich is 2 blocks away.
There’s a new banh mi place here but its grilled pork banh mi tastes more like a microwaved pork banh mi.
Oh that’s the worst.
pissing down rain now, just how erect IS Coach Epps?
Acrisure Stadium: We do what we must because we can, for the good of all of us (except the Bengals)
Evidently, back-up QB tape and scouting reports all get thrown in the trash immediately after the season is done. I don’t know how else to explain why so many are doing so well for like three weeks (except Titty-Kisser).
Forgive me if I’m late on this one, but Pickens is wearing a helmet with two mouthguards attached. Where does the other one go?
I think he just decorated for Christmas.
Given the game he’s having, a more appropriate Christmas decoration might have been to attach some mistletoe to his waistband.
I would make a joke about him talking out of his ass, but after that half, I got nothing to say besides incoherent rage.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bmPEA8eT4Fw&ab_channel=TomGrossi
I mean, it could be worse.
Jesus, that was purty.
Pft, Madden24. It’s all been downhill since SNES Tecmo Super Bowl.
Um, NFL Blitz erasure much?
My word! Kurt Browning and his band of Bengali Paper Tygers are no threat to anyone. The Men of Industry shall not lose this one!
Good jerb taking that point from the mongrel hordes earlier, btw.
Thought Arsenal played very well in the first half, then got very lucky to keep the point after a less-than-ideal second half.
The Steelers. It’s always the fucking Steelers.
They’re always stuck in the middle with you.
That was clearly pass interference, for all of you who say the refs favor the Steelers.
Stupid one-eyed monster fish
Stillers radio throwing shade at Pickens, saying not only did Jalen Warren block well for the previous touchdown run, “it takes all eleven to score in the NFL.” “We need more of that!”
Bengals got ran over by a reindeer
On the way to the playoffs Christmas Eve Eve
You might say there’s no such way that could happen
But as for me and Bengals fans, we believe
Future Aerially Inclined Butter Bars 21
Former US President 7 halftime
I CAN DUZE HIPPO SPEEK TWO
Uh, well…er…um…
Well, that was nice. I should probably turn it off now, it’s downhill all the way from here, I suspect.
Getting Pickens overconfident and even more cocky is an interesting strategy
Mmmyep.
It’s all downhill from here
I’ll take, “What did Spider Sabich say after his first date with Claudine Longet for 600”, Ken.
Be careful! That’s what I did with the Raiders game and I missed history.
Of course
*patpat*
Looks like Pitpat’s son is making up for his dad’s transgressions.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1wFUyszZvPE&ab_channel=LaserTime
Iosivas is starting?
He and Chase are your next outside receivers for the next five years at least. The coaching staff loves him.
Think I’ll keep playing Dredge instead of watching this game
Right? I’m gonna fire up Homeworld instead of watching this fucking game.
Homeworld 3 2024!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
Then one rainy Christmas Eve Eve, Redshirt came to say
Rudolph with you crappy arm, won’t you suck once more today?
I’m not the only person who sucks at creative writing
I can’t speak for Redshirt, but
I should be jacked for this weekend, but I’m just tired. This is middle-age with children, right?
Back in the day there were a bunch of us that worked around 40 hours between Thursday night-Sunday night at the pub and then went to school from Monday to Thursday at noon. If anyone said, “I’m so tired” anyone that heard it would respond with, “So tired” in the choir voice featured in this tune.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYomVbcJKhI&ab_channel=Alfie
One of the announcers of this game is Todd Blackledge, one of the guys always mentioned in the “magnificent’ qb draft class of ’83. Yeah, that guy that had a below 50% completion percentage and a 29/38 TD/INT number over his seven year career deserves to be mentioned alongside Marino, Jim Kelly, Tony Eason (went to a Super Bowl) and Jeff Hostetler. (won a Super Bowl)
/not even mentioning Babe “That’ll do, pig” Laufenberg who went on to a very successful Hollywood career.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltPeUVvAD6Q&ab_channel=WVUsports
I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again. The Giants wouldn’t have reached the Super Bowl in ’91 were it not for his mobility. The Niners had one of the greatest D’s of all time but they had no answer for Hoss’s ability to move around in the pocket and to gain yards running when the pocket collapsed.
/Walsh and Co were still game-planning for the flat-footed Simms to be playing